trying to understand relaps
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2013
Posts: 3
trying to understand relaps
I keep relapsing around the 2 3 month mark. My addiction counsellor tells me that its all part of the process, my partner and I are both in recovery and are struggling to stay clean and sober, were both in a back to the basic big book study with mine and her sponcer. Is there any thing else that we can do, to help pevent another relaps.
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,776
My addiction counsellor tells me that its all part of the process
I beg to differ. Relapse is NOT part of recovery, it's part of addiction.
CarolD used to say that you have to want to stay sober more than you want to drink. When you get to that point then you'll be able to stay sober.
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Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: The Deep South
Posts: 14,636
I highly suggest reading Terence Gorski's book Staying Sober: A Guide For Relapse Prevention. Also, Under the Influence by Milam. Those two are excellent and very enlightening. Also, consider taking L-Glutamine powder, it's an amino acid that helps with blood sugar issues and alcohol cravings (as well as sugar cravings... alcohol = liquid sugar).
In Gorski's book, he explains his views of relapse and recovery... if you aren't actively going forward in recovery, you are heading for relapse... and relapse isn't exclusively taking a drink (or using)... it's a progressive process that spiral and leads up to drinking... though you don't even have to drink to be in relapse mode. That's what truly opened up my eyes to the reality of how relapse works.
In Gorski's book, he explains his views of relapse and recovery... if you aren't actively going forward in recovery, you are heading for relapse... and relapse isn't exclusively taking a drink (or using)... it's a progressive process that spiral and leads up to drinking... though you don't even have to drink to be in relapse mode. That's what truly opened up my eyes to the reality of how relapse works.
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,435
welcome crazylegs
Relapse is common but I disagree it's part of the process of recovery.
That makes it sound both tolerable and inevitable.
Relapse is part of the addiction, but it's not part of recovery.
I think you can over think it.
The one surefire way never to relapse again is to not drink again.
it's that simple - and that hard.
Find all the support you can, work hard at your recovery - really hard - really want it....
think about what happens at the 2 to 3 month mark for you...make plans now, and be ready for it next time...
do absolutely everything you can never to pick up a drink again...and you'll be ok
D
Relapse is common but I disagree it's part of the process of recovery.
That makes it sound both tolerable and inevitable.
Relapse is part of the addiction, but it's not part of recovery.
I think you can over think it.
The one surefire way never to relapse again is to not drink again.
it's that simple - and that hard.
Find all the support you can, work hard at your recovery - really hard - really want it....
think about what happens at the 2 to 3 month mark for you...make plans now, and be ready for it next time...
do absolutely everything you can never to pick up a drink again...and you'll be ok
D
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Lakeside, Ca
Posts: 10,208
very simple thing
Originally Posted by crazylegs 
Is there any thing else that we can do, to help pevent another relaps.
don't entertain corrupt thoughts
if I ponder the thought of drinking for long
I will find myself drunk yet again
this has been proven to be a fact for me over and over
my Sponsor brought this very simple thing to my minds eye
if I ponder the thought of drinking for long
I will find myself drunk yet again
this has been proven to be a fact for me over and over
my Sponsor brought this very simple thing to my minds eye
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Lakeside, Ca
Posts: 10,208
we also had better do our part
Originally Posted by Dee74
Relapse is part of the addiction, but it's not part of recovery.
that is very true
back in 1989 I sobered up for a while
some of the ones that I knew in AA back then
got sober and have stayed sober all of this time
only God knows
but
we also had better do our part
back in 1989 I sobered up for a while
some of the ones that I knew in AA back then
got sober and have stayed sober all of this time
only God knows
but
we also had better do our part
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,435
just a reminder to everyone about medical advice
please do remember what has worked for you might not be suitable for others...
and please remember it really is best to see your Dr before starting any supplements you may read about here.
D
please do remember what has worked for you might not be suitable for others...
and please remember it really is best to see your Dr before starting any supplements you may read about here.
D
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,502
I also agree that relapse is not part of recovery.
If you've relapsed, it's important to figure out what happened, what triggered it and why. Then make a plan to avoid that next time. Make lots of plans for the 2-3 month time frame when you feel vulnerable. Remind yourself that drinking is not an option.
If you've relapsed, it's important to figure out what happened, what triggered it and why. Then make a plan to avoid that next time. Make lots of plans for the 2-3 month time frame when you feel vulnerable. Remind yourself that drinking is not an option.
~sb
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: MD
Posts: 15,966
I had to fully surrender and know that I couldn't drink again. Until I surrendered fully, I was a chronic relapser.
I worked the steps as in back to basics, all 12 in 2 days with the gift of desperation along with willingness to work those steps.
those steps saved my life
I worked the steps as in back to basics, all 12 in 2 days with the gift of desperation along with willingness to work those steps.
those steps saved my life
Grateful
Join Date: May 2013
Location: NC
Posts: 1,763
Originally Posted by SoberJennie
I highly suggest reading Terence Gorski's book Staying Sober: A Guide For Relapse Prevention. Also, Under the Influence by Milam. Those two are excellent and very enlightening. Also, consider taking L-Glutamine powder, it's an amino acid that helps with blood sugar issues and alcohol cravings (as well as sugar cravings... alcohol = liquid sugar).
In Gorski's book, he explains his views of relapse and recovery... if you aren't actively going forward in recovery, you are heading for relapse... and relapse isn't exclusively taking a drink (or using)... it's a progressive process that spiral and leads up to drinking... though you don't even have to drink to be in relapse mode. That's what truly opened up my eyes to the reality of how relapse works.
In Gorski's book, he explains his views of relapse and recovery... if you aren't actively going forward in recovery, you are heading for relapse... and relapse isn't exclusively taking a drink (or using)... it's a progressive process that spiral and leads up to drinking... though you don't even have to drink to be in relapse mode. That's what truly opened up my eyes to the reality of how relapse works.
Guest
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: The Deep South
Posts: 14,636
Grungehead, haha, I'm living proof too... was sober twice before, once for a year... so it took me a couple of tries before pulling things all together... Prochaska's Stages of Change sure do ring true
Grateful
Join Date: May 2013
Location: NC
Posts: 1,763
Originally Posted by SoberJennie
Grungehead, haha, I'm living proof too... was sober twice before, once for a year... so it took me a couple of tries before pulling things all together... Prochaska's Stages of Change sure do ring true
Well, that's 14 years of sobriety there 
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