Crossfitdad

I'm going to have to disagree with you on that. The buzz is wonderful for me...if it could just stay at a buzz and not end full out drunk. The buzz isn't the problem for me...hell, being drunk was never a problem because I never caused any problems, it's the waking up at 4:30 am sharp and being a nervous anxiety ridden idiot then having to spend the rest of the day on pins and needles and suffering through the first three hours of work and then going to work out and dragging ass. Again, the buzz is bliss...but until they figure out an antidote for the destruction it does for my body and the living hell it is the next day, I'll keep my alcoholic monster locked up in its little box.


Oh...and edit for the OP. At least you recognized your slip up. Get back to sobriety! You can do it.

lessgravity

Crossfit -

You are so on point for me - though I think it is a combination of you and Nuu.

I was/am the same kind of drinker.

Thanks for posting, your perspective and Nuu's definitely carried me through this one.

Sasha4

Things I have tried..........

Not drinking through the week, just on weekends.
Not drinking spirits through the week, just wine or beer, then vodka on a weekend.
Not drinking more than 2 glasses of wine a night, then what I want on a weekend.
Drinking wine all the time. No vodka.
Drinking beer all the time. No vodka, no wine.
Drinking one can of super strength lager a night. Drinking as I wanted on a weekend.
Not drinking monday, tuesday wednesday, but drinking thursday, friday, saturday and sunday.

The results - massive epic sized fail which lasted all of about two nights and then I ended up back where I was.

You will get there if you want it.

My best
xx

Nuudawn

I suppose I'm fortunate enough that the buzz wasn't bliss anymore..it was a fraud somehow. It's like that scene in the Wizard of Oz..when the great and powerful Oz was exposed for a frightened, nervous little man behind the curtain.

For me the buzz had lost its mystique as I had started to know what the "buzz" really was.. a cop out..and opt out..a numbness...a cowardly answer. I had come along far enough that it wasn't working anymore I guess. For that perhaps I am fortunate.

After over 25 years..I got pretty intimate with "my buzz"...a giant bullsh*t answer to everything and anything.

Dee74

Hi RJY9

I think most of us have confused a period of not drinking with control.

It's not the same thing - I reckon if you really had control you would have remembered all the bad stuff that comes from your drinking and made the decision not to drink that wine.

I'm sorry you feel sobriety sucks - but altho it might seem like ages 17 days is pretty early - you're barely out of withdrawal by that time.

My life revolved around drinking,. When I stopped drinking I had no life left. I had to make changes.

Did you make any other changes to your life?

D

Levitz

Good one Dee
I read somewhere to Concentrate on changing your life..... Not your drinking
Re invent your life and try to focus on other things then always " I'm not going to drink "
Always focusing on the drink makes it tough to "see other areas of your life you could improve.

Ali123

Love this, so true! Will keep this in mind next time i start craving. Anyway that's day 11 in the bag for me, night night!

Ali123

Love this, so true! Will keep this in mind next time i start craving. Thanks nuudawn. Anyway that's day 11 in the bag for me, night night!

Ali123

Love it so much I seemed to have posted twice!

ElegantlyWasted

You're unique; just like me Same thing here. After 50+ days of not drinking.... Drank. The beer I used to love tasted nasty, or at least the first 4 or 5. As best as I can figure out its just how this "thing" works. back up to 15 with some more ammo.

"all of a sudden i thought it was ok to drink??
My AV Beast does that one too.

Nuudawn

lol..we certainly don't lack perseverance.

LadyinBC

Yes sobriety sucked for me in the beginning too. Felt exposed and vulnerable. Lost my shield so to speak.

This journey has it's ups and downs. Focus on the days you were sober and remember what kept you there. I think it is important to know why we screwed up, but dwelling on it gets us know where. The important thing is did you learn anything from it and what you could do different next time.

neferkamichael

RJY9, just pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and get back on your horse, that's all you can do. Rootin for ya.

RJY9

You hit your reset button on 17 days. It gets harder to reset everytime.[/QUOTE]

Grim.

RJY9

Well i drank on Friday and havent had any yesterday or not planning on having any today and its strange because i dont actually want to. I never used to be able to do this as i would carry on drinking. The way i look at it, is that ive drank once in 19 days will carry on my journey from here. Its all i can do and i'm pretty ertain i can suprise myself.