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Old 04-29-2013, 12:35 PM
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Question Newbie

Hi All

I'm not usually one to post on forums, but I've got nowhere else to turn.

So a little background about me. I'll not give my real name (for obvious reasons), but you can call me Louise. My partner has been trying to get off heroin now since July 2012. He's tried methadone, and is now on a suboxone programme, however I have found various drug paraphernalia countless times so I know he's still using. I've confronted him (I don't know whether this just makes things worse or not - I really don't know what to do for the best anymore) and he has admitted that occasionally he slips up. But I now suspect it is happening more than just occasionally. I feel like he repeatedly lies to me. I have tried to be supportive of him, I have stood by him through so much, and all I want is the truth from him but still he goes on lying. Telling me he's at work, then sneaking off to get his fix. Lying about money. I've found bank statements showing money withdrawn from cashpoints in areas he has no reason to be in, hundreds of pounds just disappearing.

I just don't know how to help him anymore. He attends counselling (supposedly), but I feel like I don't get any support through all of this. I can't understand how he's been on the suboxone programme for so long, yet it doesn't seem like his prescription ever gets reduced. And if the suboxone is supposed to stop the withdrawals, why then does he still feel the need to use heroin? It must be because he enjoys it still, and if that's the case and he can't stop using it even while he's on a suboxone programme, I worry that he's never going to be able to do it when he comes off the programme.

Can someone please help who knows a bit about how it all works? How often are they supposed to be tested for heroin use, because it doesn't seem like he's going to the centre very often. This means he's able to use heroin, and clear it out of his system before he does get tested.

I feel absolutely at the end of the road right now, I can't see things getting any better.
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Old 04-29-2013, 04:44 PM
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Guessing no one's up for talking
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Old 04-29-2013, 04:48 PM
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Hey, you might try the Forum Friends & Family. Good luck, and keep trying; it's just a fluke no one has responded yet. Everyone here is very supportive. I can't help;I'm new to recovery myself but there is plenty of wisdom at SR
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Old 04-29-2013, 04:51 PM
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Welcome to the site. I guess you have proof positive that he's using and lying about it. I guess your next decision might be if you can continue to tolerate that kind of life. I'd like to see you have a happy life, we all deserve one. We have a forum here for friends and family that might interest you.

If you post your situation there, you'll find lots of people who have been in your shoes.

Friends and Family of Substance Abusers - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
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Old 04-29-2013, 05:08 PM
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Welcome!

You might want to check out AlAnon or NarAnon as a support for yourself, and hopefully you can focus on you.
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Old 04-29-2013, 05:11 PM
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((Alone)) - Welcome to SR, though sorry for what has brought you here. The forum linked above is full of people who have loved ones who are addicts, and has helped me a lot, over the years.

Hugs and prayers,

Amy
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Old 04-30-2013, 12:46 AM
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Hi everyone, and thanks. I will check your suggestions out
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