wt312000

Hello;

It's been two weeks since I woke up with a blinding hangover, an (again) angry wife, a car that had been off the road at some point, and a remorse like I'd not felt before. The good news is, of course, that I have not taken any alcohol at all. The 2nd best news is that this issue, my sobriety and why I must stop drinking, is still right off the tip of my nose. In the past, when I've tried to quit, by now that sense of urgency would have worn off, but I'm still worried to death that it's just a matter of time before I say, "what the hell was I worried about? Let's party."

I really, really want to go to a meeting, and then continue to go. I think that doing so will keep the importance of my sobriety (you know, because my family, health, and freedom aren't enough when I drink!!) right at the forefront.

I know I sound new to this, and I am, but I am still very ambivalent in terms of AA's methods vs. those of AVRT and also the SMART system. I am not a believer in any god; I just know that I cannot control myself when I ingest alcohol; that it has power over me, when I choose to drink. That first sip renders me helpless, and it is a matter of time before I hurt someone or myself, and/or continue a spiral that costs me and my family everything.

I have a doctor's appointment today, and I will discuss this with him. But I am going to find a meeting and go, dammit.

I'll tell you what, though. As a (former) binge drinker, 2 weeks without booze has really made me feel different physically. There is a clarity I haven't felt or seen in a long time. I'm sorry this is kind of a rambling post. I'm just scared about blowing this, and wanted to toss my thoughts out there.

SR is a great resource, and I'm glad I found it.

least

Welcome to SR from a fellow Buckeye!

hypochondriac

I was too, and still am. But when I first quit I thought I had to pick a side and stick with it. That didn't work with me and now I am glad about it, though at the time it caused me some anxiety. I went to AA for a while and learnt a lot there and made some friends, but ultimately the religious language put me off, even though I thought I had found a way to make it fit my atheist world view. I loved AVRT and SMART recovery but I felt that they lacked warmth and the camaraderie I found in AA. Regarding the finer details, it's a minefield, but I have benefited from learning about all of them and not taking sides. Get to whatever meeting you can and take from it what you can. Well done on two weeks

longbeachone

AA is not some corporation that will swallow you up and turn you into some kind of 12 stepping robot. Really it's just a bunch of people with the same problems that you have, that have found that coming together and hearing each other's stories somehow helps them stop drinking. You don't HAVE to do anything, if you don't want to...there are no rules, and you won't be turned away if you choose not to find your sober path the way that they recommend. My program of choice is Celebrate Recovery, but I've gone to many AA meetings...still do.

I was told that I had a toolbox to fill if I wanted to find recovery. In that toolbox went all of the things that helped me as I found sobriety...My sober tools. AA, this website, Celebrate Recovery, sober friends, great books on recovery...these were the things I stocked my toolbox with, and I pulled them out to use whenever the situation called for one or the other. So, start filling up your toolbox!

Petecrab

Welcome. Good post to. Amazing how much clarity and energy not drinking gives you!

Hevyn

We're glad you're here. Not being alone makes a huge difference, and we all understand. Well done on 2 weeks sober Your life will change in wonderful ways.

Amajorityofone

Congratulations!