Hi
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 3
Hi
I'm so scared I haven't set up my profile yet.
I was in rehab back in 2008 and was sober until january of this year
then i lost my job due to cutbacks and have been depressed and drinking since then a 12 pack of beer a day and I want to stop so badly but I'm scared as hell of the DTs even though I know I'm killing myself with the beer.
Every day I say it's my last case and that I'm going to taper them off since I don't have enough Xanax (only 3.5 mg left) for a full three-day dosage and so I don't know where this ends or how to end it. I'm more scared of having a seizure than I am of continuing to drink, and I have gastritis and my belly is swollen and painful I've been through this before.
But this time I want to quit for good. My mother has been supportive and thinks that I'm just having trouble finding a job because of the competitive field I work in, and she's dipped into her 401k to pay my rent and I can't allow that it weighs so badly on my conscience.
Going to rehab is not an option I can't be out of commission for 30 days because I've interviewed and need to land a job so my mother can stop paying. I have no money and refuse to ask her for some to go to the doctor for a temp Xanax scrip and metoclopramide.
And I hate AA, it's help for my severe depression that caused the drinking in the first place when I lost my health insurance that I need, but no money equals no depression medication, hence the alcohol which only makes it worse and I'm smart enough to know this, but can't stop because I'm scared of dying of DT. I don't know what to do, but I'm so glad I've found this place. Again. I just want to be normal and this sucks.
I was in rehab back in 2008 and was sober until january of this year
then i lost my job due to cutbacks and have been depressed and drinking since then a 12 pack of beer a day and I want to stop so badly but I'm scared as hell of the DTs even though I know I'm killing myself with the beer.
Every day I say it's my last case and that I'm going to taper them off since I don't have enough Xanax (only 3.5 mg left) for a full three-day dosage and so I don't know where this ends or how to end it. I'm more scared of having a seizure than I am of continuing to drink, and I have gastritis and my belly is swollen and painful I've been through this before.
But this time I want to quit for good. My mother has been supportive and thinks that I'm just having trouble finding a job because of the competitive field I work in, and she's dipped into her 401k to pay my rent and I can't allow that it weighs so badly on my conscience.
Going to rehab is not an option I can't be out of commission for 30 days because I've interviewed and need to land a job so my mother can stop paying. I have no money and refuse to ask her for some to go to the doctor for a temp Xanax scrip and metoclopramide.
And I hate AA, it's help for my severe depression that caused the drinking in the first place when I lost my health insurance that I need, but no money equals no depression medication, hence the alcohol which only makes it worse and I'm smart enough to know this, but can't stop because I'm scared of dying of DT. I don't know what to do, but I'm so glad I've found this place. Again. I just want to be normal and this sucks.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,416
Welcome to SR 
You'll find a lot of methods at play here - I recommend you read around - find an approach you like and go that way
there's a lot of support here in any case - and we're all pretty friendly
glad you've joined us
D
You'll find a lot of methods at play here - I recommend you read around - find an approach you like and go that way
there's a lot of support here in any case - and we're all pretty friendly
glad you've joined us
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 3
Originally Posted by Dee74 
Welcome to SR
You'll find a lot of methods at play here - I recommend you read around - find an approach you like and go that way
there's a lot of support here in any case - and we're all pretty friendly
glad you've joined us
D
You'll find a lot of methods at play here - I recommend you read around - find an approach you like and go that way
there's a lot of support here in any case - and we're all pretty friendly
glad you've joined us
D
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Around and About
Posts: 1,254
I remember you SoberSista, and I am so sorry you have been going through so much suffering. Can you see your Dr. (who prescribed the Xanax) and have him/her help? I know nothing about the Xanax/beer combo (or DTs for that matter).
There is the "search" feature above, and googling might give you more info.
You are not alone; keep posting. This person's thread may help:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...r-day-1-a.html
There is the "search" feature above, and googling might give you more info.
You are not alone; keep posting. This person's thread may help:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...r-day-1-a.html
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 3
Originally Posted by Pamel
I remember you SoberSista, and I am so sorry you have been going through so much suffering. Can you see your Dr. (who prescribed the Xanax) and have him/her help? I know nothing about the Xanax/beer combo (or DTs for that matter).
There is the "search" feature above, and googling might give you more info.
You are not alone; keep posting. This person's thread may help:
There is the "search" feature above, and googling might give you more info.
You are not alone; keep posting. This person's thread may help:
And I have googled. That's what brought me back here, and what I've seen on various google searches says I need 2-2.5mg of Xanax/day for three days to detox without seizures (I tried to detox last week and had a mini-seizure and that's why I'm scared as hell). My dad is a doctor but weirdly doesn't believe in alcoholism or depression, even though his brother died of liver failure/cirrhosis/alcoholsim. His advice to me was to just take walks and write in a journal and get over it and he's avoiding me and I don't blame him. I'm literally toxic right now, and incredibly sad.
Thank you for the link and for your kindness it means a lot. I appreciate it so much will go there now to read.
Member
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Sweden
Posts: 1,649
Hi SS: I don't know where you are, but you can try to find some help for assisted withdrawals. You might even get some information from the rehab place where you were before. I started my road to recovery by looking for a lot of phone numbers!
Pamel makes a good point: do you have a doctor you can talk to? A doctor will be your best advice for managing the detox. I don't know anything about Xanax either - you can do this, you have been sober before so the path is not unfamiliar to you -
Pamel makes a good point: do you have a doctor you can talk to? A doctor will be your best advice for managing the detox. I don't know anything about Xanax either - you can do this, you have been sober before so the path is not unfamiliar to you -
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: NE Wisconsin USA
Posts: 6,223
If you are at the point where you think you will go in to DTs.....
I would not stop drinking abruptly....and ASAP see a DR or GNP
and get yourself in to medical detox.
It is so important you take care of yourself medically...with love and pulling for you.
I would not stop drinking abruptly....and ASAP see a DR or GNP
and get yourself in to medical detox.
It is so important you take care of yourself medically...with love and pulling for you.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,416
The Class of August is a good thread to start with - it's full of people quitting this month, at more or less the same point you are
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...art-3-a-7.html
With regards to detox, I absolutely agree with those who've recommended you seek professional medical advice.
Now, not everyone has a bad detox - but there's no way to discern whether you will or not beforehand.
It's best to be safe - & best to let your Dr decide what you need in your particular case.
Google is great for info but only a doctor can access you and your detox needs individually.
D
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...art-3-a-7.html
With regards to detox, I absolutely agree with those who've recommended you seek professional medical advice.
Now, not everyone has a bad detox - but there's no way to discern whether you will or not beforehand.
It's best to be safe - & best to let your Dr decide what you need in your particular case.
Google is great for info but only a doctor can access you and your detox needs individually.
D
Last edited by Dee74; 08-23-2013 at 01:13 AM.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Long Beach, CA
Posts: 705
I understand that your father, despite being an M.D., does not believe in withdrawal (WTF???). Did you tell your father you had a seizure? Even if he doesn't believe in alcoholic withdrawal, I'm sure that he understands how dangerous a seizure can be. Perhaps you should go to your mother and tell her the truth. I'm a Mom, and if one of my children were in your situation, I would ABSOLUTELY want to know.
If you are feeling really terrible you can go to an ER, and because of EMTLA (Emergency Medical Treatment Labor Act) you are legally entitled to care, even if you cannot pay. However, this will become a bad debt, and affect your credit rating. But credit ratings don't mean much if you're dead! If and when you go, make sure to tell the attending physician that you have already had a seizure...you will be taken MUCH more seriously. If you feel at all suicidal, tell them. They are required to admit you, and will almost certainly place you on a 51-50 3 day hold in the psych ward. The upside of this is that your detox will be monitored. Hospitals usually have social workers who can help you arrange some kind of sober living arrangement. There are a number of free programs available including Volunteers of America and the Salvation Army. This may sound scary to you, but I've met many sober, happy people who have come through these programs.
It's time to get serious Sobasista! It sounds like you are fed up, and that's a good thing. Keep posting so we can share in your success!
If you are feeling really terrible you can go to an ER, and because of EMTLA (Emergency Medical Treatment Labor Act) you are legally entitled to care, even if you cannot pay. However, this will become a bad debt, and affect your credit rating. But credit ratings don't mean much if you're dead! If and when you go, make sure to tell the attending physician that you have already had a seizure...you will be taken MUCH more seriously. If you feel at all suicidal, tell them. They are required to admit you, and will almost certainly place you on a 51-50 3 day hold in the psych ward. The upside of this is that your detox will be monitored. Hospitals usually have social workers who can help you arrange some kind of sober living arrangement. There are a number of free programs available including Volunteers of America and the Salvation Army. This may sound scary to you, but I've met many sober, happy people who have come through these programs.
It's time to get serious Sobasista! It sounds like you are fed up, and that's a good thing. Keep posting so we can share in your success!
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