not sure what day this is
quat
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: terra (mostly)firma
Posts: 4,823
not sure what day this is
Wednesday night was last time I drank to not sure how /when I made it to bed state. Thursday was bad with panic and anxiety, realized that the guilt and anxiety had become almost routine on waking, but it was real bad.
Searched causes and self diagnosis made me think I had reached the phase of dependence and scared me crapless. Friday had 8 beers throughout day in a preemptive manner to handle mild shakiness and such,it didn't feel like 'drinking', waited till Saturday night and had 1 and a half and didn't want or feel like needed anymore. Sunday felt pretty good walked at night , this morning back to anxiety but not crushing , normal?
Searched causes and self diagnosis made me think I had reached the phase of dependence and scared me crapless. Friday had 8 beers throughout day in a preemptive manner to handle mild shakiness and such,it didn't feel like 'drinking', waited till Saturday night and had 1 and a half and didn't want or feel like needed anymore. Sunday felt pretty good walked at night , this morning back to anxiety but not crushing , normal?
Anxiety is extremely normal. Anyone who's been a hard drinker for a long time is probably going to have a few days at least of anxiety when they quit. That's going to happen even if you slow/taper down. Something's apt to kick in after that last drink is out of the system.
One of the nice things about sobriety is having gone through that initial stage, I never have to go through it again, ever. With dependence it's something assured to continue to keep happening with the real likelihood of it getting worse and worse each time. Food for thought.
Where do you see yourself going from here? In terms of drinking. Is this the point of quitting or yet undecided? Whichever it is, you've got us here.
One of the nice things about sobriety is having gone through that initial stage, I never have to go through it again, ever. With dependence it's something assured to continue to keep happening with the real likelihood of it getting worse and worse each time. Food for thought.
Where do you see yourself going from here? In terms of drinking. Is this the point of quitting or yet undecided? Whichever it is, you've got us here.
quat
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: terra (mostly)firma
Posts: 4,823
I am going to stop for good.
I guess I want to know if it is alright to just concentrate on not starting, I think the anxiety is associated with knowing the issues I have to deal with, some of the reasons I drank to numb away, can be I guess waited to deal with, right now I think I just want to get time under my belt sober before I jump into the fire and deal with those.
I know I want someone to give me an excuse to not have to deal with them, but is it really alright to just wait a little, is it ok to just get through the everyday stuff and plan to confront bigger demons , or is that just more excuses , a little rattled, but I don't want to drink tonight. So that is probably correct, huh, just don't drink tonight, rambling sorry
I guess I want to know if it is alright to just concentrate on not starting, I think the anxiety is associated with knowing the issues I have to deal with, some of the reasons I drank to numb away, can be I guess waited to deal with, right now I think I just want to get time under my belt sober before I jump into the fire and deal with those.
I know I want someone to give me an excuse to not have to deal with them, but is it really alright to just wait a little, is it ok to just get through the everyday stuff and plan to confront bigger demons , or is that just more excuses , a little rattled, but I don't want to drink tonight. So that is probably correct, huh, just don't drink tonight, rambling sorry
The only way I know to do this is one day at a time. Deal with today what you have to but most important, don't drink. Each day it will get easier and each day you deal with the day you are on. We are all here for you. You have made the right decision. I don't want to ever deal with the first week again, so I will keep on doing one day at a time. I am proud of the decision you have made. Keep up the good work.
I think it's not only alright, but wise to do things that way. I think making the conviction not to drink is good in the beginning, but sobriety is only ever made in small, immediate choices and victories. Especially in the beginning there's no sense or usefulness in going beyond what's right in front of you.
Just don't drink tonight. That is exactly the best strategy.
All the best! We're all in your corner.
Just don't drink tonight. That is exactly the best strategy.
All the best! We're all in your corner.
quat
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: terra (mostly)firma
Posts: 4,823
am at work keeping checking in, have to keep putting on my sunglasses after reading comments highly emotional right now, not something I usually experience , thanks to everyone for just being here, think I am going to 'use' you people for awhile
quat
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: terra (mostly)firma
Posts: 4,823
its alittle after 10 pm local here, typical monday night still doin a little office work after daughter in bed dishes done, getting ready to fend off the beast when it would have me believe that since i can stop for days(ha ha), that i deserve a reward, jokes on it!
feeling strong ready for that creep
feeling strong ready for that creep
I am doing that... I decided it was too early to deal with the issues and stay off the booze.. So I decided on concentrating on not drinking only.. Freak the issues they will be dealt with once I am strong with a couple months of sobriety under my belt.. Drinking is not an option... The rest can wait... Heal .. Eat well.. Sleep well... Get strong!
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