A realization
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 264
A realization
Hello. My name is Andrea and I have recently admitted that I have a problem with alcohol.
I come from a family of drinkers, drinking everyday is an acceptable practice in my family and it's turning out no different for my husband and I.
We have always had a good time drinking together, and now that we have 2 small children we have started to drink more. For some reason I feel entitled to a drink (or 8) in the evening. It's nothing for us to polish off a large bottle of wine, or a case if beer in an evening when the kids are in bed.
My drinking escalated this summer during our summer vacation and I spent the better part of our family vacation wasted.
On Sunday I started drinking after lunch and got drunk quickly. I was playing with my son and suddenly was overcome by sadness and the realization that I would likely not remember much of this time due to the cloud of alcohol. My daughter wanted To go for a walk, so my husband took them out and I passed out on the couch, in the afternoon! On a Sunday afternoon! And then after supper we kept drinking.
I woke up with such resolve. It is apparent that I CAN'T drink. I can't just have a glass of wine, id rather have a bottle. Drinking for me has become about getting drunk. I just can't do t anymore.
My husband and I had a talk and it's the first time we have eer said out loud that we have a problem. Not just "we should cut down" or "we should only drink on weekends" but " we have a problem with drinking, and we have a problem with not drinking"
So here I am, one day sober.
Happy to make your acquaintance!
I come from a family of drinkers, drinking everyday is an acceptable practice in my family and it's turning out no different for my husband and I.
We have always had a good time drinking together, and now that we have 2 small children we have started to drink more. For some reason I feel entitled to a drink (or 8) in the evening. It's nothing for us to polish off a large bottle of wine, or a case if beer in an evening when the kids are in bed.
My drinking escalated this summer during our summer vacation and I spent the better part of our family vacation wasted.
On Sunday I started drinking after lunch and got drunk quickly. I was playing with my son and suddenly was overcome by sadness and the realization that I would likely not remember much of this time due to the cloud of alcohol. My daughter wanted To go for a walk, so my husband took them out and I passed out on the couch, in the afternoon! On a Sunday afternoon! And then after supper we kept drinking.
I woke up with such resolve. It is apparent that I CAN'T drink. I can't just have a glass of wine, id rather have a bottle. Drinking for me has become about getting drunk. I just can't do t anymore.
My husband and I had a talk and it's the first time we have eer said out loud that we have a problem. Not just "we should cut down" or "we should only drink on weekends" but " we have a problem with drinking, and we have a problem with not drinking"
So here I am, one day sober.
Happy to make your acquaintance!
Better when never is never
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Wisconsin near Twin Cities
Posts: 1,745
Thanks and welcome! I am an alcoholic father of two young daughters. I know only too well the special brand of shame and guilt that comes with being an alcoholic parent. Each night with another round of boozy kisses goodnight and each hungover morning where I know a potential day with the kids has already been blown adds to my guilt, depression, and sense of worthlessness.
It is good that you have talked with your husband and both have a common understanding. My wife barely drinks and doesn't understand why I don't simply "control myself".
It is good that you have talked with your husband and both have a common understanding. My wife barely drinks and doesn't understand why I don't simply "control myself".
Member
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: CAPE COD, MA
Posts: 1,020
Welcome Andrea. This can be a wonderful moment on a journey without alcohol in your system forcing you to behave in a way you don't want to. When I first went to AA I heard people talk about being " happy, joyous and free" and had no idea how to achieve that. It started with not picking up the FIRST drink and being honest with myself. The problem with a lot of us is a demon inside us saying it's ok, just have one, only have one after dinner and on and on, so try working against the demon with positive healthy thinking one day at a time. This site can be a wonderful place to share your feelings and get good advice.
BE WELL
BE WELL
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 15
Welcome! Best of luck to you. You've identified the issue, taking the next step in being able to rewire your thoughts and approaching trigger situations is next. I suggest you both go to counseling and stay avidly attentive to your own sobriety. Both my two exes and i would agree to make changes but end up sabotaging each other. Sometimes it's easier or harder getting sober together. It's a tricky beast. Reading these forums has helped considerably. Best of luck.
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