Dark place
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Raleigh nc
Posts: 1
Dark place
This is my first attempt at seeking any help for my drinking. It is controlling my life and destroying my family. I'm tired of being worn out and hung over 90 percent of the time. It is exhausting! Yet I keep repeating the cycle day after day. The black outs where I try to piece the night before together are more than I can bear anymore. My friends say just drink a few drinks and stop. Tried that and failed. No I have to finish the entire bottle of vodka. I don't even know how to begin living each day without the numbing effect I get from alcohol. I work full time and have 3 children and a husband. I can stay sober the days I work bc I work 12 hours shifts and most days longer. So all I have time to do is go home and go to sleep. Of course that first day back to work I am usually hung over from the night before. I used to enjoy life and various hobbies and activities with my children. Now I'm just a hung over drunk most days living with the guilt and shame it brings. So I am going to try to get my life back. I yearn for the person I used to be. I look in the mirror and she a stranger. Thanks for listening and sharing your stories. They are an inspiration to me!
Guest
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Canada
Posts: 4,580
Love your name...Grace
1. Seemingly effortless beauty or charm of movement, form, or proportion.
2. A characteristic or quality pleasing for its charm or refinement.
3. A sense of fitness or propriety.
a. A disposition to be generous or helpful; goodwill.
b. Mercy; clemency.
5. A favor rendered by one who need not do so; indulgence.
6. A temporary immunity or exemption; a reprieve.
a. Divine love and protection bestowed freely on people.
b. The state of being protected or sanctified by the favor of God.
c. An excellence or power granted by God.
9. A short prayer of blessing or thanksgiving said before or after a meal.
I could see where I used to be in your post...my life had become so very, very small. Drinking, sleeping, eating, working...that was it really.
Stick around...recovery is simply reclaiming your life..enlarging it..making your life something again..something of value.
Bright blessings...
1. Seemingly effortless beauty or charm of movement, form, or proportion.
2. A characteristic or quality pleasing for its charm or refinement.
3. A sense of fitness or propriety.
a. A disposition to be generous or helpful; goodwill.
b. Mercy; clemency.
5. A favor rendered by one who need not do so; indulgence.
6. A temporary immunity or exemption; a reprieve.
a. Divine love and protection bestowed freely on people.
b. The state of being protected or sanctified by the favor of God.
c. An excellence or power granted by God.
9. A short prayer of blessing or thanksgiving said before or after a meal.
I could see where I used to be in your post...my life had become so very, very small. Drinking, sleeping, eating, working...that was it really.
Stick around...recovery is simply reclaiming your life..enlarging it..making your life something again..something of value.
Bright blessings...
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: NY
Posts: 227
Hi Grace,
I definitely know what you mean. I hated trying to piece together what i did the night before. Not wanting to ask the question because if would reveal what I didn't know. Agreeing and playing along because I had no idea what the person was talking about. That was a big part of me realizing there was a problem and beginning to think about changing my life. I am still trying and relatively new to this but seeing small improvements that I like.
The one thing I keep reading that really resonates with me is the idea that none of the issues or problems I have would be solved by drinking, only put off for a day and probably made worse.
This is a great site for support and knowledge.
I definitely know what you mean. I hated trying to piece together what i did the night before. Not wanting to ask the question because if would reveal what I didn't know. Agreeing and playing along because I had no idea what the person was talking about. That was a big part of me realizing there was a problem and beginning to think about changing my life. I am still trying and relatively new to this but seeing small improvements that I like.
The one thing I keep reading that really resonates with me is the idea that none of the issues or problems I have would be solved by drinking, only put off for a day and probably made worse.
This is a great site for support and knowledge.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Clifton
Posts: 243
Welcome.. I am new here as well and feel exactly the same way... Trust me you are not alone at all... This is the beginning of recovery and my only advice to you is to take one day at the time ... That is how I am coping with the shock of being sober and not waking up hungover. It feels good but I have to say this... Stay away from triggers and people that drink..
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Bay Area CA
Posts: 142
Welcome Grace - I'm a newbie myself and have found the support here priceless.
It's staggering to me - every time I refresh the screen it seems there is someone new introducing themselves.
I honestly had no idea how many people are struggling with the same problem I'm having. Guess I just had my head in the sand.
Good luck on taking control - look forward to reading more about you!
It's staggering to me - every time I refresh the screen it seems there is someone new introducing themselves.
I honestly had no idea how many people are struggling with the same problem I'm having. Guess I just had my head in the sand.
Good luck on taking control - look forward to reading more about you!
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