I still have my job, family, wife, life, health, freedom
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Nunyah, California
Posts: 132
I still have my job, family, wife, life, health, freedom
But I did f**k up some important projects that were going on at work with my addiction. Even though all people really know is that I was "sick" and had to go to the hospital for awhile, it caused me to drop the ball on some very prestigious stuff I was involved in at my work.
I'm dealing with some regrets today in relation to an email that I had to deal with, that was a side effect of me dropping said ball(s). I can't help but think that people suspect my "sickness" was in the end just me f**king up, being a screwup, and that in the end I'm just not someone to trust with important projects.
Addiction sucks.
52 days today.
I'm dealing with some regrets today in relation to an email that I had to deal with, that was a side effect of me dropping said ball(s). I can't help but think that people suspect my "sickness" was in the end just me f**king up, being a screwup, and that in the end I'm just not someone to trust with important projects.
Addiction sucks.
52 days today.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,443
Hi Dr S
Unfortunately there's not much you can do about what people think.
Reputations are not immutable tho - 7 years ago I was the neighbourhood bum, the guy everyone would cross the road to avoid.
If I can get past that, you can get past this
D
Unfortunately there's not much you can do about what people think.
Reputations are not immutable tho - 7 years ago I was the neighbourhood bum, the guy everyone would cross the road to avoid.
If I can get past that, you can get past this
D
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Bay Area CA
Posts: 142
Hey DrSober - Congrats on 52 days!!!
I think I am catching my problem right before my work was about to suffer. I think I am lucky in that way as my job is VERY important to my family.
I would like to think that the "new you" can change any impressions your co-workers may have of you (if they have any at all).
Either way - the best thing you can do is take care of yourself and work hard at your place of employment - usually that is rewarded.
Good luck!!!
I think I am catching my problem right before my work was about to suffer. I think I am lucky in that way as my job is VERY important to my family.
I would like to think that the "new you" can change any impressions your co-workers may have of you (if they have any at all).
Either way - the best thing you can do is take care of yourself and work hard at your place of employment - usually that is rewarded.
Good luck!!!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: East Coast, The States
Posts: 12,162
I have found that the more quickly you hold your head high and move on, the more quickly others forget and focus on how you're behaving now.
I had profound shame and when I quit I knew I had to adopt that philosophy or I'd drown in shame and never succeed. So I have just refused, absolutely refused, to let that shame rent space in my head and as I continued to behave respectably, productively, concientously and honorably, pretty soon people seemed to think I was always behaving that way.
People have short memories, especially in the workplace. After all don't they alsays say: what have you done for me lately? The accomplishments done or not done in the past fade, as you wow them with what you've done today.
Anyway seems to have worked for me and I'm 17 and 1/2 months sober now.
A big congratulations on your sobriety! That is so fantastic and it just gets better.
I had profound shame and when I quit I knew I had to adopt that philosophy or I'd drown in shame and never succeed. So I have just refused, absolutely refused, to let that shame rent space in my head and as I continued to behave respectably, productively, concientously and honorably, pretty soon people seemed to think I was always behaving that way.
People have short memories, especially in the workplace. After all don't they alsays say: what have you done for me lately? The accomplishments done or not done in the past fade, as you wow them with what you've done today.
Anyway seems to have worked for me and I'm 17 and 1/2 months sober now.
A big congratulations on your sobriety! That is so fantastic and it just gets better.
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Boston, MA.
Posts: 1,756
Originally Posted by DrSober 
I can't help but think that people suspect my "sickness" was in the end just me f**king up, being a screwup, and that in the end I'm just not someone to trust with important projects.
Addiction sucks.
52 days today.
Addiction sucks.
52 days today.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Washington, DC
Posts: 987
Originally Posted by EternalQ
I have found that the more quickly you hold your head high and move on, the more quickly others forget and focus on how you're behaving now.
I had profound shame and when I quit I knew I had to adopt that philosophy or I'd drown in shame and never succeed. So I have just refused, absolutely refused, to let that shame rent space in my head and as I continued to behave respectably, productively, concientously and honorably, pretty soon people seemed to think I was always behaving that way.
People have short memories, especially in the workplace. After all don't they alsays say: what have you done for me lately? The accomplishments done or not done in the past fade, as you wow them with what you've done today.
Anyway seems to have worked for me and I'm 17 and 1/2 months sober now.
A big congratulations on your sobriety! That is so fantastic and it just gets better.
I had profound shame and when I quit I knew I had to adopt that philosophy or I'd drown in shame and never succeed. So I have just refused, absolutely refused, to let that shame rent space in my head and as I continued to behave respectably, productively, concientously and honorably, pretty soon people seemed to think I was always behaving that way.
People have short memories, especially in the workplace. After all don't they alsays say: what have you done for me lately? The accomplishments done or not done in the past fade, as you wow them with what you've done today.
Anyway seems to have worked for me and I'm 17 and 1/2 months sober now.
A big congratulations on your sobriety! That is so fantastic and it just gets better.
Also, remember that we don't always know exactly what others are thinking even if we are convinced we do. A lot of our shame and our paranoia are self-produced and it's kind of second nature for drunks to assume the worst in most situations. Just because you're not drinking anymore doesn't mean that sort of thinking fades away immediately. Hang in there and, as Eternal Q says, just hold your head high and keep moving forward. Everything can change no matter how bad it seems. That is one constant I am sure of
You're doing awesome!
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