July2413

I just got back from a few days away. There was a lot of celebrating and I checked in on here on Tuesday night but by the time I got on on Wednesday I was just too tired to type anything on my ipad. I read a few things though and I didn't feel too tempted.

Tonight was more difficult. We had a big celebration today and in the midst of everything I was enjoying because I was sober, I was thinking about how nice it would be to get changed when I got home and have a glass of wine, talk to my friends, and get a good night sleep. However, I was able to remind myself that it never goes that way - its a bottle, no sleep, and panic.

Anyway, I feel like I'm getting my life back. Today I felt like myself in a way I haven't in a long time. I felt alive and capable and free. I felt like I could be generous, think of others, offer something. It felt amazing.

When I got home some of my roommates were drinking but the temptation was fleeting. The smell is still bothering me more than watching them drink it. But I felt content to drink my tea while they had their glasses of wine and just accept that if I want to feel all the things I wrote above then I can't drink - not one - not ever.

TexasMichael

Congratulations on staying sober, July2413!

Drinking tea in the evening is much more relaxing and satisfying than having a hangover in the morning.

Nuudawn

Nice work...especially on playing that romantic glass of wine all the way through! Was always a bad romance for me as well...blackouts, drunk texts, facebook posts..the ever present, gnawing shame that darkened my days.

July2413

Facebook is a great incentive to quit... It's amazing the things you think are funny until the morning! Glad I don't have to worry.

After I wrote last night a friend called because she needed someone to talk to and I was able to be there for her. If I had the first drink I would have been not use to her at all. I'm so happy that I was able to be present for her. Much better than a glass of wine!!!!!

least

Good for you on staying sober despite temptation.

bloss

Glad you thought through where the first drink would you, stay strong

Mizzuno

Great work. Being able to be there for people is an amazing feeling. Keep up the good work

LadyBlue0527

Funny now too to look back, not so funny then.

My morning ritual:
1. Open eyes, pounding headache
2. First thought, what did I do, what did I say, who did I say or do it to and......

Did I post anything on Facebook??????

Ugh, knowing full well that if you awoke later than the rest of the world, which was always the case, that people would have seen things already before you could delete them.

Soooooooooooo glad that no longer happens!

Eleni58

Kudos to you for your ability to be around others who were drinking! I don't think I have arrived at that place yet....

secretary

I guess we all did the drunk facebook and texts and calls. OMG isn't modern technology great!?! I was horrified to find out what I did the night before. That and the blackouts. The blackouts started scaring me. I can't go back to that. Way to go July!!!