sickntired78

Welp. Time to stop the madness. 20+ years of weekend binge drinking and somehow I'm not dead yet. I've known that I've needed to completely stop drinking for over 10 years now, but my rationale has always been "well, at least I'm not one of those people who drink every day..." Fact is, If I was, I would have been dead 10 years ago.

A week ago at a friends pool party, I blacked out, and when I woke up, felt another one of the "worst hangovers ever". When I stumbled to the kitchen to get water, I realized that me and a friend had drank almost an entire 1.75 liter bottle of 94 proof Bombay Sapphire. One of the things my friend said stuck in my mind... "dude, if we keep this up, we aren't going to see 40". I totally agree. I kind of want to see 40.

Don't have much time to write now, but my main problem is the friends I keep. They mostly all drink and when I'm in certain situations, such as concerts I love to go to, and just out in general it is hard to resist the temptation. During the work week, I go to the gym and don't drink at all.... then on the weekends, I usually have one night of complete drunken havoc which throws me into a 2-3 day hangover... rinse and repeat. I am soooo freakin sick of this cycle. I need to change it immediately. I don't have any "symptoms" when I don't drink, so it's not a physical issue to stop, it is more of a mental "all of my friends are drinking, I need to also" which is my main problem with quitting, though I know I need to overcome this.

Over the last 20 years I have lost a great marriage to an awesome girl, several other relationships, good friends, gotten a DUI and had way too many embarrassing moments to list here. The bad outweighs the good on an epic scale. Luckily, I have a great job, my DUI was in 2005, so that is taken care of, but, I have made some driving "errors" as of late that are scaring the hell out of me.

Bottom line. I need to ****ing stop drinking. Depression and blackouts, along with the sheer amount consumed during each session are so out of hand that it needs to stop now. I'll be around here to update. Wish me luck

Dee74

Hi sick and tired

My life pretty much revolved around drinking by the end so I really needed to make a lot of changes if I wanted to stay sober - some of those changes were my drinking buddies.

It's not easy - but there is more to life than a drinkfest - and a lot more to do on weekends too

welcome

visch1

Hi. When I finally plugged the jug a bunch of changes had to happen. I went, still do, AA for mu structure changes which included not having my best friend, alcohol, in the house, stop hanging with drinking "friends," and staying away from slippery places in general. It helped to not think about drinking and all the false messages I gave myself for a long time. Probably the best thing I did was get honest with myself. A lot of years have past and it's all worth it. BE WELL

Hevyn

Welcome sickntired. Glad to have you join the family.

I found the support & encouragement I needed here. I'd been drinking all my life. I couldn't imagine doing certain things without it, but I learned to live again in a new way. I found I didn't need it - and it was great to not be numb & foggy. In the end, it just wasn't worth the price I paid. You can get free of it. You've made a wise decision.

sickntired78

Yeah. I agree with both of the above posts. I have 2-3 really close friends that I am going to try to get on board with me to quit or I am just going to have to be the sober one in the crowd. I have made up my mind to quit completely, so I'm hoping I have some support is the issue. Literally everyone I know drinks except for one person. A lot of these people I have been friends with for 10-15 years or more. If need be, I am just going to have to find the strength to quit and be around while other people drink. I can't give up on friends that have been with me through thick and thin for decades. Just not in my nature. I do believe I can find the strength to stop drinking myself though regardless. Once you hit that wall, as I have and Im sure a lot of others here have, it's just time to give it up...

Tamerua

Glad you're here! That was my pattern! Weekend warrior. The good thing is that you're not a daily drinker so you probably won't crave it... Just feel out of whack on the weekends.

You may have to find new friends. I did. I'm much happier for it. I still Facebook and Instagram everyone my old friends. And scroll past the glasses of wine and such, but they're not who I call I hang anymore. You can do this! Good luck.

Soberpotamus

Hi and welcome

whipster

Welcome, I hope you can get sober with us. Lots of good info and techniques here, I use AVRT others use AA, and there are a few more.

thekl0wn

Very similar patterns here. I never was one of "those people". Well, except for the times when I did it as a "joke". Anyway, you'll find a lot of good help and support here.

My situation is VERY similar to yours as far as the friends go... We drank. No matter the situation, we drank. But, I've also been friends with most of them since preschool, so I'm assuming they're not going to disown me for not being the drunken idiot anymore. Though, I don't really want to become the DD either. But, considering I've only been the DD once in the past 10 or so years, I should probably pay my dues. In all honesty, most of them have slowed down on their drinking... They've grown up, started families, and are doing the domestic thing. It's when I'm introduced into the mix when the "let's ****ing party" mode comes out. This may turn out to be a very good thing for everyone! LOL

sickntired78

So, today is day four for me. Which is a normal amount of time, except, this is Saturday night and I have the next day off of work. My "one binge a week" would have likely been tonight. Turned down going to a friends house because of the temptation. I literally feel no "need" to drink when I'm not around it.... it's when I get in that situation where everyone is drinking that I feel I need to at this point.

My plan is to basically go to the gym and go to work for a month solid before going out at all. When I finally do, I am going to formulate a plan and a mindset to be able to hang out and whatnot sober while other people are drinking. It's basically something that I have to do. I am not going to ditch all of my friends because they drink. I just need to be of strong enough mind that I can be around and be sober while others are drinking. Tonight wasn't that night. Home alone and sober for me...

What is everyone else's plan tonight?

sickntired78

Day 14 tomorrow. Made it through another weekend without the bottle. Hope everyone is doing well. My first big test is going to be a concert that I'm going to next Friday. I am mentally preparing myself for it now which is something I've never done. Concerts/comedy shows are a hobby for myself and friends of mine. I have seen over 350 of them total in the last 20 years. I have been sober at about 3 or 4 of them, so as you can see, the sober ratio is not on my side.

I need to be mentally strong to resist all drinking temptations. I have done it a few times before and I am more resolved than ever to stay sober at these events. The hardest part is being around everyone you know while they are drinking. Wish me luck!

Nuudawn

Hey Hey...huge congrats on your 2 weeks of sobriety! Your attitude sounds upbeat and strong. Good on ya. I too am going to a concert this weekend. An outdoor music festival actually. When initially booked and planned months ago..was going to be a helluva drunk up. Plans for whose going with me changed when I sobered up...then they changed again...I'm actually now going alone cuz the room is booked and there are certain people who would make it harder for me..and the non or one or two only drinkers I know are busy. I'm going to park my lawnchair in the sun and look at it as one big ole sober adventure. Fingers crossed. I look forward to hearing your report!

sickntired78

I hear ya. Sounds really similar to my situation. I originally planned to get a hotel room as I did not want to drive drunk. Now, I don't need it as I know I will not be drinking. Have fun at your show!

quitforme79

Yay on 2 weeks!!!!

bigsombrero

Welcome. Yeah being around drinking friends was something I actually had to give up completely - at least for starters. It means a big change in your social life, but it's very much worthwhile, at least in my experience. Good luck and look forward to your posts.