Weasel1966

The 4th of july. An uncomfortable holiday for me always. From memories of a lonely childhood to that of the tainted claps of fake thunder.

The sounds of fireworks makes my heart beat quicker.... Not for the noise or spectacular colors... But for the ache and still the draw that an addict has to his love.

I have spent many a 4th walking the street with my head ringing looking for the next thing to come upon. Never wanting the party to end.

I learned a lot this last years and a half. How to feel that heart beat without getting light headed about it. I want fireworks to mean something else. I want them to bring milestones of sobriety.

This is my SECOND sober 4th. Now I have had issues in-between but that aside this 4th I will sober. My stumble last week has given me some real motivation. Not going back there.

So I have made plans with a sober couple to come over to cook out. Wash the car is on the agenda. Spend time with my SR friends.

Just happy and humble in my sobriety today. Waking up feeling good never ever gets old. No matter how time I have.

BabyJane

Right there with you. The Fourth of July used to mean "party" for me and nothing more... Have done a few sober ones now and I appreciate it more. I am glad to live in America, even with our difficulties as a nation we are still lucky to live in a relatively free country. Hope you enjoy the celebrations and glad we will both be sober!

Nonsensical

Amen, Brother.

Happy Independence Day.

mecanix

I'd love to visit Mt Rushmore sometime .

The JFK memorial at Runnymede was given to the federal US government but I think it's still Queenys' soverinty , it's about the nearest i can get to the USA .. I might come visit

There is a copy of the statue of Lincon in chicago, in parliment square to celebrate 100 years of peace between our countries way back when , strange we did'nt do something for 200 years or has something happend no one has told me about in the last centuary ?

Washington looks over trafalgar square from infront of the national library (thanks Verginia) .

Have a nice one y'all , m

Nonsensical

Nothing compares to Admiral Lord Nelson's dominating presence over Trafalgar Square. This old sailor was all kinds of inspired when I saw that.

Anna

I'm sorry about your relapse last week.

I hope that you enjoy July 4th this year.

Nuudawn

Spending time and connecting with others "for real" ...really being there appreciating and sharing the moments..is what holidays should be all about. I hope you have a wonderful time.

mecanix

Non not many of us life Londoners look up guvn'r , coz of the pigeons or the urchins pick pocketing / rucksack raiding .

I used to never have a problem getting through any day sober before i was about 16 and i was thoroughly miserable back then .
in the first year of this sobriety that was proof positive that i had somehow got through years and holidays sober before, it gave me some small hope i could do it again given the right curcumstances .

m

Weasel1966

Anna, thank you. But I tend to not accept one day as a relapse. A mistake yes. Terminology is important for me.

I am having a wonderful evening. Nice breeze. And happy to be sober.

M... I remember back when I had not trouble staying sober. All of my 20's were. Why not so easy at this age? Huh... Well I am here today to prove to myself that I can once again.

Thanks nuudawn... Love the icon you have.... I will enjoy my day. Not to many in real friends around here but most certainly none at the bar!

Looking forward to reading posts a lot these next few days.

Always feel free to say hello!

Ken

Hevyn

Hi Ken. Glad you've given the 4th some thought. You're armed & ready for it.

Nice that you have a breeze on LI. We have nothing but heat, humidity, & floods. Plus not looking forward to the dog's reactions to fireworks yet again.

I'm happy you're having a wonderful evening. Congrats on your 2nd sober 4th.

FreeFall

Ken-2 sober 4ths! Very impressive. This will be my first in a long long time. One year sober is right around the corner after that-WooHoo! I usually miss the fireworks because no one wants to leave the bar. I plan to actually see some this year-excited about that!

I've made it through all the other holidays so this one will feel like a great accomplishment-a whole year of sober holidays for me is something I never thought I would be writing.

It really does feel like Independence Day!!

Everyone enjoy the 4th, whatever you're doing

Like2Hike

Ken - you were one of those who inspired me when I started posting here. I'm glad you are in a good way for the 4th. Today is my 6 month sober mark.

Weasel1966

Hey freefall.... Like2hike... The year has been full of ups and downs as you both know for me. Not perfect. Not continuous sobriety. Especially last December...

But yes! I am in a good way this holiday. Continue to get things together. The fall out is still a clean up process but time and not drinking will help me correct all that.

I have planned to be out of the house a bit this evening. For me the night before was always the tough spot. The party before.

Hope everyone stays sober this holiday!

Ken