Shakota

I have tried many alternatives for pain management before accepting defeat and agreeing to go on narcotics, I did not try acupuncture simply because I know that I would never be able to lay still and allow someone to stick needles all over my body, just thought of it gives me the heebie jeebies *shutter* I had asked my doctor once about patches and time release medications because I was at one point hoping to return to work and was not wanting to be a zombie all the time or be high all day long, it tends to make it hard focus lol. When all of this started I was originally in nursing school and had to give it up when I knew that I was never going to be able to be on my feet for 15 hours a day 5 to 6 days a week. So then I went back to my original work in data entry thinking that sitting at a desk working at a computer would be better. I can't walk or stand for a long period of time, like for more than 30 minutes at a time before neck starts to kill me, and even with pain medication my pain level quickly reaches a level of 6 to 7 on a scale of 1-10. So, I thought sitting would be better...I was wrong. I can't sit at a desk an stare at a computer screen for more than an hour at a time before my level (even with medication) is out of control. So I had asked my doctor about about time release medications or a patch, and he didn't want to put me on anything like that, he feels that they don't work as well. So, I ended up losing my job, my boss didn't like the fact that I had to take a break and get up and move every hour or so, plus if I was working, my doctor wanted me to alternate between ice packs and heating pads every hour. On top of that, my boss didn't like the fact that I was drugged up. I was very careful and I never over used my medication at work, in fact I tried not to use my meds at work. My boss ended up firing me because it was just too much of a hassle. My doctor later told me it wasn't a good idea for me to work anyways, that even just typing, the constant movement of just my fingers would aggravate my neck, since I have so many pinched nerves. He was right too, it was impossible to keep my pain level down and under control when I was at work. Even at home I have to be very careful when I am on the computer and take a lot of breaks because it really does aggravate my neck. So that is the bad thing about this, I really hate feeling so powerless and being at the mercy of my doctor and not really feeling like I have a say in any of it.

I had not thought of going to counseling. That is actually a really good idea as well, to be able to talk to someone and get help working through what I am feeling. The feelings of shame and guilt, also what is causing me to misuse my medications. I know that most times misuse is caused by trying to escape some underlying emotion or problem. So maybe talking to a professional would be a good a path to go down. I don't know why I hadn't thought of that earlier. That is really good advice, thank you so much for that.

deeker

No offense taken whatsoever. I don't get offended easy. I just want you to find your way. I cannot label anyone an addict but myself. Regardless if you go to NA or not I just want you to find your way. It is my route but I also rely on the Lord, my faith and the bible.

There are other routes to recovery. And coming to SR is one of them. I wish you the best and I will be praying that the thoughts which are the most troublesome will eventually settle down but I admire you getting honest with hubby and putting your meds in his possession. God Bless!

Lyoness

I'm glad the counseling idea resonated with you.

As far as acupuncture goes, there are forms of it that don't use needles! There is one form called non-insertion and another where they use lasers instead of needles. They also use herbal medicines and a variety of treatments besides using the needles. So it still might be something worth checking out. The last time I went, I had to have some drive me home because I was so relaxed, it was amazing!

LDT

I've never tried this before, but I'm interested in and have been reading up on the Japanese practice of Reiki Healing. You might also want to Google it.

Shakota

well that is cool! I didn't know that, I might just check it out. One question though, is that something that is covered by insurance? If not, is it very expensive? With me not being able to work and my husband being the only one working, we have a very tight budget. But if I can find a way to try it out I would definitely be interested in trying it out!

I do a lot of meditating and relaxation techniques to help keep myself relaxed so my neck muscles don't seize up on me. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. I also am always reading stuff on natural remedies you around your kitchen and house that you can use to help with chronic pain. If my pain level isn't too high they work, but when it is out of control, I have no choice but to reach for the medications....I just have to take it one day at a time

LDT

Shakota, I wish I knew more about Reiki, but I really can't advise you on whether insurance covers it or not. All I know is what I've read, and also heard from a couple of people that were considering becoming Reiki healers. There are some YouTube videos available if you'd like to check those out.

Mistical

My father has degenerative disk disease and use to be living in a complete haze from pain pills and eventually ended up overdosing on Soma. Luckily he was ok but it was terrifying. He stopped taking all meds but unfortunately has turned to alcohol for his pain management. I don't know what pill addiction is like but I have seen what this condition does to people and I hope doctors can eventually find ways to treat you guys pain without such strong pills! I actually became a massage therapist to learn how to help my dad and it does provide temporary relief for him! I'm glad you found the site! You will get a lot of support here!

Nuudawn

Hi Shakota. Welcome. You're situation is a difficult one. I've read through the thread and all the while was thinking of the pursuit of "alternate remedies" other than pharmaceuticals. Others have echoed that here as well. At one moment, I couldn't help but note what appeared to me as "addiction" obstacles that we all face. Your hesitancy about acupuncture...dismissing an unknown possibility based on fear or discomfort etc. I think in dealing with addiction we have to be "open" to any answer. Just a thought I had...might be wrong...but it did give me pause.

The part I quoted is something that also struck me....as when my therapist discussed with me the cycle of addiction...she suggested there were many points along the road where we can pause and circumvent the relapse building. If we do not, there comes a point WE CANNOT STOP ourselves and we will use. Something about what you said there...reminded me of that also. I'm hoping you are able to find strategies and mechanisms that will prevent the pain from accelerating to a point you have no option but the pill. I'm sorry I'm not much help..just things you said...made me ponder things..

Shakota

One of the things that I have that help me the most in distracting me from my pain is writing. Writing has always been an amazing outlet for me, I write anything from poetry to short stories. Actually right now I am writing a book about my life. I haven't had an easy one and I was adopted at the age of 11 by my foster parents that got me when I was 8 years old. My mom (the mother who adopted me) passed away a year ago in June, she begged me for years to write a book about my life. As hard as it is to dredge up my past and the abuse I suffered I am doing it. Anyways, its a great outlet for me, so that is one of the things I am using to help myself. Plus writing on here and the support and responses I am getting from all of you is really helping. My poor husband, he has spent more time comforting me and drying my tears today than he has in the 5 years we have been together. I feel bad that I am putting all of this on him but he keeps telling me not to worry about it that he doesn't mind and that is what he is here for. I have also started a little journal about how I am doing each day...along with writing down a lot of inspirational quotes so when I feel like I can't do it, I open up the book and read these quotes. Plus I still have all the cards tacked up all over the place that I wrote down inspirational quotes on.

At this point it isn't about getting off the pain medication it is about getting it under control and taking it as prescribed. Yes, I want to find alternate methods to help with the pain so I don't have to take so many, so maybe I only have to take 1 or 2 a day instead of 3 or 4. That is what is going on today is I am just so frustrated that I failed yesterday, I wanted so badly to be good, to do well and show myself and my husband that I could do it and then that spinal headache kicked my butt and ruined it all.

Another big fear I have is on Tuesday I have to have two teeth pulled. The pain is going to be bad and I am afraid I am not going to be able to stick to the prescribed amount. For one, the way I have to sit in the dentist chair is going to be uncomfortable. Then the force of the pulling, plus the teeth are the very back teeth, on the top, one on each side...so that right there is going to cause a serious headache. So next week is going to be a really hard week. But Tuesday is going to be the worst. My husband said he is going to leave out extra meds in a separate spot for me and if I need them I can call him and he will tell me where they are so I can take them. I am just really worried about it, I hate the dentist as it is, luckily my dentist is awesome, but still, two teeth pulled is going to be painful, on top of my regular pain....It will be a long day.

Nuudawn

I think that's an excellent focus...it's progress, not perfection : ) That's what it's all about. I wouldn't beat myself up to much...you're fighting and that's what's important. I also think you're right on the money with the writing...it s so very cathartic.

Shakota

Thank you Nuudawn, I think so too. I will never stop fighting...one thing I have always been is a fighter and a survivor. I am not going to give up on this...my determination has always been my number one strongest quality, in fact, that is what my husband has always said he loves the most about me....so I am going to pull up my big girl panties and kick some ass!

Nuudawn

Love it : )