Day 3
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 60
Day 3
This is the evening of day 3. I feel pretty good. Still fasting. I had fasted a few weeks ago and today my thoughts are going back to then when I went to my gf place and talked to her. Not sure we will make it threw my last fall. At any rate what I'm reflecting on is the things I said after being sober for a month. The promises I had made. The clarity I had. The person that I really am is still hard to see right now. I see myself and a monster that lives within me. That monster likes to try and destroy the person I know myself to be. Gf has prolly had it. It's been a roller coaster for four long and trying years. I decide this moment that the monster has not won the war. I have willingly given him victory for far too long. I don't have the current energy that I'd like to but I am determined to not let the thoughts of stopping off get the better of me. Just had one on the way home. Stupid as that sounds. I am home now and will vacuum out my truck and clean the upholstery, more remnants of my bender this weekend. Maintaining motivation, beating depression, loving who I am and who I will become by staying sober is what I'm trying to focus on. Thanks SR for this community and God for finding it.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: bradford, england
Posts: 110
i empathise. i think my boyf must feel the same.
still, you managed a month-that is a tremendous amount of time!
i managed 2 years, then went back. its so difficult.
i hope you find the strength to get through
x
still, you managed a month-that is a tremendous amount of time!
i managed 2 years, then went back. its so difficult.
i hope you find the strength to get through
x
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 60
Got my truck done. Took out seats and steamed cleaned everything. Talked a bit and now thinking about when I drink I say things I don't recall. The aftermath is horrible and depressing and I promise I will change. But haven't. So what that does is turns me into a complete liar. I don't mean to not mean the things that I say but when my actions don't back up me saying its the last time or I will quit that's all it comes out to be. This has got to be it!! 3 days into my new life.
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 737
Ge7 - on day 3, thoughts are still all over the place 
Hang in there - a couple of days from now, things will seem a whole lot easier in your mind. Ride the wave for now and keep on doing what you're doing coz it's working beautifully
Hang in there - a couple of days from now, things will seem a whole lot easier in your mind. Ride the wave for now and keep on doing what you're doing coz it's working beautifully
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