Darby85

Hi I'm new and just need someone to listen my addiction is a huge secret I never discuss

LDT

You came to the right place, Darby85. You're amongst friends and we're listening.

soberhawk

Welcome Darby85.

Darby85

Thank you, I've been trying so hard to get sober for a few years but my addiction has alway been swept under the rug and I've become something I never wanted to be a liar and a thief

visch1

Congratulations with this first step of getting help, there are many helpful and knowledgeable hands on these pages. The forum is certainly anonymous which is important to some. I tout the help that AA has given me and others over the years. The big thing is to open up and keep coming. BE WELL

Junegirl

Welcome to SR, Darby!

June

awuh1

Admitting you have been a liar and a thief sounds to me like a good first step in getting honest Darby. What have you tried and what's your plan to address your addiction?

Darby85

I've had an addiction to narcotic painkillers for a long time anyone have experience with that?

Darby85

Removing my access to them working on keeping myself away from them. My biggest issues is no one really knows that I have such a huge problem. And I often find myself refusing to tell peoe for fear they will hate me and look down on me. No to mention no one really takes this as a problem my parents just get angry when I try to talk to them Andy sweet adoring boyfriend tries but he has no experience with this stuff

Darby85

And my* not Andy

Pamel

Darby!!

awuh1

Ever consider going to a narcotics anonymous meeting? You will find people there who have beat the problem. Here is a link. http://www.soana.org/contact-us.html

Darby85

I have but I always convince myself other wise. Can I be treated or get sober with going into treatment? No one knows and is like it to stay that way?

Hevyn

Welcome to SR Darby. I think it'll really help you to be here - it's good to not feel alone with the problem. I never thought there'd be so many people feeling the same way I did. It helps to be able to discuss the problem with others who have been through it.

My problem is with alcohol, but I'm sure there are many others dealing with painkiller addiction. My good friend has been on them for years - following surgery. She refuses to see that they're destroying her. Thankfully, you see the danger and want to stop. Glad you are here.

awuh1

I cannot give you medical advise. A good first step might be to get honest with your doctor and explore the options.

Darby85

I have weird situation tho, I don't take them all the time but I do steal them often From family members and friends, I'm not concerned with physical detox all the problems I face are emotional and the urges to take them. I also tend to take so much in one sitting I get sick often. Idk how to handle this. Half the time I don't even like the way I feel after the intial high wears off. It's more become a way to feel happy and good. Because I suffer from sever depression and my doctor will not listen to me and ironically I don't want a bunch of other pills. I know this makes no sense! And many if my family suffer from addiction but they get treated like freaks

awuh1

Makes sense to me. Consider going to a mental health professional for the depression. I know it will take some courage, but also consider calling and speaking with the person at the narcotics anonymous office (the number is in the link within my above post). Just talk.

Darby85

Yea that's why I joined here I know I have a problem and need to fix it I'm just so scared to be found out! Any one else have that anxiety when the got sober? Like if people know ill be labeled a junkie and druggie

cleaninLI

Darby,
You are not alone. There are many of us who abuse painkillers. We have done the same thing. We have lied to our family and friends and we have stolen from them as well. Welcome to SR. There are a lot of threads in our substance abuse forum that you could read and a lot of support. Feel free to post as often as you like.

Darby85

Thank you