Scott6433

I've been reading a lot of posts lately asking about the possible progression and or repercussions of this condition so with that said I would like to share a bit with you all in hopes that it may help all of us. I was recruited by several colleges in high school for both Track and Field as well as Cross Country. I ended up choosing one of the top schools for this which landed me running an average of 90 miles/week. This would include wake up calls at 5:30am well before classes for our morning runs, directly followed by a long day of classes only to wrap up with yet another run or workout followed by the weight room. Rinse and repeat every day for 4 years and all year round as I ran all 3 seasons. Very slowly during that period I was introduced to drinking, rarely granted but my introduction had been made regardless. After college I moved out of state and started playing in bands and we all know where bands have to play a lot of shows. It seemed at the time such a seamless and exciting transition as it had always been a dream of mine as a kid to be in all kinds of bands and tour etc. Well mission accomplished with some very steep repercussions. I was somewhat aware of it the whole time but that fever was only growing stronger. Believe it or not my consumption was still very mild especially compared to later years however in that time I also decided what better time to pick up smoking cigarettes? Perfect fit. Nothing makes you cooler than smoking and if your in that scene you would look like a @ss not smoking right? The progression continues as your "dream life" comes to an end and "real life" apparently picks up. I had to try and assume some responsibility and with that came my move back to my hometown. The reason you ask? To take over my Father's business. I wish i could sit here and tell you it was a construction company or a wilderness store. No it was a colossally successful Financial Insurance Agency. Let me clarify. This was not your typical State Farm or Allstate where those of you that have valid licenses would obtain your car insurance. We insured banks. Allow me to clarify "banks"...Look at your present credit or debit card and chances are that bank was a client of ours. This paints the picture for what followed next. My "job" was to simply go play golf and get drunk with the vice presidents and presidents of banks. Good customer relations right? So it continued...growing stronger each moment. I will spare you the next decade or so as it wasn't pretty but include such hits as my introduction to drug use and several unhealthy, failed relationships each lending more fuel to the fire. So I guess this is just my personal abridged version of what has landed me sitting in the living room of a small apartment in an even smaller town jobless and without a license drinking at least 30 beers and smoking about 2 packs of cigarettes/day.
Those 90 miles/week seem like a lifetime ago. So to all of you who are addressing this early on I not only congratulate you but beg you to keep moving in the right direction. Do NOT let this thing tear you down because if you do have a problem with addiction or alcohol it WILL creep in slowly but surely. You've got one shot in this world so make it count. Thank you guys for taking the time to listen and as always congratulations on your continued sobriety and or continued attempts!

ImperfectlyMe

Hey Scott thank you for your story!! Have you attempted to get back into running?

visch1

Hi. That slippery slope comes in many degrees and can be gotten off at many stages, unfortunately it's not recognized until too late. I find too many of us when we get to the later stages are not honest with ourselves about our problem. Many can't or wont believe that their best friend has turned to be their worst enemy or they can moderate their intake. Unfortunately there's a large number that just don't get it and will suffer grave results because they won't follow simple practices. Something like leading a horse to water. BE WELL

instant

Scott I am waiting for the next chapter, we both know this story can end a couple of ways

carlyle

Scott,

Thank you for sharing... I am about somewhere in the middle of your story... drinking socially but also drinking all the time, and can't imagine doing a lot of things without a beer in my hand. I am always able to convince myself that it is not bad because i never really get drunk, i just have a comfortable buzz. I have told my self twice i was done for good, but often, fear of what others will think of me if i can't have a drink because i don't have the self control to manage my drinking pulls me back in to have a few beers. then in a few weeks I am right back where i started.

Your story helps me see the reality of what the future may hold for me if I don't act on what i know the current truth IS. Thank you again.

I am 3 days in.

Dejvice

Hopefully you will take the step yourself and not drink. It takes stronger man not to drink. Give it a try.

hypochondriac

Thanks for sharing that with us Scott. For me I never really had a slow progression, I was a problem drinker from day 1, I just got good at damage control. I feel like you're bringing us in half way through the story though... you continuing to drink 30 beers a day isn't the end, the end is where you get sober and carry on with your life where you left off before drinking took over. Your post brings back memories for me because before I discovered booze I was quite a fitness fanatic. It is hard to believe now but my attitude was so different when I was young. It takes some adjustment to let go of the addiction but it is possible. Have you tried getting support before? I hope you keep us updated with your progress x