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Locking down this last [FINAL] relapse...

Old 05-03-2013, 08:04 PM
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Red face Locking down this last [FINAL] relapse...

Hi,
some of you know me. I didn't want to post today - or yesterday - partly because I feel weak and sick, so may make little sense. That's the bad part. The good part is: I've put down the drink as of yesterday (Day 1), am only part way through the late morning of Day 2. This after my latest relapse of about 5 weeks, daily 1 bottle then 2 bottles white wine.

I'm detoxing mostly by myself here at home this time, mainly because the possible rehabs have long waiting lists currently - of up to four weeks. I know, given my age (57), and past drinking history and, what resuming- drinking has been doing to my ancient body, including to other health conditions including emphysema, anxiety and depression and spinal arthritis - even JUST in five weeks......even a few more days or weeks of drinking-to-stave-off withdrawals ('maintenance' drinking) would lead to me being close to death or dead.

So, I calculated - well, remembered - that my last two rehab detoxes over the past 16 months were relatively mild. Sure, sick, weak, a bit of shaking, brain fog, some sweating etc, but I didn't even need very much at all of the offered Valium both times.

[PLEASE NOTE: in the rules and spirit of SR, I am decidedly NOT asking for nor offering advice about home detox!!! I am simply letting you know that I've put down the drink and am safe. Sick - mostly weak as a kitten, as finding it hard to eat, extremely sleepy and fatigued, etc, very occasional palpitations but nothing too alarming. But safe. If I am really ill beyond this, I'll call an ambulance. But so far, not too bad. ]

A local friend is going to visit me with some Vit B1 later today or tomorrow depending on her commitments. Even my long-ago-divorced ex-husband, father of my daughters, is flying in from Perth for next weekend to visit me. First time in 23 years.....I'm paying for his airfare (not cheap) but I figure: well, if I kept on drinking for another 5 weeks until a rehab place, apart from the health risks to me, I would have spent that amount of money on pouring the blasted poison down my throat - to put it politely :-)

I'm back on the horse of recovery - whom I like to think of a Clydesdale (big, gentle, hard working and dependable) :-)
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Old 05-03-2013, 08:08 PM
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Originally Posted by bemyself View Post
Hi,
some of you know me. I didn't want to post today - or yesterday - partly because I feel weak and sick, so may make little sense. That's the bad part. The good part is: I've put down the drink as of yesterday (Day 1), am only part way through the late morning of Day 2. This after my latest relapse of about 5 weeks, daily 1 bottle then 2 bottles white wine.

I'm detoxing mostly by myself here at home this time, mainly because the possible rehabs have long waiting lists currently - of up to four weeks. I know, given my age (57), and past drinking history and, what resuming- drinking has been doing to my ancient body, including to other health conditions including emphysema, anxiety and depression and spinal arthritis - even JUST in five weeks......even a few more days or weeks of drinking-to-stave-off withdrawals ('maintenance' drinking) would lead to me being close to death or dead.

So, I calculated - well, remembered - that my last two rehab detoxes over the past 16 months were relatively mild. Sure, sick, weak, a bit of shaking, brain fog, some sweating etc, but I didn't even need very much at all of the offered Valium both times.

[PLEASE NOTE: in the rules and spirit of SR, I am decidedly NOT asking for nor offering advice about home detox!!! I am simply letting you know that I've put down the drink and am safe. Sick - mostly weak as a kitten, as finding it hard to eat, extremely sleepy and fatigued, etc, very occasional palpitations but nothing too alarming. But safe. If I am really ill beyond this, I'll call an ambulance. But so far, not too bad. ]

A local friend is going to visit me with some Vit B1 later today or tomorrow depending on her commitments. Even my long-ago-divorced ex-husband, father of my daughters, is flying in from Perth for next weekend to visit me. First time in 23 years.....I'm paying for his airfare (not cheap) but I figure: well, if I kept on drinking for another 5 weeks until a rehab place, apart from the health risks to me, I would have spent that amount of money on pouring the blasted poison down my throat - to put it politely :-)

I'm back on the horse of recovery - whom I like to think of a Clydesdale (big, gentle, hard working and dependable) :-)
Sounds like you have it all figured out.
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Old 05-03-2013, 08:29 PM
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Praying for you! Sounds like you have a good plan
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