MyTimeNow

Thanks Jess, hope you are well Is it wrong to be counting down to bed time at 4.30pm? I just want to get today done before the AV goes into over-drive!

Had to pop to the shops, bypassed the 2 bottles of wine and instead I have 2 packets of cookies LOL. Hey ho, Rome wasn't built in a day

mecanix

hmm i remeber that sneaky AV .. i used to go to bed at 6:30 pm to fox it sometimes .
Great achievment dodging that wine in the shops .. i did'nt wander down that aisle for about 3 months ..

Cookies are a good treat / reward and infinately more sencible than what i used .. tubs of luxury chocolate chip ice cream .. Errk !

M

MyTimeNow

I'm a bit over cookie'd! I don't usually eat many sweet things, I prefer my junk in the savoury form. Mmmm burger.... The kids would be thrilled if I started turning up with luxury choc chip ice cream though! I was in my local shop so there isn't a wine aisle as such, it's a tiny place, wherever you are standing you are practically next to everything. I actually feel safer in there than the supermarket strangely enough. It's because I've pretty much caned it, I'd be too embarrassed to buy from there again, but Morrisons gives me that anonymity that I need to not even think about!

Well 6.20 - we've had dinner, DD has gone to bed after a busy weekend/early start, I reckon I might follow her!

Have been looking at 30 day shred on Youtube... just looking for now... gotta learn the routine first I'll see how I feel in the morning. Watch this space!

Have a great evening

jkb

Mtn-
I never had much of a sweet tooth... or so I thought.... now I can polish off a piece of cake and then be in bed at 9 pm...lol. So nope I see nothing wrong with snacks or early bedtimes....:rotfxko

I am doing well. Thanks for asking, Jess

MyTimeNow

Haha I am going to bed now, still feeling a bit stuffed but I've clearly entered grumpy mode... the neighbours are mowing their lawn - I mean how dare they? Don't they know I want to be asleep by 7 on this lovely perfect lawn mowing evening?!! I can hear kids playing in their gardens too. I mean sheesh...

Lol bed is the best place for me! Catch you all tomorrow

MyTimeNow

Not grumpy this morning Horrible nightmare riddled sleep again, but it was sleep so that'll do me.

30 day shred? Yeah who was I trying to kid? Maybe tomorrow! Tea and Candy Crush Saga for me. Another addiction.

My brain has started questioning the never concept this morning, but but ... but what if I want to get trashed, just once a fortnight, that's better than nightly right? Pure AV I know and pretty pointless as I KNOW that allowance, any kind of allowance is pointless, I'll go straight back to where I was, and even if I didn't I'd be white knuckling it for 13 days at a time thinking of nothing else. Not really where I want to be.

Hmmm random thoughts from me this morning.

Sooo my plan for today... general housey stuff this morning, DD to nursery at 1, off to gym at 2 with DS, come home, put his new bed together, cook dinner, fetch DD at 6, eat dinner, go to bed. Doesn't sound very exciting on 'paper' , still I'd rather be safely in bed than anywhere else!

Waffle waffle.

More tea? Why thank you

MyTimeNow

Was just pm'ing a friend but thought would share here too, just to continue my diary of MTN aged 37 3/4 (ok a half but...)

I feel ABSOLUTELY RUBBISH!!!!

Seriously, I cannot wake myself up. This morning was productive enough, dismantled DS bed, took it all down into the garden for the scrap man to collect. Got a double divan upstairs with mattress and got all that together. Did the usual and had lunch with DD, got her to nursery.

Then thought crikey I'm tired. No gym, I've slept for 2.5 hours solid, I don't think I even moved. Just zonk.

I can't wake up now though, I'm just having a coffee before I get DD and I feel completely bleurgh zombified. No headaches, no shakes, no sickness, just absent and cuckoo. I actually feel like crying.

I don't ever want to go through this again

The good news is I don't have to

Another early night for me then!

Lifebeginsat41

But tomorrow you'll feel better :-)

Good call on keeping busy - ill be doing the same once I log out of SR. Hope tomorrow you feel less cuckoo :-)

MyTimeNow

Thanks LB and yes I will - Hopefully! Felt a bit better after a walk round to the nursery, managed to converse with people without looking too blank...

DD has just gone to bed. Once she's settled I'll be not long after. Hope you have a lovely evening, and I hope I'm not too cuckoo tomorrow either (although there is always an element )

Blackcat11

Rather in the early days for me as well. Best of luck as we jouney out of the wilderness together!

2granddaughters

Are you attending AA meetings in your area ?

All the best.

Bob R

ReadyAtLast

That's the spirit

You'll feel better tomorro and better and better everyday from now on

Sleep well-listen to what your body needs.x

MyTimeNow

Good luck to you too Blackcat, hope you're feeling ok in these early days

I'm not Bob, I'm following a secular route. Some say it hasn't helped much so far, but I'd never had that feeling of I'm ready, REALLY ready to ditch this now. I have looked at their literature and I did an online meeting earlier this year so I'm not completely closed minded. Thanks for asking though.

All the best to you too.

MyTimeNow

Thank you RAL

DD finally conked out, DS watching Holby. I'm off to bed to do some reading.... think I will zonk again though as soon as I hit the pillow. Catch you tomorrow have a lovely evening xx

ReadyAtLast

Hope you're ok MTN.Thinking of you

MyTimeNow

I'm good thanks, had a productive day, some garden, some housey stuff - even made some cupcakes - packet mix of course!

I've been to bed and got up again, far too hot and humid tonight. Oh and I've just stuffed down a microwave lasagne, wasn't even particularly hungry, but it seemed to go down a treat

Back off to bed now, to finish my book and hopefully sleep. Hope you are ok and have had a good day. Catch up in the morning

MyTimeNow

Shout out for Vic, hope you are ok missus xx

MyTimeNow

Have just completed day one of level 1 30 day shred. Crikey if alcohol is not going to kill me I reckon Jillian Michaels is!

Marjoram

Welcome Back MTN - I remember you from last year. I'm in the same boat as you, but I agree that it does feel good to be back. If this were easy, everyone would be sober. We know that things only get better when we are sober. Even the difficult times in life are better sober. As crazy as that sounds.
Take care of yourself, and know you are not alone.

MyTimeNow

Hey Marjoram I remember you Glad you are back too and yes it is good to be here. These early days are hard but I feel so much better just knowing I'm committing myself. Take care of yourself too, I've just seen your thread. We CAN do this.