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To those wondering if they are really alcoholics or not

Old 05-18-2013, 10:45 AM
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To those wondering if they are really alcoholics or not

This is a little long, but...
I started visiting SR back in January of this year. At that point I didn't know if I was really an alcoholic or not, but I knew I was drinking way too much on an almost daily basis. I had been laid off of work back in June 2012 after my job closed due to the poor economy. At that point I was 28 years old, and had been working at this location for 7.5 years- pretty much my whole adult life. I'd let myself fall into a comfortable pattern, and when it was taken away, I didn't know what to do with myself. Change has always been hard for me, and I hadn't prepared myself mentally for the transition that was going to happen.
Long story short, I got smashed for the first time in my life on July 4th of last year. I stayed drunk for the next 6 months. I knew the whole time how dangerous it was to continue drinking that way. Addictive behaviors run in my family, and I've watched my own brother's struggles.
Finally in January I found SR and was able to stop the insanity. I read so many posts about other people's experiences with alcohol. There were so many scary and heartbreaking stories, and it helped to see where I was headed. But honestly I felt like an intruder at times because here I was with my 6 month pity session, while so many others would talk about their years and decades of alcoholism.
I was sober from January 4- April 25. Then I drank a whole bottle of wine by myself in one night. The next day I freaked out and was so ashamed of myself and feared going back to that dark place. But the more I thought about it, I didn't even enjoy it all that much. There wasn't even that happy numb I remembered. And it honestly just made me so exhausted the next day that I can't see myself drinking again anytime soon- I forgot how little you get done the day after!
The conclusion I've come to is I'm probably not an alcoholic... at this point. But the seed has been planted. It would be so easy for me to use alcohol again the next time a stressful event happens in my life. And I can't be sure that I would just "be okay" after a 6 month pity binge.
So to those who are questioning whether they are or aren't alcoholics, I say it doesn't matter. If you use alcohol abusively in anyway, you're just sending yourself down the pathway to alcoholism and all the misery that comes with it. Choose a different route because eventually there won't be any more detours.
Thanks for reading if you made it this far
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Old 05-18-2013, 11:07 AM
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The label doesn't really matter. If alcohol is causing you any problems, then maybe it's time to stop.
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Old 05-18-2013, 11:12 AM
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Thank you for your post and great insight-in knowing that an alcoholic or an alcohol abuser can be just as disastrous.

Make good use of SR here, it is a large cyber recover orientated social network with a great many caring people
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Old 05-18-2013, 11:33 AM
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Originally Posted by SoberForMySon View Post
The label doesn't really matter. If alcohol is causing you any problems, then maybe it's time to stop.
This. If it's problem, then stopping is good idea.
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Old 05-18-2013, 02:15 PM
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Thanks for the comments. I should probably clarify that I haven't drank since April 26th and I hope to stay that way for as long as I can. No need to tempt fate.
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Old 05-18-2013, 03:00 PM
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I totally agree with you.

I have always believed that if alcohol causes you to be unhappy, then why continue with it?
You can waste many years trying to decide if your an alcoholic all the while continuing to drink.

I know my drinking gave me an idea of what life might be like if I continued. I didn't like it so I stopped.

I am glad I got off when I did!

My best to you
x
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