Day 1
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Canada
Posts: 3,984
Mizzuno,
Thank you for your insightful post.
"Now, for the real work. The how do I deal with my issues of abandonment, of depression, of isolation? Why do I think that my identity is wrapped into a substance that I despise? Who and what am I? Where do I fit?"
This part especially resonated with me. It is hard work, Acheleus, but it seems to me that fear is keeping you not only stuck, but at risk of behaviours that could threaten your very life.
Please stay connected here, and with whatever supportive network of mental health services that is available to you.
Sending you good wishes, and I hope you find some calm this evening.
Thank you for your insightful post.
"Now, for the real work. The how do I deal with my issues of abandonment, of depression, of isolation? Why do I think that my identity is wrapped into a substance that I despise? Who and what am I? Where do I fit?"
This part especially resonated with me. It is hard work, Acheleus, but it seems to me that fear is keeping you not only stuck, but at risk of behaviours that could threaten your very life.
Please stay connected here, and with whatever supportive network of mental health services that is available to you.
Sending you good wishes, and I hope you find some calm this evening.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,313
I'm glad you're seeing your counsellor and Dr - be honest with them, Ach.
When you've done that maybe you need to think about how you can do more for your recovery as well?
like other have said this is great - - but you need to do more than just say it now Ach.
do yourself a real favour and follow through
D
When you've done that maybe you need to think about how you can do more for your recovery as well?
like other have said this is great -
I am done. I surrender and understand alcohol is not for me.
do yourself a real favour and follow through
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 1,920
Reading about alcoholism. I will make a list of things I can do. I am so tired of this, I have to forgive myself and be nice to me. Posting on SR is important. I will walk this evening. Listen to AA speaker tapes and go to a meeting. Why do I feel scared to leave my house though? Seeing my counselor tomorrow.
EndGame
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 4,677
Originally Posted by Acheleus 
I just need to calm down and be strong. Starting to feel a little better.
In many of your comments, you seem to feel overwhelmed with...everything.
I'd recommend your remedy, but it doesn't appear that this has worked for you.
Instead, I'd look into extending whatever supports you currently have and trying out AA. In sobriety, we have the option and the luxury to do something different instead of that which usually fails us.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: UK (England)
Posts: 2,782
Alcohol makes existing anxiety worse. If you are already feeling anxious and you combine that with drinking its bound to make you feel fragile and scared to go outside. I think you need to get a plan together for your recovery and stick to it, whether it be AA or something else. Going to a meeting and listening to the tapes sound like positive steps. You have said in your past posts that walking and eating healthily have made you feel better too so that's a good start also.
I agree about forgiving yourself. Feeling guilty seems to be something you spend a lot of time doing and its not productive or healthy. Do something that you enjoy that makes you feel good that doesn't involve drinking or anything destructive. I hope you feel better.
I agree about forgiving yourself. Feeling guilty seems to be something you spend a lot of time doing and its not productive or healthy. Do something that you enjoy that makes you feel good that doesn't involve drinking or anything destructive. I hope you feel better.
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