melivinsober

I feel like I have all the tools and knowledge of what it takes to stay sober.... So why am I struggling SO hard to do so. I caught myself reaching for my car keys with intent of going out to get booze. *sigh*
Didn't go btw.... But I'm getting all twitchy and anxious. Can't sleep. Sad thoughts all over the place. My temper is really bad right now.

2 months sober tomorrow... This doesn't seem like it's getting easier for me.

I have so much encouragement and support from other people.

When I think about it... maybe I don't think I'm worthy of happiness.


I really just want to sleep through the rest of the day. :mog

Nonsensical

Sorry you still feel crummy. Good job putting those keys down.

You're probably experiencing 'anhedonia'. That's when your brain gets so used to being stimulated by alcohol that it raises the set point at which you can feel pleasure. Now that you're not drinking, its hard to reach that higher set point.

Set points will naturally return to lower levels again if you stay abstinent. So - stay strong! You can get through to the other side.

Dee74

what exactly are you doing for your recovery, melivin?

D

Anna

Melvin, I'm sorry you're struggling.

I would ask you what changes have you made in your life besides stopping drinking? I found that I had to change pretty much everything in my life. The drinking was a symptom of all the toxic stuff going on in my life.

I hope that you feel better soon.

soberclover

I'm sorry that you are in a funk. I believe that we alcoholics do a number to our body and our centeral nervous system. I think that our brains are re-wiring themselves as mentioned before to work without the alcohol. We are learning to feel again and sometimes those feelings are uncomfortable. This could be where the depression and or anger comes in. For me, when I'm emotionally exhausted, I'm tired all the time. Even at 4 months I still go to bed really early because I'm exhausted just dealing with the day. Sobriety is a lot of work....you should be proud of yourself. Just because we put down the bottle doesn't mean it is all glitter and unicorns suddenly...but it sure does get better then what it was! Learn to celebrate the small accomplishments because in the big picture they are big!

least

Two months sober is still pretty early on. It takes a while for our bodies and brains to heal fully. If you're still feeling this bad down the road do see your doctor. Don't give up!

Odelle

Take a look at Dimlitstar's thread http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...tiredness.html, it seems many of us are going through the same thing. Reading and understanding PAWS (post-acute withdrawal symptoms) helps to put a new perspective on this, as it is a NORMAL part of the recovery process.

melivinsober

Well, I started with deleting some phone numbers of the people I got myself in trouble with, and other various "friends".
I go to AA and a secular sober group called SOS. I've been using the urge surfing... but the past 2 days I guess I've forgotten to use it. I have numbers of some really supportive people. I've been reaching out when I feel the need. Sometimes it's hard to... But I did tonight, thank goodness. I met up with a friend and it was really nice to talk to her.

I've been telling people that I am going to AA. So I am being honest about the fact I'm having struggles.

...I guess I'm not sure what else to do...