misskitty25

I haven't been very active on the is board, but I browse it everyday. My docs are marijuana and pain pills. My boyfriend is an alcoholic. About 2 weeks ago, he got a dui, and thus has to remain sober. My problem is that I find myself so bored, depressed and lonely without a joint to keep me company. I only work 2 nights a week, and can't legally get a 9-5 job. So during the day, when I would normally just be high and watch tv all day, I'm so lifeless. I need some things to do. I've promised myself that I'll check out NA, but those meetings are at night too. How do I cope with all of this boredom and sadness. I've been on antidepressants forever, and I'm seeing a counsellor, who thinks I've been misdiagnosed. She thinks ADD is far more likely, because I'm incredibly unorganized and don't focus at all. I'm sure the marijana didn't help, but I've always been a messy, unfocused girl. What can I do that is constuctive? MY b/f and I know that his dui was basically a wakeup call, and I want to take it seriously. But i LOVED getting high, and I feel so empty now. sick, I know. To all of you who have been here, what are good ways to fill my time??

True Blue

hello Misskitty, My doc was also pills & pot. It was hard for the 1st few months, but as time passes you will get into a normal routine of things. Make your self get up and do things, what worked for me was going to meetings, working the steps, my HP, family & all of my friends here at SR. I wish you the best on your new journey. Being clean & sober after 30 years of using and abusing feels great today. The feelings I have inside of me is better than any drug I have ever consumed. Some days I feel so good I feel like I am going to pop. If you belive in a HP ask for his help. Wishing you the best. Keep posting we have a great support group here.

mackat

misskitty
welcome
when i was first getting clean & sober, i went to a bunch of AA/NA meetings and began to fill my time with sober bro stuff- we did the body bowling & food fight circuit til we began to get grown up... then we began to really view life as A Grand Opportunity! Part of my addiction was somehow putting my 'real' life on hold . This Is Not A Dress Rehersal!! i cannot wait all eternity for someone to discover me. So we all caught that message. Some went back or on to school, Some started businesses. we found ourselves doing the stuff we dreamt of doing or were too afraid to do or the things that we had enjoyed before our addictions got in the way.
And , for us, the whole concept of being part of the fellowship and doing service work has stayed in our lives.
mackat

MootPoint

when i was getting clean and sober, i went to the suggested 90 meetings in 90 days. also, AA has a book called "Living Sober" which i would highly suggest. So I suggest that you go to an AA meeting and get that book (it was less than $3 and they would probably give it to you if you can't afford it). Addicts are perfectly welcome at AA. I'm not downing NA... I go there too. Its just that AA has that book

If you can't get to a meeting, hang around here, go for a walk, call a non using friend on the phone......... break your routine. You probably have a routine where you use...... break it.

Take care MissKitty and welcome to SR.

Ann25

Hi Misskitty,
You have way to much time on your hands. Thats weird that there are only evening meetings--my area has them mornings too. Mootpoint had some good advice--go for a walk!! Exercise is good for you and will make you feel better!!! If you can afford it--join a gym ( I know better said then done--I hate to exercise--havent been to the gym in over 3 years!!) haha But when I was going I felt so good--had energy--might meet some new friends!! Who knows?
Hang in there--and keep posting!!!We want to help.
Ann

Anna

You know, Miss Kitty, I have replaced the high times with peace and contentment. My life had become a roller coaster of chaos and I hated that. Now, I love time by myself. When I was drinking, I forgot how many things there were that I loved doing. I never find myself bored or tired of the peace in my life. I never long for the craziness of the high anymore.

Love, Anna

Don S

100 things to do instead of drinking or drugging!

1. Read a book
2. Take a walk
3. Play a musical instrument
4. Knit
5. Clean your closets
6. Research your genealogy
7. Cook a gourmet dinner
8. Write an article for your local newspaper
9. Go take some pictures
10. Clean the mildew in your bathroom
11. Start writing that book you've been planning
12. Plan a garden
13. Plant a garden
14. Play with a pet
15. Read to a child
16. Visit someone in an old folks' home
17. Watch a news special on TV
18. Set up a family budget
19. Make a web site
20. Take up archery
21. Exercise
22. Go to an online recovery meeting
23. Surf the internet
24. Call your mom
25. Learn a foreign language
26. Write a poem
27. Play golf
28. Take a bubble bath
29. Draw
30. Teach a parakeet to whistle
31. Take a nap
32. Listen to music
33. Paint
34. Clean your desk
35. Start a stamp collection
36. Go window shopping
37. Browse in a book store
38. Go to an art gallery
39. Go for a drive
40. Paint a room
41. Watch the clouds go by
42. Play darts
43. Do target shooting
44. Do home repairs
45. Clean your garage
46. Sort your photographs
47. Make a scrapbook
48. Climb a tree
49. Plant a tree
50. Make marmalade
51. Make a list of things to do
52. Write a letter to the editor
53. Volunteer somewhere
54. Take a hike
55. Take a college class
56. Try yoga
57. Meditate
58. Get a massage
59. Make fruit smoothies
60. Bake cookies
61. Do a crossword puzzle
62. Go to the gym
63. Plant a color bowl
64. Sharpen your pruning tools
65. Change your engine oil
66. Sew
67. Groom your dog
68. Go see a play
69. Write a sonnet
70. Sort your recipes
71. Play solitaire
72. Go bird watching
73. Write a letter to a friend
74. Read poetry
75. Repot your house plants
76. Go to a movie
77. Mow your lawn
78. Take down your Christmas lights
79. Make pickles
80. Go jogging
81. Watch sitcoms
82. Plan menus for a diet
83. Do a jigsaw puzzle
84. Play chess
85. Write a country-western song
86. Watch a video
87. Go for a bike ride
88. Plant an herb garden
89. Start an online journal
90. Dye your hair
91. Go to a restaurant
92. Lift weights
93. Bake some bread
94. Learn a martial art
95. Polish the furniture
96. Make a flower arrangement
97. Read the newspaper
98. Start some seeds
99. Sort your magazines
100. Go to bed.

Don S

Seriously, a quote I repeat often goes something like this:
People who achieve longterm sobriety have three characteristics in common:
--they make a commitment to abstinence;
--they make lifestyle changes to enhance that commitment;
--they plan and practice for urges.

Developing new interests to replace your drinking/drugging time is a key component. Finding new interests, or resurrecting old ones, is part of the lifestyle change. Urges often strike because of boredom (seriously! You have no idea how often people mention lapsing because they were bored!).

Sometimes you kind of have to force yourself to adopt new activities. That's why people who practice a musical instrument, or exercise, or learn a foreign language, make a point of doing it for a fixed amount of time every day--like it or not, rain or fog, upbeat attitude or lethargy. Drugging is a passive activity, and marijuana is particularly passive and encourages disorganization and spaciness.

So just making a time and schedule, even for something as mundane as jogging, gardening, or stamp collecting, can get you adopting new habits that replace the old ones. Every day, no matter what. Of course, it helps if what you're doing is something that already interests you or is good for you.

Can we come up with another 50 things to add to the list?
Don S

splendra

Misskitty-
I can come up with 10 more things to do:
1.make your bed
2.do the dishes
3.vacume
4.sweep outside walkways
5.find a radio station that has music you like to dance to
6.mop the kitchen floor while dancing
7.find a subject that interest you and go to the libray and read all you can about it.
8.Pray
9.listen to the different sounds around you
10.look aroud you
Good luck and keep posting here!

Hadenuff

Hi MissKitty,
Great suggestions from all, and I really agree that for me it was very helpful to find things to do that would help me to stay sober. I was into AA, I went to 2-3 meetings a day for almost a year. I felt safe in there cause even though I saw people who were drunk or high on occasion, no one ever tried to tempt me to use or drink. As I have grown I have found other productive ways that help me find peace and I have moved on.
I have to say though in the beginning I found myself trying replace my using with behavior that was just kind of like using but without the drugs but I learned some tough lessons about myself and faced alot of things that I just never dealth with cause I would get high to avoid all of it.
Exercise has been the key for me. Some days I have to push myself but afterward I always feel better.
I am grateful I have found some of my old hobbies bringing me enjoyment again.
so anyway, getting out my head by doing things other than using is what I had to do. I'm not gonna list them but whatever I was doing I was doing that instead of getting high.
hang in and keep posting.
H

Dan

Don, as per bloody usual, you just give me hope.

1. Realized I woke up sober.
2. Took an extra moment to appreciate number one.
3. Called my mom for Mother's Day
4. Came here to catch up with everybody
5. Made a whole bunch of bacon and eggs
6. Admitted to myself I felt frustrated
7. Decided to do something about it
8. Worked up a sweat cutting down some trees
9. Realized I had once again disputed an urge to use
10. Wondered what I was going to do with the fallen trees.

I learn something new everyday.
You will too MissKittty.

Don S

You see fallen trees...my son sees a bonfire. It's all in how you look at things!
Don S

Dan

I hear you Don!
Thank you.

namommy

The NA basic text says "we will soon tire physically from our new activities". Believe it, I was bored at first, and now there is not enough time in the day for all of the things I have to do and want to do. It feels good to go to bed at night tired for a good reason instead of passing out. You'll find activities and hobbies as you grow on your path to recovery. Remember, As long as you don't use there is hope.

Laurie D.

Allyson S.

Misskitty-

I am in your boat. same doc's. It's real hard but I have been trying to take long walks, talk on the phone, go to the movies and clean my house. Check out the list of 100 things. That is fabulous!!! I never did anything without getting high first. I also have AADD and am very scattered. I have ony smoked weed once in the past few weeks and I am feeling better already. Take it slow and you will feel better too.

Good luck!!!