Almost 7 days sober
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Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 8
Almost 7 days sober
I'm new here. I'm 30 years old and I'm addicted to hydro. I also take any pain killer I can get a hold of, but hydro is my favorite! It started last spring when I was given my first roxy. I only took 1/4 because it was a 30, but I fell in love. After that I was always wanting more. I begged friends and family. A few times I stole pills from family. I didn't realize I had a problem until a month ago. I didn't have any for four days and I got really sick. I didn't know what was happening to me. Then I got my script from my doc and everything was alright again. After a few more weeks I ran out again and felt sick again. I called my friend and she helped me realize I was going through w/ds. I was shocked. Then I sat down and started to think about when was the last time I was pill free, and I couldn't remember. I know that it has been daily since February and no more than 4 days since 2013. I don't know how that happened! I hate myself for it.
I have never really been drug free. When I was 15 my dad gave me ambien and I loved it!! I also smoked a lot of pot. By 17 I didn't do anything. Then by 19 I started smoking pot again and was introduced to meth. I really really really loved meth. I was addicted! Only did it on the weekends, but it still had a hold of me. I did that until I was 22. May13th 2005 was the last time I ever touched meth. I got married in July and found out I was pregnant in August. Drugs never crossed my mind. When my son was a year old I stared having headaches, so a family friend would give me oxy to help. I had so much fun on them I would keep on asking her for more. I still didn't do it often. 4 years later I have my second son and was given ty3s for pain. Which I liked but still had my fun and no problem being off. Then my first roxy came and getting high was all I could think about. Where am I going to get them? I begged both of my parents to go to the doc and get scripts, and they gave in.
I really don't know where I'm going with all this but I just want to talk. 7 days now, so all the sickness is gone. But my depression is awful. Still having panic attacks. I don't feel like I deserve my family. When will this all end??
Sorry I just needed to share with people who understand.
I have never really been drug free. When I was 15 my dad gave me ambien and I loved it!! I also smoked a lot of pot. By 17 I didn't do anything. Then by 19 I started smoking pot again and was introduced to meth. I really really really loved meth. I was addicted! Only did it on the weekends, but it still had a hold of me. I did that until I was 22. May13th 2005 was the last time I ever touched meth. I got married in July and found out I was pregnant in August. Drugs never crossed my mind. When my son was a year old I stared having headaches, so a family friend would give me oxy to help. I had so much fun on them I would keep on asking her for more. I still didn't do it often. 4 years later I have my second son and was given ty3s for pain. Which I liked but still had my fun and no problem being off. Then my first roxy came and getting high was all I could think about. Where am I going to get them? I begged both of my parents to go to the doc and get scripts, and they gave in.
I really don't know where I'm going with all this but I just want to talk. 7 days now, so all the sickness is gone. But my depression is awful. Still having panic attacks. I don't feel like I deserve my family. When will this all end??
Sorry I just needed to share with people who understand.
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