Gtot

Hi, I'd like to introduce myself as Gtot. Like tator tot but just Gtot. I dont know how this site works (if we can add friends) but I can sure use some positive words and positive people in my empty boat

So far it has been tougher than people think and also tougher than I thought when I said I wanted to be clean and sober. I made mistakes in the past and embarrassed myself soo many times under the influence. I dont have friends to talk to outside of facebook, just my husband. That's enough for me but he doesn't realize I want to stay sober from now on not just temporarily....sometimes I wonder which i want..

7 days clean & sober

bigsombrero

Your husband "doesnt' realize" you want to be sober forever? Why haven't you told him? Just curious, it seems like your life-partner would be a wonderful ally for you in this fight.

And yes, in my experience a total lifestyle makeover is in order. Ditching old friends is tough but neccessary. Don't be afraid to start associating with new places, people, and things. Old habits, as you seem to be aware, are hard to break. Sounds like you are off to a good start with a good attitude...good luck!

Gtot

I didn't mean for it to sound like that. I'm just a bit nervous writing my situation for people to see. He is supportive in knowing I am sober but it's me that sends mixed signals about if i want this to be perminant or temporarily. Thank you for your wonderful advice

Dib42

My wife also didn't realize I wanted to stay sober forever. I think in reality she didn't want me to stay sober forever. She wanted to think I could still go out and have cocktails with her every so often. I stayed sober for awhile, she seemed to enjoy sober me just as much if not more, than drunk me. Then I drank again, slowly at first, then got out of hand again. Now she's on my side about me quitting forever and I'm back here starting over.

Your husband may setting up the "temporary" boundary as a sort of defense mechanism in case you start again. If he feels you are only cutting back, if you start again, it won't be like you failed.

Don't worry about the "forever" thing, you just have to not drink right now, the forever part will take care of itself.

least

to the family! It's hard changing our lives around to accommodate our sobriety but it is possible. I'd say, if you're not sure give yourself three months of sobriety to see how it feels. You can always go back to drinking if you like but give yourself some time to really know what it feels like to live sober. I'm doing it and I love it!

whipster

Congrats on the 7 days. I hesitated telling my wife anything because I had said the same thing so many times before. I'm just going to keep going then pretty soon she will see the new me in words and action, and not just words.

You have a good start, keep it going.

Gtot

Thank you all soo much! I may be the only one in my world doing this but this shows me I am not alone! You guys, this made my day!

@Dib42 You had me in tears! You explained what I tried to in my first post. Thank you

Dib42

I tend to make women cry . . . *terrible joke sorry*

Nonsensical

Congrats on 7 days sober, that's awesome!

You can learn quite a lot from reading the posts around here. I hope you get a chance to poke around the other forums. I'm always glad when I do.

You can do this!