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A bit lost

Old 05-13-2013, 02:03 PM
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A bit lost

Been messing myself up with booze for years and its got to stop. But it just won't. I am so angry that I keep doing this its so self destructive. Booze gets in the way of all that is good about me and my life, without it I can't cope with it I am unable to cope.
I am lost for a way out
I am the only one who can deal with this but I don't know how , if I don't drink I won't drink, if I do I won't stop until I send myself to sleep. How do I not have that first one. Why is it so powerful?

Enough
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Old 05-13-2013, 02:08 PM
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Welcome, Grok!

Everyone has to find their own path to sobriety, but AVRT helped me a lot. You can Google it since I can't link to it here.

You're right, it's the first drink that's the killer. I spent 25 years drinking, and the last few were the worst. Literally drunk every night, 365 days a year for years. But now I haven't had a drink in 7 months and I don't miss it a bit. That's mind boggling! I didn't think I could live, or would want to live, without drinking. It just goes to show you anyone can do it!
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Old 05-13-2013, 02:30 PM
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For me I had to change my routine.
I used to sit on the sofa, glass, television, until I passed out in bed.
Every morning I would swear no drink today.
By 4 pm I was at the booze shop.

I got off the sofa, got busy, did anything and everything to avoid drinking.
I really wanted it.
I also took it one day at a time.
I said to myself on certain bad days 'if I feel like this tomorrow, then I can have a drink. Just not today'.

And I can hand on heart say, there was never anything that was bad enough to stop drinking.

I do think recognising your addictive voice is a good way of dealing with cravings.
There are lots of threads about it on here that you can read.

Recognising that the thoughts 'one will not hurt' or 'I can't have a problem as I have done a week without a drink' are not real and to ignore them and not act on them.

I wish you the best
Xx
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Old 05-13-2013, 02:35 PM
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Hi Grok. If you want to stop, you can. Just don't take that first drink.
Will it be easy? No. Will it be worth the pain? Definitely.

I'm 15 days sober and I haven't felt this good for years. I was drinking 3-7 days a week for 20 years. First week sober was physically and mentally drop dead awful. After that it started getting easier every day.

I stopped cold turkey and the only help I had was this site. Everytime something frustrated me I came here to post and read posts and didn't stop until the cravings did...

I hope you'll find your way. We'll be here to help you
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Old 05-13-2013, 02:47 PM
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Thumbs up

Hi, Grok.

Awesome handle... brings to mind "Stranger in a Strange Land" by Robert A. Heinlein.

It can be tough to get started putting down that drink for the last time. No options for drinking can exist, in my opinion, if you want an early success with quitting. You don't have to want sobriety as much as you must refuse to have any future drunks as any kind of an option.

Once you can be sure of not wanting to be drunk again, then how you keep that going is really up to you -- so many ways work. Follow your heart, and you'll soon discover quitting is easier then you might have imagined.

SR is a great place to discuss the different ways and methods or lack there of going forward.

Anyways, know that it is totally possible for you to quit and be done with drinking, now and forever.
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Old 05-13-2013, 02:51 PM
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Grok, I know how you feel - you can't imagine life with alcohol anymore and you can't imagine it without it. Keep reading around the board, you will find a lot of information and support about quitting. It is a tough road to quit, but the only alternative is to keep drinking and making things worse and worse. Good luck and welcome!
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Old 05-13-2013, 02:55 PM
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You know 18 months ago I knew I needed to change, I changed my diet, I got fitter than I've been in years despite the booze trying to sabotage me at every turn. I've been a hard drinker for 30 years, all I need to do is stop, just stop, so what makes me keep doing this stupid thing, I want to or I would not be here, but I seem unable, crazy, bloody crazy.
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Old 05-13-2013, 03:05 PM
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I think for me the big picture of life without drink is far too large. I have to break it down to a much smaller picture. Today I will not drink. This hour, I will not drink. Whatever it takes to make it palatable is how you start.
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Old 05-13-2013, 03:06 PM
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Originally Posted by Grok View Post
I've been a hard drinker for 30 years, all I need to do is stop, just stop, so what makes me keep doing this stupid thing, I want to or I would not be here, but I seem unable, crazy, bloody crazy.
It's called alcoholism. We've all felt like that, I know I have, many times! The best thing to do is focus on not drinking today and seek out support to help you deal with the anxiety and cravings (post here, go to an AA meeting, talk to someone, etc.) Before you know it you have a few days sober and some of the craziness starts to go away. But in order to quit drinking, you gotta quit drinking. Hang in there
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Old 05-14-2013, 01:57 AM
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Thanks,
It's 9.00 am here in the uk, today will be day 1, it's has to be.
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Old 05-14-2013, 02:06 AM
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Hi, Grok.

Hold on your Day 1. Take one day at a time, forget about the past, don't overwhelm yourself about the future. First days are tough, but it's getting better.

Hang in here, post anytime, you have all our support.
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Old 05-14-2013, 02:23 AM
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Hi Grok,

One day at a time. That is all you need to remember for now. 24 hours.
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