Aislin

Thanks IOAA2, yes I am thinking I might be taking on too much with dieting and refraining from alcohol. I will concentrate mainly on staying sober. If I need that something sweet I will allow myself it. I guess it makes a lot of sense considering how much sugar is in wine

I love your quotes at the bottom of your reply, they are great

ImperfectlyMe

Give yourself this week to not worry about weight loss, there is time for that but right now your sobriety is very delicate and breakable. Do not weigh yourself (I did..freaked me out) the body is going through a tremendous recovery mode. I was so bloated that first week, I think my kidneys were adjusting to all the dehydration and alcohol rehydration. When feeling cravings or mood swings ask yourself...,"am I hungry, thirsty, tired" give your body what it's asking for. Lots of fluids and nutrient foods. Plenty of sleep when sleepyness calls, which isn't always at night. Be good to yourself and treat yourself to small indulgences... Candle lit bath and book, expensive cafe cappuccino, manicure, facial, a new lipstick anything that makes you feel special! You can do this rooting for you

hayley86

Hi Aislin,
Glad to see you back here today. Do you have a plan for keeping yourself busy when 4 o'clock rolls around so you are not tempted to drink?. I used to have something planned to distract myself at times when i would have normally drank. I was less tempted that way. Wishing you well.

Aislin

Hi, 4 o'clock is the time when I start convincing myself it will be okay to drink but I don't tend to start drinking until about 6.30. I don't really have a plan but might go and have a nice bubbly bath, I love reading but don't tend to so much these days so a bath and book would be lovely!

I feel abit uptight. I have already starting the thought process of 'I cant do this', 'why cant I have a drink if I want to?' I have so many thoughts running through my head! I keep thinking ahead to the weekend, Friday night is always my biggest night!

I am just trying to think about tonight I am not going to have a drink, simple as that. I am trying to stop my thoughts when they come and do something else.

hayley86

That sounds like a good plan Aislin. Do anything to distract yourself and try and not think about the weekend. You can deal with that when it arrives. Just focus on not having a drink today. Ignore any voice that tells you that you cant do it. You definitely can.

ZoeM

Can you not treat yourself to something else for Friday and the weekend? My first one I bought loads of ice-cream and sweets and chocolate. (you're not having empty booze calories remember). It does help to still 'celebrate' the weekend in some way

dwtbd

You can do this, it helped me to just concentrate on not drinking 'now'. The now I'm in, its really the only one there is
When the now is 4 or 6 or Friday, I still only have to not drink 'now' , after some time passes the urgent need to think of now dissipates, but not the urgency of keeping the not drinking part, it becomes 'easier' to live in the now

wish you well

Aislin

Thanks for the advice, yes I am going to try and just think about the 'now' . I am getting uptight about not being able to drink at the weekend so I am going to completely forget about that for now and just concentrate on tonight.

MTD

This sounds like our life before we quit. My AH and I where both heavy drinkers. We would get horribly drunk and fight. Next day we would get up and go to work business as usual. One night driving home drunk we got pulled over and Ah was arrested. Next day he says he has had enough and checked into rehab which in turn made me take a close look at my drinking. I started AA and have been sober since Aug 2. Life is so much better now. It takes just that eye opening experience to make you realize that it is not a way to live. Hope you both find the path to sobriety.

dwtbd

I hope the now thinking does help, I think it helped me because I wasn't confident enough in my self to not drink 'at some time in the future' , but I knew I could in the immediate moment, don't worry about tonight, when you realize 'now' is a handle-able time frame, just stay there mentally , and later(tonight, next week ect) will at some point be 'now'. The stress , which you do not need, is from trying to predict your future actions, just worry about now not even tonight

Aislin

Starting to feel like its unfair that I cant have a drink tonight. This is going to be really hard

jaynie04

Hi Aislin, welcome!
I was just like you when I was drinking (I have 63 days today). I had gained 35 pounds, I hated looking in the mirror. None of my clothes fit and those that did were uncomfortable. I actually went up to the attic and pulled out clothing I had worn while I was pregnant.

I had always been an athlete, but every part of my body ached. My head ached. My skin looked like crap. Personal hygiene was a chore. Looking in the mirror was painful. I did the minimum each day so I could curl up with 2 bottles of wine at night.

Everything was attached to drinking. Night out, drink. Night in, drink. Happy, drink. Anxious, drink. Sad, drink. Feeling out of shape, drink. Realizing my life was out of control, drink. Nothing to do, drink. God it was so exhausting.

I too tried dieting. I would automatically try a diet with the contingency that I was still going to drink. I would wake up (often in my clothes) and go down to the kitchen to see plates full of half eaten crap. I would chug a cup of coffee to function enough to get my daughter off to school.

It was insanity. After I stopped drinking I was gentle with myself. I didn't go on a crash diet, I knew that not drinking was the most important thing, and that I was saving my life. Because for those of us who are alcoholics this is a fight against a terminal disease.

I got on the scale last week, I had lost 12 pounds. I had my hair done yesterday. I look 10 years younger. My body doesn't hurt anymore. The promises I read about are starting to come true again. It is a pleasure waking up and knowing what I did and said the night before.

The more time you put between yourself and the bottle, you will realize that you are not depriving yourself of something, you are giving yourself the gift of a future!

MTD

You are your own person. Only you can make the decision to take that drink. Yes I agree its not fair that and alcoholic cannot drink...even one. That is the reality of this addiction. You have no control where that drink will take you. But there is hope and you have to realize that! Stay strong.

kellyg

Keeping thinking about all the reasons you want to quit. Re-read your old posts to also help you remember why for want a sober life. It may help. Good luck.

jaynie04

Ive got 22 days sober today. One of my SR comrades said "Alpha, you gotta beg, borrow or steal those few precious months of sobriety to really see what life has in store for you". I heeded that and can't believe the difference.

I love that AO, thank you!

serenity333

Yes, It's so important to admit there is a problem. You have done this.

My question to you is, are you drinking at all while your children are awake? I ask this because my son is a huge factor in my recovery. I had myself convinced that just because I wasn't "drunk" and I was "functioning" that he wasn't affected. Now, I realize that he IS affected when I take that first drink. The fact that I HAVE to drink is a sign that I'm not there emotionally for him. I need a chemical to have fun with him. I could be ashamed of this but that will only inhibit my recovery. I'm not perfect, but I am trying my best. Today is a new day and I cannot beat myself up about yesterday.

I'm struggling as well. I am now praying every day which is new to me. Only God can help me.

Wish you well,

serenity333

AlefVavResh

That, right there, is what really motivated me to get back on track.

Keep posting. How are you doing?

winkster26

Wonderful. I'm just trying to get through today!

Nuudawn

Glad to see you are still here Aislin! For me, sober road is all about taming my "bats-in-the-belfry" mind. I had to appoint a new chairperson for the committee of whiny freaks that live in there : ) The new chair is sober and man oh man, does she get some backlash from the committee who were used to the "endless party". Back in June I made a decision for a new life...a new way. I was tired of doing what I've always done and getting what I've always gotten...a whole lot of misery. I'm 46 years old and finally undertaking the process of growing the hell up. It's a process..not an event. Alcohol is a mind/body damaging poison..pure and simple. I shut "deprived debbie" up with that one