AugustWest11

Has been the absolute worse one I have ever had Not just physically but on my mind .. I am lossing it and All I want to do is go get some beers and "take the edge off" .. But I know I will end up buying a pint of something as well to "help me sleep" Then I will be drunk and walk back to get something to "forget" it all ..

Marjoram

August - Day ones are rough. I don't know what it is about them. I've had many, many. But, get through it. It's not saying day 30, will be easy, could be just as hard as this day one you are dealing with. But, please stay strong and forget the drinking. Find something to do that makes you happy. Drink a big glass of water so it fills you up so you don't have a desire to drink anything. Do, something, but drink? No way. Stand up to this and fight it hard. I will, too. It's day one for me, too, but it can be done. Believe it or not, you will actually sleep better in the long run without drinking. Just give it time. Alcohol fixes nothing. What sobriety can do for us is endless. I promise if I struggle today to come here and reach out for help as you are doing. That is a good move on your part.

least

Don't give in to the urge to drink. You know where that will take you and you don't want to go there.

Mrbeagle

You can do it August, I was in exactly the same position as you yesterday, I was an emotional wreck, but I got through it and feel significantly better now.

Take things a minute at a time if you have to. I know it's easier said than done, anything to distract yourself. Listening to podcasts got me through yesterday.

AugustWest11

Thanx guys but honestly I hit rock bottom & "I just don't want to deal" That has always been my favorite saying .. But still here & not going to the store so again Thanx ..

MidnightBlue

Hi, August.

Drinking actually solves nothing. It doesn't take away the pain - it masks it for a few hours and charges damn high price for it making the problem worse and the life a mess.

I know you are going through rough times and you are worried about the future.

But there's nothing you can't deal with. Seriously. Unless you let your AV convince you otherwise.

You can cope with all this without booze - insomnia, worries, scary future. It's just as big as we let it be.

It's Day 1. Let it be the start of new life.

Take care. Keep posting, keep in touch.

AugustWest11

Thanx MB yea when I lost contact w\ the board it made it so much harder then I just dug my hole ...

ScottFromWI

I think you need to find a new favorite saying. You can't want sobriety and want to "not deal" at the same time, right?

AugustWest11

Ohhh you are so right there .. I got read the riot act from my cousin b\c of that on my trip

ScottFromWI

So turn it into something positive. You know that "not dealing" means drinking. And you know what drinking does and how it makes you feel.

Start with something very simple -we can't fix all the problems in our lives at once. So next time you feel that you can't deal and want to drink, try something very simple like doing the dishes. Or picking up the living room. Or washing some laundry. You can then see direct results of your actions and move on to the next task. You will be amazed at how much you can accomplish over time when you just do one thing at a time.

MidnightBlue

Great advice here, August.

Often, when I'm in low mood and don't feel like doing anything, I set my alarm at the cell phone for five or seven minutes and do what I can do during this time. Usually once I start I will do a lot more.

There's more positive in this world that meets the eye. Look for some)

Marjoram

Some of the most simple things in life are the best things. I like what was said above as well. You definitely have good, positive people in your corner. I have this on my desk:

May today there be peace within. May you trust you are exactly where you are meant to be. May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith in yourself and others. May you use the gifts that you have received, and pass on the love that has been given to you. May you be content with yourself just the way you are. Let this knowledge settle into your bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and love. It is there for each and every one of us.

Nonsensical

Get after it.
Get on it.
Get to it.

Prepositionally,
Non

Anna

I hope you feel better as the day goes on.

AugustWest11

I know I know .. Just worrying and I don't mix I do need to let it go cause nothing can be done for a few hours .. Just

wiscsober

After reading your posts I see the things you are not doing that will help you big time.

There is a huge list for you to do that will take the edge off...

First SR is great

Make sure you eat, graze, through out the day.
Drink plenty of fluids besides water
Take a shower

Call someone in recovery...you will probably help them...like you are helping us@SR
Get outside
Don't do this alone and talk to friends, family, recovery people, church members, neighbor, whoever

Get some sleep.
Pull the shades, turn off the phone and computer, and sleep off and on...

Unless you did something that the police are going to break down the door you shouldn't be bothered!!! Just kidding...but times when I was sobering I really tried to think if I did something that I forgot that would land me in jail!!!

Best to you friend...you know what to do

AugustWest11

sadly the only person I even talk to up here I burned that bridge on this Binge 1 positive thing is I grabbed extra cigs so I didn't "have" to walk near the liquor store lol I am trying to eat and all .. drinking water cause I don't want to drink caffeine to make my anxiety worse :p lol

ScottFromWI

I have anxiety too AW. I think I probably always did but drowned it out with drinking my whole life. For me it still hasn't gone away completely even after several months of sobriety, but it's gotten MUCH better.

My earlier post about doing small things also helps me tremendously with my anxiety, just as much as it did with cravings initially. When you have idle time on your hands you worry about everything. When you are doing something you can concentrate just on that task and the other worries go away. Give it a shot - the worst thing that can happen is you'll have a cleaner house1

AugustWest11

I have been trying but it just seems so BIG this time that the fear an worry are eating me up alive .. Not to mention the house is immaculate cause of my roommate LOL But I see what your saying .. I would love for a walk but I know once I get going it will be to the liquor store

ScottFromWI

It seems big until you actually start doing something. What's the worst that can happen? Read a book. Reorganize your CD's. Make a list of things you'd like to get done today. Really, anything other than just sitting there worrying about things you can't control.