FINALLY made it through an entire day
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Northern Utah
Posts: 920
FINALLY made it through an entire day
After months, years even, of getting sober for short periods, and then bingeing for days, I have reverted to daily drinking. I make it to work most of the time - in the past 3 months I have been "sick" twice - and drink about 3-4 cocktails in the evenings, more on the weekends.
I keep telling myself I am going to quit, and keep finding excuses not to.
Last night after work, I went to the gym. After a good workout, I would often tell myself that a couple drinks would be "ok." Last night, I thought the opposite and came straight home. In spite of my husband being kind of a jerk, which would normally have sent me straight to the liquor store to be able to numb the pain, I stayed sober.
What's different?
1. I've been using CBT tools and journaling to handle emotional issues that would normally make me want to drink
2. I'm focusing on making MY life better for ME, not to make my marriage better or make work better.
3. I'm reminding myself that I DESERVE to be healthy and happy. I have a tough time with this.
4. I asked a sober coworker for help, advice and support.
I pray for another day, because even one day of sobriety has eluded me for a few months.
I keep telling myself I am going to quit, and keep finding excuses not to.
Last night after work, I went to the gym. After a good workout, I would often tell myself that a couple drinks would be "ok." Last night, I thought the opposite and came straight home. In spite of my husband being kind of a jerk, which would normally have sent me straight to the liquor store to be able to numb the pain, I stayed sober.
What's different?
1. I've been using CBT tools and journaling to handle emotional issues that would normally make me want to drink
2. I'm focusing on making MY life better for ME, not to make my marriage better or make work better.
3. I'm reminding myself that I DESERVE to be healthy and happy. I have a tough time with this.
4. I asked a sober coworker for help, advice and support.
I pray for another day, because even one day of sobriety has eluded me for a few months.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Northern Utah
Posts: 920
Originally Posted by Dee74 
Good to see you back Lilac - I hope this is the start of something great for you 
D
D
I've been learning about the stages of change on my new job in mental health. I think maybe I've been lingering for a while in the "precontemplation" stage. I'm scared, but excited for what life COULD look like for me - more running and cycling events, establishing good friendships, tapping into my creative side...so much that I could do if I'd just put down the bottle.
I continue to do this cost-benefit analysis. The benefits of not drinking far outweigh the benefits of drinking.
I'm really excited to share this little success with my sober coworker. She's been sober for 16 years and has been a huge help in giving me tools to work through my emotional blocks.
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