3 weeks and another CRASH AND BURN :-(
 

After the 3 week mark I really felt in control. It's was almost a surreal feeling.

Two days later I proved that I was far from it. Long story short, after some family drama I completely and totally fell off the wagon last night:-(

Instead of coming here or calling a sober support buddy I reconnected with I went straight to the liquor cabinet almost like a defiant little child.

It sucks but what REALLY sucked is that at about 3am I woke up with SEVERE abdominal pain. Started off as the entire area but over the course of around 2 hours it centralized on my right side and hurt so bad I literally curled up in a ball on the cold tile.

Never experienced anything like it. Anyone else after a period of sobriety fallen off and experienced something like that?

Anyway - it's 2pm today and I am STILL in pain although nothing like I was in the night.

Not looking for a diagnosis as I already made an appointment with my DR just thought it was VERY strange.

Oh well - back to day 1 again as this beast still obviously has a tremendous hold on me.

Hope everyone else is doing well!!!

Glad you're seeing your doctor, Bob, and welcome back :)

I cannot count the number of times I felt all smug and satisfied at having beaten this thing...and then found myself drinking again.

My addiction really loves me getting complacent.

You know the old adage 'use it or lose it'? I found that applies to my recovery work too.

at least you can tick that lesson off now Bob :)

D

I am glad you made an appointment with your Doctor Bob. I don't have any experience with the pain you have described, but it sounds brutal. I am sorry your AV got the best of you due to your family drama. This is just another reminder that no matter how much I think I have control of this disease in reality I don't.

Yeah, its a hard learned lesson for sure. Feeling in control is a great and natural feeling of course. Using that feeling for drinking never worked well for me. Having that sense of control is useless for drinking is my experience.

Knowing its impossible to control my drinking really just helps me enjoy my not drinking all the more, lol.

It wasn't easy to quit, but it sure is easy to stay quit now having learned a thing or two about myself and my past drinking. :)

Go ahead and put this recent drinking all behind you, Bob. Quit again with a better understanding and you'll absolutely be way more successful. And of course, if you can quit for three weeks, you can quit for as long as you want. Knowing that also can really help you be successful with staying quit too!

Hi Bob. Glad you posted about this. We all understand.

I fell back on alcohol to cope for so many years - it was very hard to allow myself to deal with things sober. It's so much better facing problems without numbing ourselves & staying clear headed to decide what to do about things that need attention. Once I realized drinking was never, ever going to make anything easier, more fun, or better - I was able to let go of it. I don't know why I spent decades insisting I could control it and use it to benefit me. You've learned something valuable, and you are back. You can do it Bob! :)

This is what I told myself this morning and it's a good point!

It is easy to feel in control when we're sober ;)

Bob, I hope you will go to the ER or doctor sharpish about that pain. Let us know how you get on x

I'm glad you're going to see your dr and it's good that you're back and on track.

Hi Bob,
I had similar severe abdominal pains and ended up in the ER. It was pancreatitis from the booze. It was enough of a health scare to have doctors concerned. I certainly suggest you visit a doctor to get checked out.

Sad to hear you relapsed, but super happy you are not giving up! Have you considered going to AA meetings?

DrunkeBob, I was listening to this vedio while reading your thread. You mighta crashed but ya didn't burn. Just start again that's all you can do. Rootin for ya. :egypt:

Dire Straits - The Bug: (Official Music Video) - YouTube

Another strong lesson Bob!
Keep on coming back, and yes, a doctor for sure!:headbange

I hope your doc appointment is informative! You mentioned "heading to the liquor cabinet" following some family drama. For me, it was a necessity to remove all alcohol from my house. To keep any would mean that I intend to drink at a future point.

You actually crossed my mind just yesterday Bob. I wondered what you were up to as I hadn't seen anything here from you in awhile. Apparently now I know what you were up to : ) You can do this Bob. I know you can. Glad you're here.

Beware the dummy spit.

Hope you feel better soon. it does get easier with time- it helps to have something to hang onto at times of crisis

I thought it would be good to give everybody an update here.

Sorry if this is long-winded it's just the last couple of days were pretty profound to me.

I mentioned the pain that I experienced. My appt for the doctor was actually for today (Thursday).

About 3 hours after making this original post the pain in my abdomen began increasing. My wife convinced me to put away my "man card" and go visit the ER. I ABSOLUTELY hate going to the doctor and the ER is generally out of the question. I was pretty terrified however that I may have finally damaged something and that waiting until Thursday would be stupid.

I called the advice nurse who quickly arranged a phone consult with a doctor. She called back in 5 minutes. After describing my symptoms she said she wouldn't be able to sleep tonight if I didn't head straight to the ER. So I did.

My wife dropped me off and went to look for parking. I went to patient check in and was tagged (wrist band) and lead immediately to a room for vitals etc. Blood pressure was through the roof (of course). From there I was lead to my main room to visit my nurse and doctor. Between about 6:30pm and 9:00pm they put in an IV, took several viles of blood, took a urine test and gave me a CT scan.

Even though it was incredibly quick in "medical time" it felt like ages I had to think about the fact that this was finally it. All these years of drinking and partying had finally caught up to me. My bed was stationed right next to the BLUE command station of the ER where the attending doctor would assess patients and then communicate with someone on the phone the best course of action. Two of the patients he would refer to as "alcoholics". Neither of them was me but it was strange because you could tell it was almost as if they were some second-class type of patient (even though I am sure they were not in the physicians eyes).

I was dreading when the subject of alcohol intake would come up and was surprised it hadn't already.

About 30 minutes after my CT scan my doctor casually walked in and said "acute appendicitis". Amazing. Scary. About the one thing that actually didn't involve alcohol.

30 minutes later a surgeon walked in and discussed options of which he said there was really only one. Emergency surgery. The next hour was spent with 3 separate people discussing my history of alcohol consumption. Not because of causing appendicitis but because of complicating the surgery with withdrawal symptoms. I assured them I had more than 30 days of sobriety in the last 35 or so days and we proceeded with the surgery.

A huge shout out to the medical teams. It was the most efficient, seamless application of quality health care I have ever been a part of.

Surgery went well and I was home by 3pm yesterday.

This experience has changed me forever. I will no longer continue to abuse my body. I will never ignore severe pain. When my doctor said I had a high tolerance for pain - I said maybe, but I have a lower tolerance for hospitals.

Sorry for the rambling but thought it was important to conclude what happened. I sit here making his post happy to be alive.

I don't ever want to be referred to as "alcoholic" in the the ER.

Very humbling.

Wow! That same thing happened to me when I was 27 years old. My husband thought my symptoms were caused by drinking too much, but down deep inside I knew something was very wrong. I finally convinced him to take me to ER and had emergency appendectomy too! Thank God your wife had the presence of mind to take you in. She saved your life!

PS. You said you didn't want to be referred again as an "alcoholic." I don't know if you have attended any AA meetings but the first thing we do is say "Hi. My name is ----- and I'm an alcoholic. I will be an alcoholic for life ALBEIT recovering alcoholic.

Thanks for sharing your story, Bob. Glad the docs got you fixed right up. I had a friend who refused to put away his "man card" and ended up with a BURST appendix. Boy, was THAT a long hospital stay for the poor b@stard! Very scary situation, too. Nice to hear you are OK and that you learned from the experience.

Wow.. I am glad you are ok and thank you for your candidness, Jess

I'm an alcoholic. I just don't want to be referred to as one in the ER. It was profound to me the way he said it.

Glad you are still going strong Eleni!!!!!