I messed up big time!
 

I'm the biggest f**ked up person. On saturday I ruined my life because of ALCOHOL! I put my grandmother in the hospital because of me. I lost my girlfriend that I was with for 3 years and were about to get engaged. Alcohol makes me a really sick person. I can't imagine if my grandmother dosnt make I will never be able to forgive my self. :c021:

I had been an alcoholic for almost 2 years, now it has messed up everything for me. I wish I wasn't this selfish and shouldve quit it a while ago. I guess I'll have to learn my lesson this way. If you're out there and can't quit please listen to me!! u don't want this happening to u and feeling this ashamed and guilty over the nastiest creation on earth. I'm only 23 years old and I'm learning it the hard way. I wish i didn't have chose this path, its far most the biggest regret of my life. I don't how I became an alcoholic but now i admit that i am one and its time to go sober.

Like I said i'm only 23, got my bachelors degree in finance, working at the bank and blessed with a wonderful family that loves. Now because this past saturday my life has done a 360. So the story goes like this, My girlfriend had a fight with her mom over me it was because of me being drunk made this all cause it. She yelled and fought with her, supposibily her mom told me she was in the hospital, i checked every hospital in my region, no where to be found. I went to her house and asked her mom where is she, i had drank even more so i was already drunk, driving, and disrespecting and yelling at her mom. I dented her mom's car cuz she didn't want to tell me where she was. My cousins come to get me so i don't get arrested. I don't listen to them when they wanted my keys and take me out of there, they let me drive. As soon as we hit the expressway they notice im losing my focus on the car so they stop me after were off the express way. We get out of the car and they start punching me and hitting me. My grandma who's 80 years old comes to save me and tell em not to hit me and stuff, and there pushing n shoving me, unfortunately my grandma loses her balance and falls backwards on her head and is unconscious, we call 911 and shes taken to the hospital. I'm drunk, acting violent, try to commit suicide but my cousins stop me and save me, calls the cops and im baker acted. had to spend the night over to the hospital being detoxed.
My girlfriend is taken away to another city with her sister because thats where her sister lives. I spoke to her friend i found out she's in the hospital because she has not eaten and on a iv drip. Her mom hates me now, so does her sister i bet no doubt. I wonder if she hates me, im sure she don't half the story what occurred that night. I messed up everything, dearly i love this girl so much i can't even imagine losing her. I hope everything gets okay, and my grandma comes back to me like she was before. I'm really not worried about my relationship because i can't do anything anyways since her mom wants a restraining order on me. I hope we can solve it when the time is right. Alcohol has ****** up my life and I'm done with this nasty ****. Im going sober forever, i just have to be patient for everything to be ok again once again for me, i have to prove to the world what im about and this wasn't me because alochol had taken over my life.

I need all u guys support to get me through this withdrawals. 2 days sober lets make this happened!

Sorry to hear of your troubles. There is a lot going on here - it sounds like you need to make sobriety your number one priority right now. Do you have any support systems in place, or are you doing this alone? Either way thanks for coming, good luck, and I'd encourage you to browse the forums too.

This can be a new begining. Only you can decide. I hope you can find your way. SR is a great place to explore your relationship with the juice.

hey there,
good you're seeing the damage that you're causing when drinking.
good that you're clear on that.
even better you want to change and are wanting to be sober.
lots of good conversations and people doing the same all over this board.
welcome to you.

First, I hope your grandma is okay, I will say a prayer for her. Second, how are you planning to stay sober? I know you have had all these terrible things happen but in my experience, even when the **** hit the fan, I could get sober but not STAY sober. Today I use AA and SR. That's whats working for me.

Hi and welcoem Ebd

I really hope your grandmother will be OK.

Sounds like this is a pretty big wake up call....but the good news is there is always always a new beginning :)

Do you have a plan to stop drinking and stay stopped?

D

Wow ebd that is a rough night.

I really hope your grandmother is okay. You should be proud of her for trying to help you. She sounds tough and I have confidence.

yeah, im on day 2, its tough but i will battle this for her and my family. i miss her.

You also must remember that you must stay sober for yourself as well. The last two times I quit, it was for this person or that person. This time it was for myself, and it feels different, and I know I will keep being sober this time.
Also, I will keep your grandma in my prayers.

yes ill have to do it for me specially. how long does this process take?

The withdrawls? That could last anywhere from around a week or a bit longer. But, staying sober is a lifelong commitment.

I sure hope your Grandma will be ok. You hang in there and take one day at a time and the fog will lift and you can get your life back on track again. Good that you have learned a lesson from all this. God bless!