vosborne

Hello.... I am a new comer, however I'm not the one that is trying to get help. My husband is the Alcoholic and is trying to quit on his own. Unfortunately, it is harder than he thought it would be. He's been drinking since he was 18 and he is 44 now. He gave in last night after 1 day of not drinking. I could tell he was trying hard not to give in but by 9:00 pm he threw in the towel and went straight for the Alcohol. I was reading that withdrawals can be very dangerous without going through a detox program, is this correct? His therapist said he will need professional help coming off Alcohol, and i guess he thought he could do it on his own. I'm afraid after last night he's not going to want to quit anymore. Is there any advice out there that someone would be able to give me to give to him?

mecanix

Hey vosborne ,
welcome to SR ..

Withdrawls can be dangerous , we are all different and react differently . It is best done under medical advice / supervision .

Here is a link to an informative sticky :- http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...at-we-did.html

A lot of people find giving up is one part of the solution , learning how to deal with the up's and downs of living without drinking is the other part and requires some work , be that AA , AVRT , Rational recovery
Heres a link to a thread listing some of them , http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...formation.html

You will also find some support here in the newcomers area and the friends and family section, as it must be a tough thing for you to deal with

He's lucky to have you on his side

Bestwishes, m

least

I would suggest he see his doctor for help in getting safely thru the w/d. Meds can be given to prevent seizures and DTs. Have him see a doctor pronto.

hypochondriac

Tell him to have an honest chat with his doctor and see what they suggest. If he wants to do it with as little disruption as possible there are options. You don't always have to do an inpatient detox. There are mental and physical elements to addiction and really they have to be tackled all at the same time. AVRT really helped me. Maybe a few books on the subject would help (there's an excellent list in the stickies), or ask him how he'd feel about AA or SMART meetings... x

visch1

Good advice above especially about medical attention along with being honest with himself and the doctor. Usually the answer is I only have 1 or 2, what pints or quarts? AA works if we work it, many "don't like it" because our recovery is helped by us looking at and acknowledging/working on the reasons we drank. We recognize that fear, loneliness, anger, feelings etc are parts of our makeup that got us to this stage of escaping. At this point a lot run saying many negative comments and rationalizations about the program. I might suggest Al Anon as a salvation for you. BE WELL

RyanKelly

From a person who went through withdrawals, delirium tremens, and seizures: please, please, please get medical attention for your husband before trying to stop the alcohol. Going cold turkey for a person who has been drinking for a long time is asking for nothing but trouble. All the best to you and him!

vosborne

Thanks so much to all of you.... the advice given, is very helpful and greatly appreciated especially coming from the blessed souls that has gone through such pains and lived through it.

hypochondriac

Let us know how you get on vosborne. And don't forget the friends and family forum if you are finding things hard x

Sasha4

If he has been drinking a long time, its probably best not to start getting too carried away with stopping altogether.

For some people, they are advised to keep drinking until they can be detoxed by medics somewhere safe.

You can be left with some life changing injuries if you do not detox in a safe way. There are cardiovascular side effects, threat of having a stroke etc etc.

A few more days drinking might be worth it until you can get professional help.

You sound like a lovely, lovely lady and wife, but this is not your job to sort out as much as you might want to.
It is a job for a doctor, counsellor or AA to do.

However I am sure that your love, care and support will go a long way in helping your husband.

Don't forget friends and family section. Lots of wise people who have lived like you for years and years.

I truly do wish you the best XXXX

Dee74

Welcome vosborne

I think it's always a good idea to see a Dr, so do suggest that.

I also think if he can't make a day he may have to bite the bullet and redefine his plan and actually reach out for some help.

The link mechanix posted is a good overview of most of the recovery programmes around.

I think tho, you need to make sure this is his idea and he's the one doing the looking around and the researching and the asking for help.

It needs to be what he wants. It won't work any other way.

D