First time
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Québec Canada
Posts: 46
First time
I found this site a few months ago, and read through a lot of postings and just today, I got the nerve to sign up. My spouse of 16 years is an alcoholic, but he still refuses to admit more than drinking a little more than the "common folk". What has made this so hard to admit to myself, is that he has never been abusive or mean, has not missed a day of work, doesn't go on binges for days on end, even tells me he loves me every day...but he hides alcohol, and lies about it....and has been doing so for at least 13 years. That's why I'm here.
Canine Welfare Advocate
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,962
So sorry for what brings you to SR. I am the alcoholic in my marriage, sober almost three years. So recovery is possible, but your husband has to want it. Sounds like it will have to get worse before it gets better.
While you are welcome to post here, we have a forum for friends and family of alcoholics. Lots of support there.
Friends and Family of Alcoholics - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
While you are welcome to post here, we have a forum for friends and family of alcoholics. Lots of support there.
Friends and Family of Alcoholics - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
I'm glad you joined us but sorry for the circumstances. 
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 11,481
Seconding the recommendation to give Alanon a try. Sometimes you need some face-to-face folks in addition to us here at SR.
Here is a link to their site. You'll see headings for general info, how to find a meeting, etc. http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/
There's a section in the Family and Friends forum on what Alanon is like, too, and here's that link. http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ings-like.html
Again, welcome, and please read as much as you can here; I learned a lot and found a lot of support. I hope you find the same.
And Ripper? My AH is the same as yours, not loud or violent or unemployed, but nevertheless an alcoholic, and it has devastated our relationship every bit as much as the yelling, blacking out, can't pay the bills kind...you are not alone in this.
Here is a link to their site. You'll see headings for general info, how to find a meeting, etc. http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/
There's a section in the Family and Friends forum on what Alanon is like, too, and here's that link. http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ings-like.html
Again, welcome, and please read as much as you can here; I learned a lot and found a lot of support. I hope you find the same.
And Ripper? My AH is the same as yours, not loud or violent or unemployed, but nevertheless an alcoholic, and it has devastated our relationship every bit as much as the yelling, blacking out, can't pay the bills kind...you are not alone in this.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Québec Canada
Posts: 46
Thank you all...My family dr has recommended Al-Anon for a while now...and I did start a few »spouses of alcoholics» meetings with a rehab facility in my home town but I stopped, it became too overwhelming and I just want a normal life sometimes...the »ostrich» in me just wants to take over and bury its head in the sand and then my AH does something stupid like hide a 40oz of vodka in the trunk of his car...
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