What is the ONE thing that helped you stay sober?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 31
What is the ONE thing that helped you stay sober?
I'm sure we could all come up with many things we did or tactics that we used to overcome our addictions, but what is the ONE thing that helped you the most to stay sober? Doesn't matter how long you've had sober, I just thought it would be a good idea for recovering addicts to give their thoughts on the most useful technique used in overcoming their addiction.
For me it was just admitting that it was over. Admitting that the good times of using drugs is over and done with. Realizing that drugs were only fun when I was ignorant to the harm I was heading towards, and how that state of mind can never be achieved again - because once you are aware of sobriety you will always feel that intense guilt if you go back to using. That feeling of guilt is enough to destroy your life, never mind the actual effect of relapsing into the lifestyle again.
So yeah for me the most useful thing in overcoming my obsession to use was just admitting that the good times are over. The good times with the drugs i had are never coming back. It took me a few hard relapses to realize that. I could elaborate on this further but I'd rather keep it short and sweet for now. What is the thing that helped you most in getting you sober?
For me it was just admitting that it was over. Admitting that the good times of using drugs is over and done with. Realizing that drugs were only fun when I was ignorant to the harm I was heading towards, and how that state of mind can never be achieved again - because once you are aware of sobriety you will always feel that intense guilt if you go back to using. That feeling of guilt is enough to destroy your life, never mind the actual effect of relapsing into the lifestyle again.
So yeah for me the most useful thing in overcoming my obsession to use was just admitting that the good times are over. The good times with the drugs i had are never coming back. It took me a few hard relapses to realize that. I could elaborate on this further but I'd rather keep it short and sweet for now. What is the thing that helped you most in getting you sober?
Life Health Prosperity
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Louisana
Posts: 6,752
I used alcohol and drug for 40 or so years, and it just wasn't working anymore. But the only way I got sober was when I went flat broke and knew I wouldn't be working for and extended period of time and wouldn't have any money at all. Same went for the drugs and cigarettes. Now going on 3 years sober, I want sobriety. I have proven to myself that my life is better without all of it. 
Dismember
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: The Mitten, USA
Posts: 1,641
To stop thinking.
It was a lot of wasted effort, obsession, stress and subsequent relapse after relapse before I stopped trying to rationalize why I had a drinking problem. When I stopped asking myself "why" and started doing it all became a lot easier and, ironically, a lot clearer.
It was a lot of wasted effort, obsession, stress and subsequent relapse after relapse before I stopped trying to rationalize why I had a drinking problem. When I stopped asking myself "why" and started doing it all became a lot easier and, ironically, a lot clearer.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: My city of ruins...
Posts: 593
The one thing out of several that most keeps me sober is my acceptance that the party's over. I had to give up and I was so tired of being sick and tired. I gave in and waved the white flag.
Once I realized that the good times were never, ever coming back - that my good memories of my drinking times were just that, memories - I started trying to figure out how to make new ones that didn't include destroying my health and my life piece by piece!!
Good topic! Thank you
Once I realized that the good times were never, ever coming back - that my good memories of my drinking times were just that, memories - I started trying to figure out how to make new ones that didn't include destroying my health and my life piece by piece!!
Good topic! Thank you
Marcher
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Florida
Posts: 3,235
All of the above! Seriously, all of the above!
And moving. I moved away from where I lived during my years using. Far away, and have been starting over. I know everyone can't do that, but I did.
And then I found SR! Yea!
And moving. I moved away from where I lived during my years using. Far away, and have been starting over. I know everyone can't do that, but I did.
And then I found SR! Yea!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: WA, USA
Posts: 2,591
It would be nice if I could say willpower alone kept me from drinking but I know now that willpower can never win against addiction.
For me the worry of continued legal problems if i continued to drink was a powerful force to keep me sober, along with many other things that I used to stay sober.
For me the worry of continued legal problems if i continued to drink was a powerful force to keep me sober, along with many other things that I used to stay sober.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 1,920
I only have 29 days of sobriety but exercise and cooking healthy food has helped me the most. When I get out and walk or run I don't think about drinking or smoking, I just enjoy my body, and I think doing new things is really important for me. This weekend I am going to drive somewhere nearby I have never been. So changing other behaviors has motivated me to stay drink free.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: NC
Posts: 1,737
Fallen,
You've asked two questions: what helped you get sober and what helps to stay sober, which for me is two separate answers.
I think initially what helped me get sober for the first few months was recognizing that any aspect of my life that was related to drinking was subject to change: the people I hung out with, the things that I did, the places I would go, etc. It wasn't necessary for all those things to be removed from my life (there wasn't much that didn't somehow tie back to drinking on some level), but I had to be willing to change them to the extent needed that they no longer presented a threat to my very fragile sobriety.
Longer term, I think the thing that has helped keep me sober is working my program on a daily basis. In that sense my sobriety is similar to my drinking: I used to drink every day, now I do something for my sobriety every day. That may be talking to another alcoholic, reading, meditation, going to an AA meeting or going on SR, but it is a very rare day that I do nothing for my sobriety. I find that if I keep my routine I am generally positive and productive. When I am off my game for a couple of days I can pretty easily slide into "restless, irritable, and discontent" mode. When I feel this way I know that I have gotten off the beaten path, and adjust accordingly.
Early sobriety was hard, I had to put a lot of work into it for a lot of months. I am now 3 1/2 years sober and the daily effort required is far less, but no less important.
You've asked two questions: what helped you get sober and what helps to stay sober, which for me is two separate answers.
I think initially what helped me get sober for the first few months was recognizing that any aspect of my life that was related to drinking was subject to change: the people I hung out with, the things that I did, the places I would go, etc. It wasn't necessary for all those things to be removed from my life (there wasn't much that didn't somehow tie back to drinking on some level), but I had to be willing to change them to the extent needed that they no longer presented a threat to my very fragile sobriety.
Longer term, I think the thing that has helped keep me sober is working my program on a daily basis. In that sense my sobriety is similar to my drinking: I used to drink every day, now I do something for my sobriety every day. That may be talking to another alcoholic, reading, meditation, going to an AA meeting or going on SR, but it is a very rare day that I do nothing for my sobriety. I find that if I keep my routine I am generally positive and productive. When I am off my game for a couple of days I can pretty easily slide into "restless, irritable, and discontent" mode. When I feel this way I know that I have gotten off the beaten path, and adjust accordingly.
Early sobriety was hard, I had to put a lot of work into it for a lot of months. I am now 3 1/2 years sober and the daily effort required is far less, but no less important.
Guest
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: The Deep South
Posts: 14,636
Lost time. Though we often hear not to dwell on the past, and not to regret, the truth is that I realized I wasn't getting any younger. I knew I could stop now in my mid 30's and have a really good life. So, in light of a few lost years, knowing I now have a great life with my new husband to look forward to... that is a wonderful feeling and motivator.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,997
Getting sober??
I had 10 years sober several years ago so I knew for an absolute fact life was better. No matter what life threw at me. Those years were the best.
Staying sober?
I said I was done and never looked back. I was willing to endure all the unpleasantness the first month or so to break through to the other side. I promised myself I would do anything but not drink. I meant it. I knew it wouldn't last forever and I knew it was worth it. Now I use SR to remind me to not forget....and to pay it back.
I had 10 years sober several years ago so I knew for an absolute fact life was better. No matter what life threw at me. Those years were the best.
Staying sober?
I said I was done and never looked back. I was willing to endure all the unpleasantness the first month or so to break through to the other side. I promised myself I would do anything but not drink. I meant it. I knew it wouldn't last forever and I knew it was worth it. Now I use SR to remind me to not forget....and to pay it back.
Nothing Left to do but Smile.
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Upstate NY
Posts: 808
I'll give it up to fear of death and the thought of leaving my kids without a father. I was 41 and having many skin rashes, gout, and finally liver pain. Once I started to have the liver pain, on came the panic attacks every time I had a drink and could feel the throbbing. I knew I had to either quit or I wasn't going to last many more years. I call it the easy way out on my decision to quit because I wasn't intending to quit even with the other problems bothering me. The liver sent me over the edge mentally. Over a year later and taking another drink still scares the heck out of me.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 31
Hey guys. I can see how it looks like I asked two questions. I more ment 'staying' sober. Just replace the word "getting" in my last sentence with "staying". But feel free to answer both if you wish! Thanks for all the replies so far!
Thanks for all the replies so far!
Nothing is impossible!
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: EAGAN
Posts: 792
Originally Posted by FallenAlien 
I'm sure we could all come up with many things we did or tactics that we used to overcome our addictions, but what is the ONE thing that helped you the most to stay sober? Doesn't matter how long you've had sober, I just thought it would be a good idea for recovering addicts to give their thoughts on the most useful technique used in overcoming their addiction.
For me it was just admitting that it was over. Admitting that the good times of using drugs is over and done with. Realizing that drugs were only fun when I was ignorant to the harm I was heading towards, and how that state of mind can never be achieved again - because once you are aware of sobriety you will always feel that intense guilt if you go back to using. That feeling of guilt is enough to destroy your life, never mind the actual effect of relapsing into the lifestyle again.
So yeah for me the most useful thing in overcoming my obsession to use was just admitting that the good times are over. The good times with the drugs i had are never coming back. It took me a few hard relapses to realize that. I could elaborate on this further but I'd rather keep it short and sweet for now. What is the thing that helped you most in getting you sober?
For me it was just admitting that it was over. Admitting that the good times of using drugs is over and done with. Realizing that drugs were only fun when I was ignorant to the harm I was heading towards, and how that state of mind can never be achieved again - because once you are aware of sobriety you will always feel that intense guilt if you go back to using. That feeling of guilt is enough to destroy your life, never mind the actual effect of relapsing into the lifestyle again.
So yeah for me the most useful thing in overcoming my obsession to use was just admitting that the good times are over. The good times with the drugs i had are never coming back. It took me a few hard relapses to realize that. I could elaborate on this further but I'd rather keep it short and sweet for now. What is the thing that helped you most in getting you sober?
So, I dove in head first and focused my entire being on sobriety, my relationship with god and the Universe, and trying to push myself everyday outside of my comfort zone. It wasnt easy, but it slowly got better and now 2 years later, I feel and live better than I ever imagined when I first started. For me, being free........I mean truly free to think clearly, not have anxiety, and to be social and learn new things without the crutch of alcohol is my reason for living the way I do.To have the blinders removed so I can see how things really are vs. the way I thought when drinking. I want to be here, I want to be present every day, and I want to make a difference in other people's lives and the world. All I needed was my desire and drive, as well as some faith in knowing things would get better if I just stuck to it and really, really tried. I took a chance on it, and it has paid off.
Grateful
Join Date: May 2013
Location: NC
Posts: 1,763
Admitting I was powerless over alcohol. Remembering that the first drink gets me drunk.
I'm only 72 days sober so it's very much a work in progress, but remembering that I am powerless over alcohol once I take that first drink is important in these early days.
I'm only 72 days sober so it's very much a work in progress, but remembering that I am powerless over alcohol once I take that first drink is important in these early days.
now's the time
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 2,181
So much! So many many reasons to be sober these days.
But my one ace tip is yoga.
Not just any exercise; I'm a really active person and I can seriously feel the difference between just regular cardio and regular cardio plus yoga. I sleep better, handle stress better, and am just happier.
This is Your Brain on Yoga | Psychology Today
"Recent research on the neurochemistry of yoga provides some clues about how yoga might exert anxiolytic effects: two fascinating randomized controlled Magnetic Resonance Spectroscopy studies by Streeter and colleagues demonstrate that regular practice of gentle yoga, but not walking, releases a chemical called GABA in the thalamus.1,2 GABA is sort of the “grand inhibitor” in the brain, and plays a central role in suppressing neural activity3. Classical anti-anxiety medications, such as benzodiazepines, work by encouraging the release of GABA in the central nervous system. GABA was shown to be significantly higher in the brains of those subjects who had been doing yoga. The study also compared GABA levels directly before an after an hour of yoga, and showed a 27% increase! GABA is what alcohol mimics, by temporarily binding to the same chemical receptors; you can thank GABA receptor binding for those feelings of relaxation and decreased anxiety that come with enjoying an adult beverage."
But my one ace tip is yoga.
Not just any exercise; I'm a really active person and I can seriously feel the difference between just regular cardio and regular cardio plus yoga. I sleep better, handle stress better, and am just happier.
This is Your Brain on Yoga | Psychology Today
"Recent research on the neurochemistry of yoga provides some clues about how yoga might exert anxiolytic effects: two fascinating randomized controlled Magnetic Resonance Spectroscopy studies by Streeter and colleagues demonstrate that regular practice of gentle yoga, but not walking, releases a chemical called GABA in the thalamus.1,2 GABA is sort of the “grand inhibitor” in the brain, and plays a central role in suppressing neural activity3. Classical anti-anxiety medications, such as benzodiazepines, work by encouraging the release of GABA in the central nervous system. GABA was shown to be significantly higher in the brains of those subjects who had been doing yoga. The study also compared GABA levels directly before an after an hour of yoga, and showed a 27% increase! GABA is what alcohol mimics, by temporarily binding to the same chemical receptors; you can thank GABA receptor binding for those feelings of relaxation and decreased anxiety that come with enjoying an adult beverage."
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