disco22

Yesterday was Day 6 for me. Day 6 was horrible for me. I didn't want to get out of bed. I didn't want to do anything, be anywhere, but I had to go to work at my second job. The job i had to work was at a fair, that's not the bad part, the fair had a beer garden. Guess where I had to setup for work....right next to the garden. I saw, I craved, I over came! I focused on my job and going home for a swim. I just kept reminding myself that I don't need this, I've come such a great distance in such a short time. Even when I got home i coulnd't get it out of my head, but once I hit that water I cleared my mind. I stopped THINKING! I focused on each stoke...each breath. I thought music was my serenity, but that is only one piece of my unorganized puzzle. My mind is still very fogged and confused, but I am still working on no THINKING. No matter how bad I didn't want to leave bed I am glad I had to!

Day 7- relaxing, keeping idle hands moving and preparing my body for tomorrow.

yukonm

Congratulations on 6 days.....it will get easier.

Bruce292

It sounds to me like you were quite strong today. Being stuck next to a beer garden on (I'm assuming) a hot day? That's rough. It sounds like swimming is an excellent thing to focus on for you. That's wonderful. It takes time for the mind to clear ... though there are times that I think mine never will ... I just do the best I can.

disco22

yukonm- Thank you!!!

Katt1825

A horrible day that ended in SUCCESS!!!!

Yay for you! my DOC isn't available at a grocery or fair, etc and I have so much respect that you could look right at it and walk away.

That's a victory and you should be proud.

least

Congrats on getting thru a rough spot.

yoohoo

You did amazingly well. What resolve... doe sthe drinking water help? Thats the first time Ive heard that. Im day 2...

wiscsober

whatever it takes...never give up

Nuudawn

You made it through Disco!! That's so awesome. I was at an outdoor music fest yesterday and I damn near didn't make it either. But I did...you did...wahoo. And you built up some sobriety muscle in the process. Nice work.

disco22

Bruce- yesterday was very hot and very tough and I felt weak until i got home and realized what I had really done. I have decided that swimming not only clears my mind, but gets my heart beating and my body moving. I'm not fighting my mind anymore, I've just decided to slow it down and shut it off. Thank you for your kind words and support!

disco22

THANK YOU everyone for the support!!!!

yoohoo- I don't know if drinking water worlds, but I have noticed my intake of water has increased. I do tend to drink water when I have an urge, I guess it's a way to trick my mind into thinking I am fullfilling my urge, because I am having a beverage.

Nuudawn- CONGRATS!!!! It's hard to enjoy stuff with those thoughts in mind (I've noticed that).

Bruce292

Exercise is a big part of maintaining my sobriety. Before I exercise the world can seem harsh, confusing, and above all frustrating. After exercise colors are softer, I feel relaxed and calm, and I just feel well. Sounds like swimming is very similar for you.

As for the mind clearing. Now that some time has passed my focus is returning. It took some time and some discipline. Things are going to be OK.

Keep at it and hang in there.

disco22

Bruce- I don't like exercise much, but swimming deffinately is becoming a huge part ofthis journey for me. I feel all of that before i jump in that pool. After my laps and I get out I feel... freed. I feel acomplished and I guess safe. Swimming is also helping me sleep. I've had trouble in the last couple days, but with swimming before bed has allowed me a better nights sleep.

I've learned how to focus at work...my biggest issue is when I am more idle, but I am learning.

I'm going to keep striving. Thank you...your words mean so much!

SnwFlower

Congrats on a successful day 6 disco!! Swimming sounds like a perfect diversion!