Mirage74

I am on my 8th night of sobriety, and I just don't feel good. I am irritable and unhappy. So, this is sobriety. I realize this is why I drank, because when I am sober and I irritable and unhappy, and I don't know the solution. I don't know if I feel this way because I'm only on day 8 and my body is still missing alcohol or if I am just generally an irritable and miserable person and I have to live with it. I just want to feel good. I ate a candy bar and drinking soda for sugar, but it's just not the same. Why is this so hard? When does it get better? When I sober up, I realize what a miserable person I am. Then my addiction kicks in and tells me I may as well just drink if reality is this miserable.

I went to an AA meeting earlier and I hope I can find some answers there. One thing is, the meeting was on "spirituality" and your relationship with a higher power. I don't even know if I believe in God, it's something I wrestle with. I even watch shows on the science channels that try to answer this question. How can a higher power help me get sober if I don't even know if I believe in one? Anyway, that's a whole nother issue...

Ugh, sorry, had to vent..

Dee74

No this is early recovery

I dunno how long you drank for Miurage74, but I bet it was longer than 8 days.
Give yourself and your body and mind time to heal.

It took me about 30 days to feel human again - hopefully it will take you less time...but things will get better - would any of us still be in recovery if it didn't?

D

veryready

Hang in there. 8 Days is a pretty huge accomplishment. That's over a full week which is tough. In my experience, I had a hard time in the second week, but don't let that discourage you. I really think the alcoholism realizes its losing the battle at that point and really tries to make a stand. Don't let it win. It's worth it and you are doing great. One day at a time.

Mirage74

Thanks, D, I really needed to hear that right now.

neferkamichael

Mirage, Night 8 - Going stir crazy, When does it start to get better? You are FANTASTIC. Congratulations. The way I look at my 1006 days sober is I just suffer through the bad feelings and cravings. The awfulness of it all has diminished considerably and life is so much better. Rootin for ya.

Mirage74

Thanks nefer, that really helps. That's the thing I think I realize this time, what you said above. I realize I just have to suck it up and go through these bad times without drinking. The scary thing is, drinking works - temporarily. When I drink, these feelings melt away and I get drunk and feel good, at least for a while. I just can't deal with the consequences. I guess this is what "Dealing with life on life's terms means". I just hope life gets better. Ya'll give me hope..thanks

HitRockBottom70

Mirage, Congrats on day 8. The first month was pretty rocky for me. After that it was kinda like a roller coaster for another month. It got a little better each week though. Keep pushing forward, you will not regret it.

bluejay23

Congratulations on day 8! It does get easier. These terrible times really help to not take the good times for granite.

Lunetta

Congrats on 8 days!! It does get better I promise. I quit jan 1 and the first few weeks were the toughest but you have to power through and keep busy if you can and I promise it will get so much better. Also posting on here helped me, if you haven't already you should join the April class thread to check in with others quitting at the same time as you. I still keep up with my January class regularly and it helps keep me accountable. Everyone who winds up drinking again seems to deeply regret it and youll see posts about it on SR, those posts are a reminder as to why we quit and helps me move forward. Good luck!

least

Yes, it does get better, a lot better, but it takes longer than a week. Give yourself at least a month or two before expecting to feel normal. It will happen, but you've got to have patience. And don't drink or you'll just have to start over again.

Mirage74

It's just so wierd, I almost feel like Im back on day 2 and not on day 8, like I've regressed. Hopefully it's just temporary. I know tomorrow morning I'll be glad I didn't drink, like I was the past 7 mornings.

Another thing I notice is that everything irritates me. Everywhere I go, something annoys me and sometimes I just feel like cussing people out. I don't, but I feel like it. Did any of you feel like that, at least early on? Everytime I quit and get a few days I start to realize how much anger I have. And that's not good, because no one wants to be around an angry person. The booze melted my anger away. I've never been very good at dealing with anger and frustration. It's just good to know that some of what I'm feeling is dealing with the frustration of quitting alcohol, like a lost best friend.

Wastinglife

I drank heavily for about 6-7 years. When I quit, I was pretty much a sleepless zombie for 2-3 weeks. Our brains need a bit of time to adjust without the booze, but it'll happen if you stay the course. Healthy food and exercise is the best way to help your mood and such.

shauninspain

Well done for doing so well. You have identified something which is vitally important for the recovering alcoholic. Yes, it is early days and after consuming copious amounts of a depressant for many years your mind will not be functioning normally, in a chemical or emotional sense. So what you are experiencing is perfectly normal.

However, from my experience I certainly drank because of how I felt. I have heard it said many times that the drinking of alcohol is a symptom of the illness. Or the external manifestation of the illness. It is what goes on between our ears that is the real problem. Feeling restless, irritable and discontent is, for me at least, something that I have lived with for all of my adult life. Additionally, resentment, fear, anger, lust, envy, jealousy etc all provided me with reasons to drink, or simply the need to escape from reality.

So well done on 8 sober days. Yes, you will start to feel better. But if you're like me you will have some work to do on tending to your emotional/mental life in the months and years to come.

visch1

Mirage, good one on you! As you see most of us have gone through this painful period but by not drinking it does come to an end. Most of us don't deal with pain in the beginning but endure as it recedes. Recovery is not a fast process but it is a process that takes time, that 4 letter word I hated. As far as AA and HP is concerned, it's ANYTHING you decide it is that you're comfortable with today, change it next week if you want. It doesn't have to be a religious belief unless you want it to be. As a non religious person it's worked for me and many others. Remember at AA meetings you have the option of passing. BE WELL

Michael66

Hi Mirage

Personally I found the first few weeks pretty miserable. The original enthusiasm hasd dropped a bit, the cravings were bad, and I wad feeling worse rather than better (lack of sleep, jittery). It's a tough time. For me things really turned around by 3-4 months - cravings by then were much milder and less frequent, and I was starting to feel more energetic and a lot happier. Now I truly love sobriety - its not just something I have to do, it is something I love.

Hang in there, and hunt out what support, like AA, that you need. There's no getting over that it is rough for a while, but it is so worth it. I found keeping a diary useful. That helped track the improvements as they started to kick in.

God bless +

doggonecarl

Something got you to eight days. A higher power? Perhaps, and that was with you not believing. Image how much stronger your recovery would be if you believed some force (God, if you like) could give you the strength to beat this affliction.

I would be amazing.

trachemys

Hey, Mirage, welcome to the lifeboat.

While I never drank them before, I've been using herbal teas to fight some of the recovery pangs. Go to the grocery and find the Celestial Seasons teas. Read the boxes and see what they are blended for. They've got one to help you sleep, one to tame tension, and so on. Hope it helps. I know how the initial days can be. Get through this, don't drink, and you only have to go through it once.

Tammy47

Mirage, I'm coming up to 2 months. But I can tell you those first 2 weeks were the hardest. I continually craved my nightly bottle (or 2) chilled white wine. I came in from work and would go right to bed with lap top/tv, to stay out of harms way. This forum and folks at my meetings (secular meeting I began in February) all advised the major cravings decline, that kept me going. And sure enough they have lessened. Don't get me wrong, I still crave, but the thoughts are less and last for shorter periods. I have a long way to go in this recovery, but I know how important it is for us to hear (esp in those early days) that the hellish thoughts do subside, slowly but surely. Without this advice/hope I would have drank. I've now managed to venture out more, and joined new classes (meditation etc) and that helps me fill the void, build a new life I can be proud of. Hang in there, best wishes.