Yes, to regain trust that we destroyed does take a long time.
I believe it was almost 3 years before my family actually started showing they were starting to trust me again.
Now, many years later, because I have had some instances of infections occurring that I did not know I had, I am a diabetic with a very low immune system and can get infections and not know it, and I dehydrate and my daughter has either found me passed out (low to no potassium causing an epileptic seizure) or totally hallucinating. So even though she is only 6 blocks away I call her daily. If she does not hear from me she calls me.
Several weeks ago I too went to get my haircut, a long overdue haircut, and she apparently called me several times, before I saw it on my phone. My phone had been in my purse. So when I called her back, we laughed but, it was brought home to me again, how important it is, not only for my own health but the emotional and mental health of my daughter to keep in touch.
Whether this was a de ja vue moment for my daughter or not, I did not ask. She was still a pre teen when I found sobriety, but I suspect, that faint thought might have crossed her mind, along with the more recent episodes of my hospitalizations, thanks to her finding me.
I wasn't practicing my 'own' motto:
"Just for today, I will be thoughtful, kind and considerate to all who cross my path and treat all others as I wish to be treated."
As time goes on and you continue to grow and change in sobriety, I believe you will regain, your husband's trust. I found that it is a SLOW process, but was reminded many times by my sponsor that I didn't destroy that trust overnight, and I sure in hell wasn't going to get it back overnight.
Hang in there, you are growing by leaps and bounds!!!!
Love and hugs,
__________________ God Bless You All As You Trudge The Road
Of Happy Destiny (especially when you are
trudgin thru alligators up to your butt)
Sobriety: AA June 7, 1981
Codependency: Alanon June 7, 1984