WhiteFeathers

ippochick, you are amazing. I haven't done 21 days. I picked up after a mere 18. Now I'm back on day 3. You're almost up to one month!!! Keep going, your daughter will be so proud of you.

mecanix

MMMMmmmm ice cream

m

fantail

This is drunk thinking! I do this too. But this is telling your own story from the point of view of others (or more accurately, your own perception of what others think).

One thing that many drunks have in common is that it's a way to be a secret mess. It helps us keep up appearances. We drown our feelings and our problems and think it's all OK as long as we keep our job, keep achieving, etc.

Your story is so much more nuanced than just "career woman" to "broken shell". You know that, and so do your loved ones. When you think to yourself that that's how they see you, that's inadvertently being condescending towards them. They know you, and they can handle you!

Success needs to be defined not just as what other people can see, but as the whole package.

An example for me is that I keep my bedroom horrifically messy, and the rest of my apartment very clean. I realize that this is a symptom of the ways I'm still sick. I'm working towards the day when I value myself enough to keep my bedroom clean for my own sake, rather than letting it be a mess because no one else sees it.

Anyway long winded way of saying you're doing exactly what you need to be doing to work towards that total-package success. Hang in there.

Junegirl

Thinking of you, ippochick. You're doing so great and I'm sure things will continue to improve with your family.

Cyberhugs

June

Dee74

be gentle on yourself ippo - it might feel like a decade but it's only been 3 weeks - early recovery is a tumultuous time...not only for us and often for our loved ones too.

Things will get better - you finished the day in a great way...get used to that

D