jwal89

I joined because I'm not sure what I should do. I know I'm an alcoholic and need help I'm just not sure where to start. I started drinking at 13 and it steadily got to where I had blackouts every time I drank. I have been hospitalized twice because my drinking got so bad that I wanted to end my life. Luckily I have some great friends who got me the help I needed. After being released both times I vowed never to drink again and I made it for a few months but it never failed I would start by having a drink here or there and next thing I knew I was drunk everyday. I was in denial for the longest time because it never interfered with my job. I never missed worked and was never late even though I would come hungover barely able to stand light much less perform my duties. Recently I had been doing well together until my wife and I decided to get back together. When we moved back in together I immediately started drinking again just to be around her. She also enabled my drinking by keeping the fridge stocked with all sorts of alcohol. She said she liked me better drunk so she made sure we always had some type of alcohol in the house. I'm not a picky drinker as long as it gets me drunk I don't care. I'm now 23 with a failed marriage and I just don't know what to do I am craving a drink every minute of the day.

Nighthawk8820

In order for your life to change, you have to change EVERYTHING! This means who you hang out with, your daily routine, your way of thinking. for starters, its not a great idea to start recovery by saying "Ill never drink again". The thought is overwhelming to an addicts brain and the idea of eternity is a lot to handle. Say, "I wont drink today", and do this daily. As you get stronger and more confident, you will see things change. Days turn to weeks, turn to months, and before you know it, its your 1 year sobriety anniversary and you are beaming because of all the positive things surrounding you and the changes you have made. Its a very personal and transforming journey that is much more than just putting the bottle down. Its about figuring out why you drink, learning to cope with stress and life's ups and downs with a clear head. It allows you to make choices you can be proud of without booze clouding your brain. Whatever you are feeling now, its not as bad as it all seems. Alcohol is a depressant and jades how you view your world and what you are capable of. That is the worst part of the alcoholism cycle. You drink, you feel like ****, your confidence is shot, you cant get out, the cycle repeats and repeats. You need to light that spark and build on it, and eventually you will be free of the cycle. Start by small challenges and then as you conquer them, your will feel elated and your confidence will build. If you fail, dont dwell on it or beat yourself up because this brings YOU down.Get up and try again and again, however many times it takes because this is your life and you only get one, so why not make it the best possible? Being on here is an awesome start, but it takes more. Get determined, and if you need an example, and I am by no means perfect or 100% healed, read my story http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...life-back.html

I was in the cycle, a prison I built myself and it was HORRIBLE. I feel your pain. Message me if you have any questions, I would be happy to help in any way I can.

Nonsensical

Welcome to SR!
I disagree. How's that - I disagree with your very first sentence of your very first post!
I think you are sure what you should do - YOU SHOULD STOP DRINKING.

You just don't know HOW you're going to do that yet.

Well, you're in a great place to learn how. There are lots of people succeeding at beating their addictions here, and they are using many different methods. I recommend reading here, around the various forums, and learning about those different methods. Then you can choose one that you think is a good match for you and work with it.
Now guess what? I am also going to disagree with the last sentence of your first post!
YOU want to get better.
Unfortunately, part of your brain is addicted to alcohol and it's making things very confusing in your head right now because IT's craving alcohol. You're seeking help and it's craving alcohol. Trust me, the other alcoholics and I understand that. We've been there.

But you came here to this forum seeking help - so it means there's still plenty of healthy brain left to beat this addiction. You can do this.



And I'll try not to be so disagreeable from now on.

Living

Keep reading and posting. You will find a lot of knowledge and wisdom on this board. In fact, all stories might be different, but the outcome is the same - Alcoholism will destroy your life.

You know you have a problem and now is the time to take responsibility and start a new wonderful life. No self doubt - just do it.