trikyriky

Yea Its A Holiday , So What. Im Trying Not To Think This Way But It sucks. My So Called Best Friend Is Having A Cook Out. I Practically Have To Invite Myself If I Want To Go. My Daughters Going As Well As The Grankids. Noone Asked Me , Even Though I Do A Lot For Them. They Alway call When Their Cars Are Broke. Im Stressing Over This. Holidays For Me Were Always Spent Hiding Away , Using

Ptcapote

Hey Riky, I feel ya on that one today. I am not a parent or grandparent (thank goodness for those potential kids or grandkids) but now that the word is out among my friends and family that I am in recovery, I am also getting what feels like the cold shoulder. I realize it is awkward for some of them but completely blowing me off kind of hurts. I walked next door to the neighbor's yard an hour ago when my dog ran over there and saw that they were setting up for a BBQ and filling the coolers with beer, etc. The husband was actually trying to stand in front of the damn cooler to hide what was in it! Like if I saw there was beer out in the open I might start foaming at the mouth and attack his leg to get to it. But after twenty minutes of conversation no one even hinted that I might be invited over. And I have spent each summer next door to them for the past four years. Jeez...

It's funny because I don't think I have even ever been over there for a holiday. Like you, in the end I used to hide in my house and drink alone on holidays.

Anyway, yeah, kind of feels pretty awful but I know that I would feel even more awful if I got drunk today.

Still, kind of tempted to walk over there again, past the beer cooler, and start twitching uncontrollably but that would be mean and childish.

But it might feel good momentarily

Hang in there and as far as saying "yes" every time they ask you to fix their cars? Start saying "no" sometimes. Boundaries are an essential part of recovery too.

1Dayatatyme

I want you to know that I am so grateful for your support, friendship and posts here on Sober Recovery... your true brothers and sisters in recovery are glad that you are "one of us"... so here is a "virtual" bar-b-q for those of us who are clean and sober today! :

trikyriky

Being Single In Recovery Has It's Pros And Cons. Ain't It Funny Though How Those Closest Do the Least. Although I know My Daughter Has The Two Kids And Boyfriend To Do for . I Don't Exactly Know How She Feels About Me And My Addict Life . She Dose Bring It Up And I Have Lied To Her Before. Honesty Would Make Me Feel A Lot Better And I Am Working On that. It Can't Be Easy For Her , Knowing Everyone Knows Her Dad Was A Crackhead......

wpainterw

I get the same way. Sometimes finding myself in restaurants alone looking at other folks sitting together, seemingly having lots of fun and companionship. Don't feel much inclination to drink but years ago that's certainly what I'd do. So how to handle a holiday? Maybe take a good walk with the dog or if it's raining, seek out a friend. Maybe there are other lonely folks out there. Watch a movie on TV. Be careful since that crazy part of your mind might try to set you up for "just one" drink. It won't be "just one". "Just one" never helps and the alternative is the slippery slope, which leads to disaster.

W.

mecanix

I think isolation is what i strived for when i was drinking . I guess a lot of people got used to me hiding away and are now unaware i want / need to get out and about nowdays .

Being a normal person still feels awkward sometimes but i'm sure if i keep walking the walk and practaicing the art of friendship it will become second nature eventually .

Bestwishes, M

wpainterw

Memorial Day: Went down to my family's gravesite. Only my dad's grave was visible. Maybe because they had to know who it was in order to put the little flag on it as he was a WWI veteran. The rest, my mom, my sister, my nephew were all covered over with ivy so you couldn't see the names any more. I'll go over there later today or tomorrow to pull the ivy off. I'm 86. Who will pull the ivy off when I'm gone. Will the ivy grow over me too? In the end everything is forgotten.

W.

trikyriky

Painter , Thanks For Shariing That , Sincerely

deeker

Holiday Blues, another lie ur addiction wants you to believe, To make u feel sorry for urself and use. Don't believe it triky. Hang tough. it's a day to give tribute to our fallen soldiers. Not a day to celebrate.