Bad night
 

Well I've known for quite a while I have a serious problem with alcohol last night I drank so much at the casino I blacked out and my fiancé left me today for my actions while drinking so today is my day one I feel absolutely terrible that's she been so hurt by my drinking so I signed up here hoping to ease some of the pain and just get through this first night I know tommorrow will be harder and I guess I'm just looking for some advice from fellow alcoholics.:c021:

Welcome Alco. I'm sorry you're hurting right now, but you've learned something valuable. Maybe that's what needed to happen so you can begin to heal. Glad to have you here with us - you're never alone.

Hi Alco

I'm sorry for what bought you here but I'm glad you found us.

I think once we accept the damage alcohol does to us, and we resolve not to drink anymore, thats actually the start of a great new chapter. We start to get our lives back :)

You'll find a lot of support here. I know you have a lot to think about right now but try to focus on staying sober for now - in my experience, everything else will tend to fall into place behind that.

D

I'm sorry that you're in a bad place, but you can take action to change things.

Welcome Alco,

It always amazes me the glamorous settings that some people have their alcoholic episodes in. As casino? They let you in? Mate, at the end of my drinking I could barely get into the sleaziest bar, and then I would likely be thrown out or beaten up or both.

I was wondering from your post what makes you think you are alcoholic. All kinds of people get drunk and do stupid things, look at students (speaking from my own country) but most atre not alcoholic. What is it about you drinking history that means this current problem wasn't just a random act of drunken stupidity?

Today is my second day and this is merely my first post but welcome. I see coming here as a first step that takes courage and self-awreness and am proud of you.
Good luck to you and you can message me anytime you need to talk, I could use an outlet. Today and last night have also been very hard on me. I lost a fiance to drinking it was the reverse but an entirely different scenario. Best wishes and positivity sent your way,
KA ((((((Hugs))))))

Welcome, alco. I just found this site yesterday and I think it's going to be tremendously helpful in terms of understanding my addiction and supporting me as I deal with it. Everyone is so welcoming. I'm glad you found this site.

Court ordered programs for alcohol addiction and all the many problems I've had while drinking I've never voluntarily gone to any of these programs including inpatient court orderd until now

Alco,

I can COMPLETELY relate to you right now. If you go back and read some of my previous posts you will see that I came here for EXACTLY the same reason. My drinking has lead to my fiancee leaving me. She left me April 11th, and we were supposed to get married May 11th of this year (this saturday). It completely CRUSHED me to begin with, and it still hurts like hell! I don't think it's going to get any easier anytime soon, however the bottom of the bottle won't make it easier either. For some reason it took the loss of my fiancee to realize I'm an alcoholic...pretty sad! However I have come to realize that she had no idea who I was because I was hiding the drinking for our whole relationship. She had no idea the extent of my problems. It's not fair to drag someone you love into a relationship like that. Now I don't know the extent of your drinking, but mine got to the point of almost drinking daily. I have had ZERO contact with her since she found me passed out and walked out of my life. It's gotten slightly easier day by day, however it will be a roller coaster. I won't go into a whole lot more detail here, but if you want to talk please feel free to PM me at any time.

Good luck and keep coming back here. There is a lot of support!

Thanks Alco, I had that sort of stuff too, even a court order banning me from drinking at the age of 16. Got drunk to celebrate that one.
I fought the alcoholic label right to the end. i would rather have been a certified lunatic. But in the end it did not matter so much what I did when drinking (we all have dfferent stories on that front) it was the fact that I had lost the power of choice in drink.

When I drank I couldn't guarantee when I would stop, and when I tried to stay off the booze (I'm so ashamed I'll never drink again!) I would find myself drinking within a few hours, often without any conscious thought. Alternatively I would drink under the delusion that this time will be different - sometimes it was, but not often. It just got worse.

Once I stopped drinking for nearly three months and found I could not function. Life without booze was worse than life with it. Booze was my solution. If alcohol was the problem, then I should have got better.

So it's about control and choice.

Couldn't have said it better! So much wisdom in this one simple post!:c029: