Day 1... Just another introduction
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Louisiana
Posts: 5
Day 1... Just another introduction
So here I am, apparently... I am not really sure where to begin. I guess with the basics. I had my last drink last night and as usual that 3 or 4 shots turned into my drinking a entire fifth of vodka. If I buy a 1/2 gallon the entire bottle is gone in 2 days.
This morning was different than all the morning-afters before. It's like I see things differently. I don't want to feel ashamed and guilt-ridden every morning when I wake up. I have a feeling that I can really do it this time and if I do have a slip up, even though I will do everything in my power to keep that from happening, there is always the option of dusting myself off and starting again from scratch.
My drinking started when I was in my 20's having had anxiety as long as I can remember. I self medicated I guess you can say. So about 15 years of drinking total. It became a problem in 2005 when I went though Hurricane Katrina. The past couple of years it has become completely unacceptable. I find myself blacking out and not remembering most of the previous day. The guilt I have makes me stay in my room because I do not want to see anyone because the shame is completely overwhelming.
I have lost relationships, family members, jobs and much more because of drinking. I am tired of it taking control of my life. I want MY control back. So, here I am feeling very confident that I can do this and hopefully, it will one day be a distant memory and a valuable lesson learned. I have learned that I can not simply cut back as I have NO self control when it comes to alcohol. The only way is complete and total abstinence.
I am looking forward to getting to know you all and have really enjoyed reading previous posts. It looks like I have found a great place for support, as I don't really have anyone that I can talk to about this kind of thing. Needless to say I am very appreciative to be here with people who understand.
Anyway, enough said... Thanks everyone!!
This morning was different than all the morning-afters before. It's like I see things differently. I don't want to feel ashamed and guilt-ridden every morning when I wake up. I have a feeling that I can really do it this time and if I do have a slip up, even though I will do everything in my power to keep that from happening, there is always the option of dusting myself off and starting again from scratch.
My drinking started when I was in my 20's having had anxiety as long as I can remember. I self medicated I guess you can say. So about 15 years of drinking total. It became a problem in 2005 when I went though Hurricane Katrina. The past couple of years it has become completely unacceptable. I find myself blacking out and not remembering most of the previous day. The guilt I have makes me stay in my room because I do not want to see anyone because the shame is completely overwhelming.
I have lost relationships, family members, jobs and much more because of drinking. I am tired of it taking control of my life. I want MY control back. So, here I am feeling very confident that I can do this and hopefully, it will one day be a distant memory and a valuable lesson learned. I have learned that I can not simply cut back as I have NO self control when it comes to alcohol. The only way is complete and total abstinence.
I am looking forward to getting to know you all and have really enjoyed reading previous posts. It looks like I have found a great place for support, as I don't really have anyone that I can talk to about this kind of thing. Needless to say I am very appreciative to be here with people who understand.
Anyway, enough said... Thanks everyone!!
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Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Canada
Posts: 4,580
and if I do have a slip up, even though I will do everything in my power to keep that from happening, there is always the option of dusting myself off and starting again from scratch./
Welcome! I think I felt much the same way you did the day I woke up with my last hangover. I made a decision I felt fairly confident about.
I quoted you above because I couldn't think of the future...any future relapse. My thinking stopped at "what will I do when I want to drink?". I made a list of alternatives to refer to if overwhelmed by the desire to drink. I'm 5 weeks in and haven't had to look at it yet.
Welcome! I think I felt much the same way you did the day I woke up with my last hangover. I made a decision I felt fairly confident about.
I quoted you above because I couldn't think of the future...any future relapse. My thinking stopped at "what will I do when I want to drink?". I made a list of alternatives to refer to if overwhelmed by the desire to drink. I'm 5 weeks in and haven't had to look at it yet.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Melbourne Australia.
Posts: 3,748
Welcome to the forum, as the old saying goes the longest journey begins with the first step.
Keep tuned in here and maybe find some supportive people out side in a group of some sort who can help you maintain your sobriety.
Keep tuned in here and maybe find some supportive people out side in a group of some sort who can help you maintain your sobriety.
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