tonyafay38

Hi... My name is Tonya and I am married to a Meth Addict going on 15 years now. We don't live together at this time due to the fact that my husband spent all our money and we lost our home, so he is homeless and I live with my dad and our 3 children. It is a hard life to bare. I have a lot of stress. My husband degrades me and blames me, he calls me a *****, ****, bitch, snitch, he makes me feel worthless, he has hit me, push me around. He does all this to me and I still want him, I want to hurt him but I still want him and I feel that if I am feeling this way, I must have lost my mind to be so stupid to want someone that treats me like ****. I do the calling, chasing, begging and pleading for a change in him, for the better. I am just miserable. I am tired of being alone, I am unhappy. Some days I just cant seem to function...

Hollyanne

Hi Tonya,
There is a Friends and Family forum here.
There are many people at different stages who can help you.
No, you are not alone, and that is why it is absolutely fantastic that you have found this site.
You will get lots of support here.
Welcome.
Try to minimize contact with the husband for now.
Living with an addict is not healthy.
Now is your time to begin to heal.

least

Please take some time for yourself. Your husband sounds like a dangerous person. Violence is never acceptable. I understand your still loving him but you deserve a lot better. I too recommend the friends and family forum. Lots of insight there.

Dee74

welcome Tonya

I'm really sorry to read about your situation - I agree with the others that violence is never acceptable.

This is not your fault - and you deserve better.

You'll find a lot of support here, and in the Family and Friends forums tho - you're not alone

Have you given any thought to what you might do to look after yourself and look after your own safety?

There are some great tips and links here that may help?
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...out-abuse.html

D

Sasha4

You deserve a lot better than this.

I hope you can find some support like al-anon.

Your husband is a bully.
Physical abuse is not acceptable.
Verbal abuse is not acceptable.

He is setting a disgusting example to your children.

Why not read and post over in the friends and family section.
There are so many wise people there who can help you make sense of this situation.

Perhaps every time you are tempted to call him, come here instead and write down what you are feeling.

I really do wish you the best
xx