drae

hello everyone I am going through something a little different but I think you all could probably help me understand what my husband is going through. my husband is currently getting ready to serve time in prison due to his drug problem. I have never been an addict so his problem is a little hard for me to understand. I feel like I have lost him. I just don't get why he cant give up the drugs for his family, we have three beautiful children together who need there daddy. I guess what I don't understand is why someone who had everything he ever could have wanted in life would throw it all away fro drugs??? I have been so supportive telling him I will help him get through this and do whatever it takes. I don't want to be another person to give up on him but I am afraid he does not want to live sober, I know I cant make him change but I am afraid he is going to die. I am not allowed to speak to him due to an assault charge (he was high and attacked me) so in a way I feel like he is dead and I am not sure how to best cope with this when he is sober he is a wonderful man and father. please any words of advice would be nice, but if you have nothing constructive to say just ignore my post. thank you so much

Dee74

Hi Drae

I'm really sorry for your situation - I wish I had a really good answer for you.

The best I can do is say there's no logic to addiction - it's all about the moment and the now of getting high - there's rarely if ever any thought about the consequences.

It makes good men into bad ones, and some of us keep doing selfish dumb stuff to the people we love over and over again.

I really hope your husband decides to turn things around - but if he doesn't you need to think about you and the kids and your welfare.

Only you can decide if the risk of his never changing is worth it...but you'll find a lot of support understanding and help here

D
D

MythOfSisyphus

Welcome, Drae. I'm sorry to hear what you're going through. Addiction is very destructive, and not just to the addict. All you can do at this point is take care of yourself and your children. Be there for your husband as much as you can be have firm boundaries. Addiction doesn't care about what it takes to feed itself, and it doesn't care who lives or dies. He isn't his addiction but so long as it's calling the shots there isn't much more you can do.