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"You're just like..."

Old 05-11-2013, 08:06 PM
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"You're just like..."

BLAH....
Does anyone else partner feel a great deal of empowerment because they DONT have a problem? I have a hard enough time staying sober with everyday problems let alone the cocky remarks.
I admit my problem. I blame myself. I try and KNOW he offers me no support ( he actually says I will fail) But when life issues arise, my family and friends call me...because believe it or not...Im a human, Im smart and Im quite rational. Im the youngest of three sisters and treated as the oldest. I enjoy helping people...So WHY...when ANY issue arises and I tell whom ever it is that theyre in the wrong... my husband then uses that twards me. "youre just like ....." IM NOT....IM NOT DOING ANYTHING THAT THEYRE DOING!!! Is it a way to continue to punish me? Make me feel like **** just in case ive regained a portion of my dignity? Im NOT like X Y Z. Im a very good person. I love everyone. I do ALL that I can , even for the man who chooses kicking me rather than lifting me up.
THIS.... makes me want a drink. Maybe this is why people need support. Because when Im doing good.... I get knocked down....and have no one to help me up.
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Old 05-11-2013, 08:18 PM
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You need to help yourself up, and prove to yourself you can beat this. As for your husband, well perhaps you should hold a mirror up to him and ask him to take a good look at himself! I bet you that he won't like what he sees.

You can beat this
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Old 05-11-2013, 08:50 PM
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I feel for you hrich, I have people in my life that try to knock me down as well. It's very frustrating. It makes me want to go try to knock them down. But I'm really not that kind of person, I'd rather build someone up. If you feel you don't deserve it, just remember you don't have to take it. Try to work on ways to confront it when it happens, like "You know, I really don't appreciate that (smartass) comment." If you do it enough times, eventually they should get the message. You've got to do whatever you can to take care of yourself, especially if it makes you want to drink.

You could also try talking to a professional about this stuff, that can help.
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Old 05-11-2013, 08:58 PM
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Stay strong hrich!

Like they say "if somebody is trying to bring you down, he/she is already below you"

Concentrate on you. You know you're doing the right thing.

We're here to help you
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Old 05-11-2013, 09:05 PM
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Stay strong, you are awesome. Please don't listen to anyone making snide or cocky or degrading remarks to you. Anyone who does that, (there are no exceptions to who it is) is dealing with their own issues and those cocky remarks are really what they're telling themselves. The only things you need to listen to are how awesome you are doing. You are awesome, remember that!

I agree with Mirage, perhaps counseling can help with resolving that issue. Stay strong!
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Old 05-11-2013, 10:27 PM
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Thank you for your comments.... Im so overwhelmed with emotions I dont know what to do. I HATE that the ONE person in my life that is supposed to be by me...is the ONLY person in my life that makes me feel like garbage. And the SAME person in my life that will call my drinking out to the world as if it were asked for.
I still havnt gotten a drink...so thats good.
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Old 05-13-2013, 09:40 PM
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You and your husband should read Joel Osteen, Become a better You...especially him. It is a fantastic book, and many many times Joel references not kicking people down, but picking them up. These type of people have some deep rooted issues going on. It actually is sad. I know our situations are the same pretty much, unfortunately, I can't even get my husband to get past a chapter of Co-dependent no more book, so Joel Osteen is out of the question. But you may like it, if you like to read!!
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Old 05-13-2013, 09:46 PM
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Thanks Committed2013-

Ill have to check it out on my kindle! I'm sure I'll be reading it alone. But Im ok with that...as long as it helps me. =)
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