When you can't decide if you want a life of sobriety.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 1,393
Dear aleister, when new to sobriety, it is not that fun. Boring even. But when you have continuous sobertime, you begin to actually live life sober. It gets to be great. Like when you were a kid, before you ever drank. Your real personality comes thru. Life is fun and full of joy naturally with longterm sobriety. You must get to that point to see it. I hope you continue on..it's pretty amazing.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 776
Originally Posted by Notmyrealname 
I know what you mean, but all that warm fuzzy feeling and being relaxed in social situations and having a buzz .. it's not enough to counterbalance all the awful stuff.
Plus that courage-in-a-bottle was just a crutch. Abusing it got in the way of developing real courage and confidence. It stunts your growth on many levels -- emotionally, career-ly (I don't think that is a word, but I do what I want), and it stymies ambition and sucks the joy out of you by inches.
For me it was just a huge relief to finally get out of my own way. Hobbies, interests, personal growth, long-term goals, it's like self-improvement Disneyland.
Plus that courage-in-a-bottle was just a crutch. Abusing it got in the way of developing real courage and confidence. It stunts your growth on many levels -- emotionally, career-ly (I don't think that is a word, but I do what I want), and it stymies ambition and sucks the joy out of you by inches.
For me it was just a huge relief to finally get out of my own way. Hobbies, interests, personal growth, long-term goals, it's like self-improvement Disneyland.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: NY
Posts: 18
Originally Posted by atm23
aleister - Your story sounds A LOT like mine. My personality was very much attached to the bottle. People knew me as the "party guy" and expected when they'd see me I'd be beer in hand ready to joke and be loud. I can remember wanting to quit drinking in my mid 20s, somewhere around 25-26, but I remember telling myself "everyone expects the drunk guy so I'll just give it to them".
What people didn't know is that wasn't really me. They were getting this fake guy who secretly was very unhappy and knew there was a problem.
What people didn't know is that wasn't really me. They were getting this fake guy who secretly was very unhappy and knew there was a problem.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 5,937
I doubt you will believe what I'm about to tell you. A year ago I wouldn't have believed it myself. I also thought that quitting would be an epic sacrifice, that all the fun would be gone from my life. But sitting here now I can promise you that if you quit you'll look back one day in amazement that you ever believed such a stupid notion! The longer you drink the less it's fun. It takes more and more to get the high and the aftermath gets worse and worse.
Alcohol is prison, plain and simple. A prison where all the doors are wide open. You can stand across the street and marvel at all the inmates inside. Why do they stay in there? Don't they see they can just walk out? Are they all insane?
There's nothing alcohol can give you that you can't have without it, and the price it extorts from you is so high.
Alcohol is prison, plain and simple. A prison where all the doors are wide open. You can stand across the street and marvel at all the inmates inside. Why do they stay in there? Don't they see they can just walk out? Are they all insane?
There's nothing alcohol can give you that you can't have without it, and the price it extorts from you is so high.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Engerland
Posts: 897
I relate totally.
'Alcohol gave me the wings to fly, then it took away the sky'.
I drank to be part of, and it worked for a while. Then i found i couldn't stop and stay stopped when i wanted to.
That's when it took away the sky.
It became the grim reaper and took away all, and i mean all, that i loved or cared for, leaving me homeless, friendless and hopeless.
Still i drank to recapture those 'old days' when it had worked.
It almost took my life.
Then i surrendered completely and stopped fighting.
Reached out for help.
I'm getting well.
Be safe.
G
'Alcohol gave me the wings to fly, then it took away the sky'.
I drank to be part of, and it worked for a while. Then i found i couldn't stop and stay stopped when i wanted to.
That's when it took away the sky.
It became the grim reaper and took away all, and i mean all, that i loved or cared for, leaving me homeless, friendless and hopeless.
Still i drank to recapture those 'old days' when it had worked.
It almost took my life.
Then i surrendered completely and stopped fighting.
Reached out for help.
I'm getting well.
Be safe.
G
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 638
To give a somewhat direct answer to the burning question... I can also relate to all that, I used to think alcohol took me to a wonderland of inspiration and adventure etc... in the beginning, I guess it even did something for me, but not much good after that.
To think abandoning alcohol for good is a large idea and can seem overwhelming... therefore it is fair to take sobriety to a testdrive, one day at a time, no more. And if you like the car, keep it and don't pay for it, the price is driving it, one day at a time.
To think abandoning alcohol for good is a large idea and can seem overwhelming... therefore it is fair to take sobriety to a testdrive, one day at a time, no more. And if you like the car, keep it and don't pay for it, the price is driving it, one day at a time.
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