Where do I begin?
 

Hi~
My name is Polly and I have been supporting, enabling, co-dependent upon and may or may not have loved an Alcoholic named Rubin. It has been a 2year turmultuous relationship and I am standing here today-stunned, humiliated and feeling very stupid. For I had no idea about what alcoholism really is and the power of it. I know in my head, the right thing to do is to leave him (which I have done) and let him go from my thoughts... but my heart and my tummie just ache inside. I am so sad. I just want my heart to catch up to my head....

Hi Polly.

I'm sorry you are going through such a hard time. We have a forum specifically dedicated to friends and families of alcoholics. Here is the link:

Friends and Family of Alcoholics - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

Best to you.