What are some of the biggest changes.........
Nothing is impossible!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: EAGAN
Posts: 792
What are some of the biggest changes.........
I was thinking we could share some of our of personal advances or changes for the positive that we have experienced sober vs. When we use. I think this is fun, but also helps newcomers to see how much better life can really get when you arent using. So, what are some of the biggest changes you have experienced (for the positive) after quitting alcohol or drugs? You can also share how long you have been clean or sober, but you dont have to.
I'll start. For me , the best changes have been: (2 years of sobriety)
1. I have WAY less anxiety now than I ever did using. I still get anxious, but its manageable and doesn't keep me a prisoner anymore.
2. I have real friendships now. I used to have a ton of bar "Friends" and even though I only have 2-3 close friends now.........id rather have 3 quarters than 75 pennies.
3. I like myself again and I keep rising to the occasion whenever challenged. This makes me believe I really can do anything if I put my mind to it.
4. I am happier (obviously) and I got a job doing something I love after I was able to finally finish school.
5. When I wake up on a Sunday morning, I dont dread what I said or did when out,What I may have posted on facebook, or what I texted the night before.
Okay, now everyone share
I'll start. For me , the best changes have been: (2 years of sobriety)
1. I have WAY less anxiety now than I ever did using. I still get anxious, but its manageable and doesn't keep me a prisoner anymore.
2. I have real friendships now. I used to have a ton of bar "Friends" and even though I only have 2-3 close friends now.........id rather have 3 quarters than 75 pennies.
3. I like myself again and I keep rising to the occasion whenever challenged. This makes me believe I really can do anything if I put my mind to it.
4. I am happier (obviously) and I got a job doing something I love after I was able to finally finish school.
5. When I wake up on a Sunday morning, I dont dread what I said or did when out,What I may have posted on facebook, or what I texted the night before.
Okay, now everyone share
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 5,678
I didn't realise until I got sober just how much of the things I did were related to other people's expectations of me, which surprised me because I always thought I didn't care what people thought. I guess that because I couldn't drink anymore I couldn't use my resentments of other people as an excuse to drink so I didn't create any by letting people manipulate me. I am more honest as a result and my relationships with others are better, plus I am happier.
My anxiety has all but disappeared. I used to have frequent panic attacks and was bordering on agoraphobia and hypochondria. Now any anxiety I get is directly linked to everyday life stuff and is laughable in comparison to what I used to have to deal with.
I am happy now, occasionally, but I have these intense moments of contentment I have never experienced before. It's an odd feeling. I don't get suicidal thoughts anymore either.
I had a fair bit of nerve damage from my drinking which as pretty much disappeared now. I get the odd tingle now and then but it is so nice to have all the feeling back in my legs.
I continue to see improvements in my life pretty much constantly. I am 15 months sober now and although I am happy with the changes I've seen so far I get the impression I haven't seen anything yet. I feel so much better now and able to make more positive steps whereas for the majority of the first year I felt pretty rotten. It's all good stuff, even the bad stuff has a silver lining.
Great idea for a thread
x
My anxiety has all but disappeared. I used to have frequent panic attacks and was bordering on agoraphobia and hypochondria. Now any anxiety I get is directly linked to everyday life stuff and is laughable in comparison to what I used to have to deal with.
I am happy now, occasionally, but I have these intense moments of contentment I have never experienced before. It's an odd feeling. I don't get suicidal thoughts anymore either.
I had a fair bit of nerve damage from my drinking which as pretty much disappeared now. I get the odd tingle now and then but it is so nice to have all the feeling back in my legs.
I continue to see improvements in my life pretty much constantly. I am 15 months sober now and although I am happy with the changes I've seen so far I get the impression I haven't seen anything yet. I feel so much better now and able to make more positive steps whereas for the majority of the first year I felt pretty rotten. It's all good stuff, even the bad stuff has a silver lining.
Great idea for a thread
x
Nothing is impossible!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: EAGAN
Posts: 792
Originally Posted by hypochondriac 
I didn't realise until I got sober just how much of the things I did were related to other people's expectations of me, which surprised me because I always thought I didn't care what people thought. I guess that because I couldn't drink anymore I couldn't use my resentments of other people as an excuse to drink so I didn't create any by letting people manipulate me. I am more honest as a result and my relationships with others are better, plus I am happier.
My anxiety has all but disappeared. I used to have frequent panic attacks and was bordering on agoraphobia and hypochondria. Now any anxiety I get is directly linked to everyday life stuff and is laughable in comparison to what I used to have to deal with.
I am happy now, occasionally, but I have these intense moments of contentment I have never experienced before. It's an odd feeling. I don't get suicidal thoughts anymore either.
I had a fair bit of nerve damage from my drinking which as pretty much disappeared now. I get the odd tingle now and then but it is so nice to have all the feeling back in my legs.
I continue to see improvements in my life pretty much constantly. I am 15 months sober now and although I am happy with the changes I've seen so far I get the impression I haven't seen anything yet. I feel so much better now and able to make more positive steps whereas for the majority of the first year I felt pretty rotten. It's all good stuff, even the bad stuff has a silver lining.
Great idea for a thread x
My anxiety has all but disappeared. I used to have frequent panic attacks and was bordering on agoraphobia and hypochondria. Now any anxiety I get is directly linked to everyday life stuff and is laughable in comparison to what I used to have to deal with.
I am happy now, occasionally, but I have these intense moments of contentment I have never experienced before. It's an odd feeling. I don't get suicidal thoughts anymore either.
I had a fair bit of nerve damage from my drinking which as pretty much disappeared now. I get the odd tingle now and then but it is so nice to have all the feeling back in my legs.
I continue to see improvements in my life pretty much constantly. I am 15 months sober now and although I am happy with the changes I've seen so far I get the impression I haven't seen anything yet. I feel so much better now and able to make more positive steps whereas for the majority of the first year I felt pretty rotten. It's all good stuff, even the bad stuff has a silver lining.
Great idea for a thread
xI also had paralyzing anxiety. I thought I would never be free of it. I didnt realize it was all alcohol, the whole time. Now I am learning to be social and meet people as myself, and I like what I am seeing.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: San Diego
Posts: 611
Good topic. I am in my freaking head all stressed out today, so I really appreciate your thread. Looking at these things and being positive is great for people like us!
Here are mine :
1.) Definitely agree on the having REAL friends and knowing I can trust them and talk to them about anything. I feel so much more loved and accepted by my new social group than the party people!
2.) Being able to maintain a loving relationship with a man who I adore and having our lives be stable, mostly happy and not a bunch of immature drama or fighting. It's the first true love I have had in a way! My guy is awesome but part of that is me becomming a better person first. I would not have dated the old me! Haha. She was a mess.
3.) Better health overall, more energy and less days spent hungover or sick from opiate detox (which is a nightmare I would not wish on my worst enemy).
4.) Being able to keep my commitments. People can count on me. Setting goals that I actually reach. All of this is very important to me and I'm learning to actually like myself.
Here are mine :
1.) Definitely agree on the having REAL friends and knowing I can trust them and talk to them about anything. I feel so much more loved and accepted by my new social group than the party people!
2.) Being able to maintain a loving relationship with a man who I adore and having our lives be stable, mostly happy and not a bunch of immature drama or fighting. It's the first true love I have had in a way! My guy is awesome but part of that is me becomming a better person first. I would not have dated the old me! Haha. She was a mess.
3.) Better health overall, more energy and less days spent hungover or sick from opiate detox (which is a nightmare I would not wish on my worst enemy).
4.) Being able to keep my commitments. People can count on me. Setting goals that I actually reach. All of this is very important to me and I'm learning to actually like myself.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,564
I agree with your #1, Night. My anxiety was through the roof - I was very confrontational and erratic. Yet my answer was to have another drink. 
It's so good to find the calm, serene me that was always in there. I'd agree with your #5, too - except that for me it was waking up EVERY day wondering what I said or did the night before.
Drinking and postponing decisions until everything was completely unmanageable was the way I lived for so long. I'm so thankful to be able to repair the things I messed up - and to stay on top of problems as they occur, instead of hiding my head in the sand.
I'm so glad to be free of it - free to go places where they don't serve alcohol (gasp!). Free to sit in a movie for 2 hours without getting shaky, free to make arrangements to do things early in the day without worrying about a hangover or being sick. Never again, thankyou!
It's so good to find the calm, serene me that was always in there. I'd agree with your #5, too - except that for me it was waking up EVERY day wondering what I said or did the night before. Drinking and postponing decisions until everything was completely unmanageable was the way I lived for so long. I'm so thankful to be able to repair the things I messed up - and to stay on top of problems as they occur, instead of hiding my head in the sand.
I'm so glad to be free of it - free to go places where they don't serve alcohol (gasp!). Free to sit in a movie for 2 hours without getting shaky, free to make arrangements to do things early in the day without worrying about a hangover or being sick. Never again, thankyou!
Nothing is impossible!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: EAGAN
Posts: 792
Originally Posted by BabyJane
Good topic. I am in my freaking head all stressed out today, so I really appreciate your thread. Looking at these things and being positive is great for people like us!
Here are mine :
1.) Definitely agree on the having REAL friends and knowing I can trust them and talk to them about anything. I feel so much more loved and accepted by my new social group than the party people!
2.) Being able to maintain a loving relationship with a man who I adore and having our lives be stable, mostly happy and not a bunch of immature drama or fighting. It's the first true love I have had in a way! My guy is awesome but part of that is me becomming a better person first. I would not have dated the old me! Haha. She was a mess.
3.) Better health overall, more energy and less days spent hungover or sick from opiate detox (which is a nightmare I would not wish on my worst enemy).
4.) Being able to keep my commitments. People can count on me. Setting goals that I actually reach. All of this is very important to me and I'm learning to actually like myself.
Here are mine :
1.) Definitely agree on the having REAL friends and knowing I can trust them and talk to them about anything. I feel so much more loved and accepted by my new social group than the party people!
2.) Being able to maintain a loving relationship with a man who I adore and having our lives be stable, mostly happy and not a bunch of immature drama or fighting. It's the first true love I have had in a way! My guy is awesome but part of that is me becomming a better person first. I would not have dated the old me! Haha. She was a mess.
3.) Better health overall, more energy and less days spent hungover or sick from opiate detox (which is a nightmare I would not wish on my worst enemy).
4.) Being able to keep my commitments. People can count on me. Setting goals that I actually reach. All of this is very important to me and I'm learning to actually like myself.
Nothing is impossible!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: EAGAN
Posts: 792
Originally Posted by Hevyn
I agree with your #1, Night. My anxiety was through the roof - I was very confrontational and erratic. Yet my answer was to have another drink. It's so good to find the calm, serene me that was always in there. I'd agree with your #5, too - except that for me it was waking up EVERY day wondering what I said or did the night before.
Drinking and postponing decisions until everything was completely unmanageable was the way I lived for so long. I'm so thankful to be able to repair the things I messed up - and to stay on top of problems as they occur, instead of hiding my head in the sand.
I'm so glad to be free of it - free to go places where they don't serve alcohol (gasp!). Free to sit in a movie for 2 hours without getting shaky, free to make arrangements to do things early in the day without worrying about a hangover or being sick. Never again, thankyou!
It's so good to find the calm, serene me that was always in there. I'd agree with your #5, too - except that for me it was waking up EVERY day wondering what I said or did the night before. Drinking and postponing decisions until everything was completely unmanageable was the way I lived for so long. I'm so thankful to be able to repair the things I messed up - and to stay on top of problems as they occur, instead of hiding my head in the sand.
I'm so glad to be free of it - free to go places where they don't serve alcohol (gasp!). Free to sit in a movie for 2 hours without getting shaky, free to make arrangements to do things early in the day without worrying about a hangover or being sick. Never again, thankyou!
I know its not good to look back, but I wish I had known that alcohol was the root of all my panic and paralyzing anxiety. I suppose we each have our own path to walk and I learned it when I was supposed to, but dayum....I had it for SOO long and it was horrible. Those memories of past panic attacks and being afraid to even go to a gas station are what keep me motivated and fighting in sobriety. I never want to experience that ever again.
Nothing is impossible!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: EAGAN
Posts: 792
"I'm so glad to be free of it - free to go places where they don't serve alcohol (gasp!). Free to sit in a movie for 2 hours without getting shaky, free to make arrangements to do things early in the day without worrying about a hangover or being sick. Never again, thankyou!"
Its amazing how much energy being an alcoholic takes. Its the little things like you said about being able to go to the movies and relax and enjoy it that make the biggest difference. There is so much planning that goes into catering to an addiction, its like a full time job. Arranging your life to accommodate the booze is exhausting. I was the same as you, and your post made me smile thinking about how I dont have to do those things anymore.
I was at the gym today, a Sunday at 10am and then I went to the pet store to purchase cat food. I stopped in the middle of the store and realized I was up and out doing things on a Sunday morning, anxiety fee, and confident. That wouldnt have happened 2 years ago. I would be at home, sleeping off a nightmare of a hangover, with horrible anxiety, unable to leave the house, and ordering junk food...........feeling like crap all around. What a relief!!!!!
Its amazing how much energy being an alcoholic takes. Its the little things like you said about being able to go to the movies and relax and enjoy it that make the biggest difference. There is so much planning that goes into catering to an addiction, its like a full time job. Arranging your life to accommodate the booze is exhausting. I was the same as you, and your post made me smile thinking about how I dont have to do those things anymore.
I was at the gym today, a Sunday at 10am and then I went to the pet store to purchase cat food. I stopped in the middle of the store and realized I was up and out doing things on a Sunday morning, anxiety fee, and confident. That wouldnt have happened 2 years ago. I would be at home, sleeping off a nightmare of a hangover, with horrible anxiety, unable to leave the house, and ordering junk food...........feeling like crap all around. What a relief!!!!!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: east coast
Posts: 1,711
Great thread! Thanks for starting it...I love reading about the positives others are experiencing in recovery. I will have 7 months Tuesday and I am amazed at how content I am...
1) I have wonderful supportive people in my life - new friends in AA plus old friends and some family members that I isolated from when I was drinking.
2) I feel physically great. I have more energy, look healthy, I exercise a lot more and actually am starting to feel strong.
3) More often than not, I can handle situations without letting my emotions guide me.
4) I don't make everyone else's problems all about me. No more "excuses" for me to stay drinking.
5) I have hope for the future but I live in today.
Truly filled with gratitude for all the above and more.
1) I have wonderful supportive people in my life - new friends in AA plus old friends and some family members that I isolated from when I was drinking.
2) I feel physically great. I have more energy, look healthy, I exercise a lot more and actually am starting to feel strong.
3) More often than not, I can handle situations without letting my emotions guide me.
4) I don't make everyone else's problems all about me. No more "excuses" for me to stay drinking.
5) I have hope for the future but I live in today.
Truly filled with gratitude for all the above and more.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Toronto ON
Posts: 1,180
2 years sober tomorrow.
- ran a full marathon (3:27)
- took up cycling (rode 230km just this weekend)
- lost weight but also just look healthier
- I've read a book to my two boys (7 and 9) almost every night for the past two years
- excelled at my job and have won recognition for that performance
- lived more in the last two years than I did in the previous 5
- ran a full marathon (3:27)
- took up cycling (rode 230km just this weekend)
- lost weight but also just look healthier
- I've read a book to my two boys (7 and 9) almost every night for the past two years
- excelled at my job and have won recognition for that performance
- lived more in the last two years than I did in the previous 5
Nothing is impossible!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: EAGAN
Posts: 792
Originally Posted by Tippingpoint
2 years sober tomorrow.
- ran a full marathon (3:27)
- took up cycling (rode 230km just this weekend)
- lost weight but also just look healthier
- I've read a book to my two boys (7 and 9) almost every night for the past two years
- excelled at my job and have won recognition for that performance
- lived more in the last two years than I did in the previous 5
- ran a full marathon (3:27)
- took up cycling (rode 230km just this weekend)
- lost weight but also just look healthier
- I've read a book to my two boys (7 and 9) almost every night for the past two years
- excelled at my job and have won recognition for that performance
- lived more in the last two years than I did in the previous 5
AWESOME!!!!! I loved reading this and I am proud of you. Congrats on this huge milestone and I wish you many, many more anniversaries.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Cleveland, OH
Posts: 38
These posts are great to read. I am hoping to get to this point... I know I feel better when I don't drink. I am getting back to the gym, doing things with my friends and family that don't require drinking, taking my puppy on walks... Simple things to get my mind off of it.
Nothing is impossible!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: EAGAN
Posts: 792
Originally Posted by mmc514
These posts are great to read. I am hoping to get to this point... I know I feel better when I don't drink. I am getting back to the gym, doing things with my friends and family that don't require drinking, taking my puppy on walks... Simple things to get my mind off of it.
now's the time
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 2,181
Something that is just starting to really unfold for me is the incredible power of continuity of thought. I've been sober almost four months. I have thoughts and ideas that I've been connected to that whole time... Keeping them around, modifying them, researching, adding slowly. This applies to things I'm learning about, creative threads I'm pursuing, and also big life philosophy type stuff.
In comparison I feel like while drinking my thought was chopped up into these brief fragments. I'd think in sprints in between obsessing over alcohol or flat outb blacking out. No ideas other than the most crucial would hang around for long. Either I eexecuted it very quickly or lost it. I did manage to be pretty productive with those sprints but I'm beginning to see how much nuance I was missing.
Typos the fault of my phone, inarticulate description due to my sleepiness.
In comparison I feel like while drinking my thought was chopped up into these brief fragments. I'd think in sprints in between obsessing over alcohol or flat outb blacking out. No ideas other than the most crucial would hang around for long. Either I eexecuted it very quickly or lost it. I did manage to be pretty productive with those sprints but I'm beginning to see how much nuance I was missing.
Typos the fault of my phone, inarticulate description due to my sleepiness.
Guest
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: The Deep South
Posts: 14,636
Originally Posted by fantail
Something that is just starting to really unfold for me is the incredible power of continuity of thought. I've been sober almost four months. I have thoughts and ideas that I've been connected to that whole time... Keeping them around, modifying them, researching, adding slowly. This applies to things I'm learning about, creative threads I'm pursuing, and also big life philosophy type stuff.
In comparison I feel like while drinking my thought was chopped up into these brief fragments. I'd think in sprints in between obsessing over alcohol or flat outb blacking out. No ideas other than the most crucial would hang around for long. Either I eexecuted it very quickly or lost it. I did manage to be pretty productive with those sprints but I'm beginning to see how much nuance I was missing.
)
In comparison I feel like while drinking my thought was chopped up into these brief fragments. I'd think in sprints in between obsessing over alcohol or flat outb blacking out. No ideas other than the most crucial would hang around for long. Either I eexecuted it very quickly or lost it. I did manage to be pretty productive with those sprints but I'm beginning to see how much nuance I was missing.
)
Sent from my iPhone using SoberRecovery
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
