Day 6 and struggling
EndGame
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 4,677
Yeah, there are very few jobs that are equivalent to working on the U.S.S. Enterprise.
After surgery last year, I was walking for a few days with a cane...until my doctor told me he thought I was using it as a crutch.
After surgery last year, I was walking for a few days with a cane...until my doctor told me he thought I was using it as a crutch.
Hey Acheleus....Rome wasn't built in a day. I think I'm of the same mind as Endgame here. No matter where we go, we are going to stumble across arses. I was complaining to my therapist just the other day about the work environment of my second job. She told me I could indeed quit that environment but more than likely, I'm going to come across the same obstacles in another one and that perhaps it's best I use the opportunity to work on my own issues within what is already familiar. Lessons will keep appearing no matter where we go.
Another thing I want to comment on is what comes across as "shame" about your "alcoholic" status. I think that has to change. Alcohol is something you are simply trying to outgrow as a p*ss poor remedy to pain, discomfort, anxiety etc. Alcohol, cigarettes, drugs..whatever are "crutches". Think about what crutches do? Crutches are what we use when we have trouble walking on our own. Don't hate yourself because you wear the burden of the broken issues of those who came before you. Your parents didn't have good solutions or insight into their problems either.
I am not ashamed of myself because I didn't know any better. You shouldn't be either.
Another thing I want to comment on is what comes across as "shame" about your "alcoholic" status. I think that has to change. Alcohol is something you are simply trying to outgrow as a p*ss poor remedy to pain, discomfort, anxiety etc. Alcohol, cigarettes, drugs..whatever are "crutches". Think about what crutches do? Crutches are what we use when we have trouble walking on our own. Don't hate yourself because you wear the burden of the broken issues of those who came before you. Your parents didn't have good solutions or insight into their problems either.
I am not ashamed of myself because I didn't know any better. You shouldn't be either.
Back home after teaching and I think my classes went well, I put on a happy face. thanks Endgame and Nuudawn, I have to grow up. No big decisions in the first year of sobriety. Eating some lunch and revising an assignment I have to submit by this evening. Trying to get to an AA meeting at seven which is close to where I live. So I have to finish this assignment soon or I will not have enough time. Thank you guys for helping me. The wellbutrin gives me no side effects and I feel good on it, I'm not as full of negative thoughts. I apologize for the negative posts, and I will work on letting go of the shame I feel with being an alcoholic.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: UK (England)
Posts: 2,782
Drinking will make everything much worse. You need to persevere and carry on with all the positive steps you have been taking lately and break the cycle. Keeping busy with assignment and long walk sounds like a great plan. I hope you feel better. Stay strong. It will get easier.
EndGame
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 4,677
It takes time for people to habituate to Welbutrin and other antidepressants. Most people stop prematurely because they can't or won't tolerate the side effects, which are often temporary. Quitting before you enjoy the potential benefits is something that's best handled between you and your doctor.
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