ocpik1

So upset and mad at myself. Stayed sober for five weeks. For the past two weeks I have been right back at it and drank just about every night. Feel so crappy again. Haven't drank for the past two nights and really think I may need more support than willpower. Have been in denial for so many years that I have a problem but anytime I want to quit, I think after a few days or weeks that I can drink just "one time." Where do I go from here?

visch1

Lets see. You can acknowledge that if you don't pick up the first drink you don't have to TRY to get sober AGAIN. For some reason that fact seems to elude us alkys, probably because it's so simple. Now to get to the point of how not pick up, that's a continuing and interesting journey, lifetime also. BE WELL

instant

Going back to it when you feel good, or have a F$$k it moment is common. If you have not done so learn about AVRT/ rational recovery.

I am over two years. My addictive voice chimes in with some regularity. Having a stratergy to deal with it helps.

least

Staying sober means making changes in your life. What are you willing to do to make sure you don't drink again?

ocpik1

Thanks everyone. Made it a week again. I like the feeling of waking up clear and early. Most of the day I am happy to be sober. It is just that 5 to9 oclock period where I crave alcohol. It isn't overwhelming. Seems I do better not drinking at all because as soon as I have a few drinks, I continue the pattern for days. Going to a celebration tonight where there will be alcohol. I have to be there as it is a get together for my inlaws who both passed away last year. One good thing is that I am on meds for something else for a week that will make me sick if I drink. I still feel in my mind that if it wasn't for this, I would probably drink with the family tonight. How do you get over this social need to drink? I am fine during the day and have never drank while I work etc. Just the evenings and social times. Just want to get to the point where it doesn't even occur to me to have a beer or glass of wine. Sorry for the long rant.

Erratic

I take campral for my cravings, the first time i was on it i gave up for a year, this time around on it, it seems to be helping a little with the cravings. Maybe thats something u could ask about is what kind of medication there in helping with the cravings.

Good luck! xx

sugarbear1

It takes about 30 days to change a habit, 90 to make it stick well.....

360shoes

Hi oc,
I had that too at first. I noticed the urge hit at specific times for me. Mostly 5:00pm. If I could make it to 7. I was kind of in the clear.

It made sense to me since that is when I mostly started my drinking so I figured I just had a brain wire fused for that. I figured since I fused it, I had a good chance I could unfuse it. As long as I stopped feeding the pattern.

After awhile, it eased up. Then it came up as just a reaction to stress or a handful of emotions I didn't want to deal with or particularly like. That too got better with practice.

Just me but the more I just refused to go along with the thought the weaker the thoughts got. I don't know if it will pop up here and there for the rest of my life. Probably. It still has a shadow once in awhile.

I figure that my job now is to remind myself every day why I went through all that to begin with.

I had to just suck it up and refuse to start drinking again. In time, it got easier.