A fine line between despair and ecstasy
 

To feel despair... For me was the skin peeling of coming down.

To feel ecstasy... For me was the rush of emotions. Yes drugs for me was emotional. Seemingly.

For this addict it was a very fine line. Crack. Cocaine. Vodka. Ecstasy. Sometimes all at once. Yes. All.

One moment was high with the next.... In Utter despair. Real despair in my mind.

How did I stop that? How did I say no? How can I ever feel far enough away?

The slight of hand. The trickery of it all. Addicts know.

I have been on SR for over a year now. It has been a savior. I love the moments when the normalcy of my life now hangs with a backdrop of chaos. It makes it all the more savory.

I am getting ready to grill veggies. Chicken and shrimp skewers. And a smile. Grin even.

I had. I lost. I have again. For this moment only. But I have.

Drugs made me feel good briefly but have a large downside .

Sorting myself and my life out makes me feel good most of the time .

Today is all we truely know we have . This dosn't mean i turn into a hedonistic nhillist but rather makes me savour the sweet and good gloriously .

Bestwishes, M

Weasel. You are doing well. Your dinner sounds very pleasant. You have a lot to be grateful for, and so do I.

Mizz. So do you. So do you.

Hey m! Downside is an understatement.

I have the kitties on the porch. They are sacked out in the sun. Like me. I have to pick my lazy but up to chop veggies.

So happy to be here today. Normally I would hide from SR so I could get high or drink. But present today.

K

As always, I enjoy your posts. Glad you're doing so well.

Thanks PL!